br Page 405 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Look! On The Pitch! It's Messi! It's Ronaldo! It's A Goalie Goal!

If you’re going to score a goal as a keeper, you might as well be like KRC Gent’s Kevin Frans in Belgium’s fourth division yesterday and make it a stoppage time, point-saving wonder strike of an overhead kick. You’ll probably only get one—maybe two—in your whole career, so you’d better make it count...

Breeland Speaks Says He Let Tom Brady Go Because He Was Afraid Of Being Penalized

It ultimately didn’t matter much, because there was a defensive holding call on the play that would have given the Pats a first-and-goal, but the oddest play of last night’s thrilling Chiefs-Patriots game belonged to Chiefs linebacker Breeland Speaks....

Broncos Fans Are Fed Up With Case Keenum

The first and most unmistakable sign that a team has a full-fledged QB controversy on its hands is when its coach denies there’s a controversy. “Case is our quarterback,” said Broncos coach Vance Joseph, which means that Case Keenum may not be Denver’s quarterback for all that long....

Bruce Irvin Is The Only Raider Having A Good Day

Emmanuel Sanders's Finger-Wag Celebration Cost The Broncos Dearly

I’ll be the first to admit that the taunting penalty is one of the lamest things about the NFL. In a hyper-aggressive game like football, you’ve got to give players room to express emotions on the field, otherwise it gets held in and boils over. That being said, this taunt might have been a little e...

Chargers Score TD With The Help Of Russell Okung’s Obvious False Start 

Chargers receiver Tyrell Williams caught a nice leaping touchdown in the end zone to take a 20-3 lead over the Browns, and Cleveland’s fans booed loudly. They weren’t booing the score so much as the officials, who they thought missed a false start penalty on Chargers left tackle Russell Okung....

Brock Osweiler To Start Over Ryan Tannehill Against Chicago And Likely Die

A season that began with momentary optimism for the Miami Dolphins has slowly regressed to become the staple of comical mediocrity we all expected it to be. The team’s prospects against the Chicago Bears and their man-eating defensive unit for Sunday got even worse when the Dolphins announced that s...

Gibraltar Wins First Competitive Match In Its History

History was made at the Vazgen Sargsyan Republican Stadium in the Armenian capital on Saturday as Gibraltar won its first ever competitive match, beating Armenia 1-0. The self-governing territory was first officially recognized by UEFA in 2013 and had lost 22 competitive matches since, including all...

Brewers Reliever Brandon Woodruff Bonked A Huge Dinger Off Clayton Kershaw

Brewers pitcher Brandon Woodruff took over for Gio Gonzalez in the third inning of tonight’s NLCS opener, presumably to get through the Dodgers lineup a few times. He aced the third inning, and the promptly sent a Clayton Kershaw fastball 407 feet out to center field for a towering donger....

Browns Owner Jimmy Haslam Will Help Keep The Columbus Crew In Town

The Crew have been saved after all. ...

The Latest Antonio Brown Story Is Weird Even For Antonio Brown

He called a well-respected, longtime Steelers beat reporter a “clown” and accused that reporter of “making shit up.” He threatened another reporter for writing an unflattering profile of him. He’s been openly grumpy. He’s blown off work. And that’s just the stuff that’s kept Antonio Brown’s name in ...

Red Sox Survive Near Ass-Shitting, Eliminate Yankees

The Red Sox went for the kill Tuesday night. Ahead 4–1 headed to the bottom of the eighth inning, Alex Cora sent ace Chris Sale to the mound in relief. This should of course not screw with Sale’s availability in the ALCS, but it is for sure not a decision that was taken lightly. ...

Ass Team Of The Week: The Ravens Won The Ass-Off

Listen, any doo-doo team can go out there and get the shit kicked out of them by the Rams or the Chiefs. The truest expressions of buttness tend to happen when one meaty cheek meets another, combining to form one giant Voltron ass with a stink that envelopes the whole game. On Sunday the Baltimore R...

Red Sox Make History With Savage Game 3 Beatdown Of Yankees

The fourth inning was pure hell for the Yankees Monday night, and euphoric for Red Sox fans. Luis Severino, who was so strong in the AL Wild Card game, put three men on to open the inning. Lance Lynn came on in relief and immediately walked in a run, then gave up a two-run double. He was yanked havi...

Refs Flag Excessive Celebration After Drew Brees Breaks All-Time Passing Yardage Mark [UPDATE]

Drew Brees came into Monday night’s home game against Washington needing 201 yards to break Peyton Manning’s career passing yardage record of 71,940* yards. He could’ve dinked and dunked his way to the record, but fuck that—in the second quarter, with his team already up 20–6, Brees unloaded a long ...

The Brewers Have Played This All Perfectly

There is no one way to build a really good baseball team. Historically, the innovative Just Spend As Much Money As Needed On The Best Players Available model has a pretty solid track record, but even longtime adherents of that approach have recently backed away from it due to ... well, we can probab...

"Hold On, Hazel! I Had To Pee!"

Cleveland manager Terry Francona was a little delayed in his mid-inning dugout interview during Saturday’s Game 2 against the Astros, as he timed his bathroom break poorly. That’s how the TBS backhaul caught him buttoning up his pants as he scrambled up to the top step....

Ronald Acuña Is Doing His Best To Carry The Braves

Freddie Freeman earned himself a big chunk of the glory with his tie-breaking dong in Sunday night’s 6-5 Braves win over the Dodgers, but Atlanta might not have even been close to taking the lead in the sixth inning of Game 3 had it not been for the 20-year-old sensation Ronald Acuña Jr., who’s doin...

The Rockies' Playoff Run Was A Four-Game Whimper

If anyone thought that the Colorado Rockies’ extra-innings victory in the wild-card game portended more exciting playoff action to come, those people were dead wrong. All that was true about that 2-1 win against the Cubs remained true throughout Colorado’s three-game sweep at the hands of the Milwau...

This Hit On Brandin Cooks Was Somehow Not Flagged

The NFL appears to have completely abandoned its newly-instated helmet rule that caused loads of controversy in the first couple weeks of the preseason. No penalties were called on Tedric Thompson after he nearly took Brandin Cooks head clean off of his body late in the second quarter of Rams-Seahaw...