br Page 822 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
My Peach-Cobbler Hallucination About LeBron James, PCP, Outlaw Bikers, Cocks, Abortion, And Suicide
When LeBron James stood up the Cavs live on ESPN last season, Esquire writer Scott Raab took his 50-plus years of sad-sack Cleveland sports fandom and became a one-man hate machine. For those of you annoyed by Raab's anti-King James Twitter rantings last year, you'll be happy to know his new book is...
Yesterday: The Greatest Catch That Never Officially Happened Of The NFL Season
There hasn't been much to be happy about recently in Kansas City, save Todd Haley's beard. Yesterday the Chiefs lost to Tim Tebow, who completed but two passes all day, and his third-string running back, Lance Ball....
Is Tim Tebow’s Afraid-To-Throw Broncos Offense Crazy Enough To Work?
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....
Colt McCoy Gets Sacked, Chucks The Ball At The Rams Twice, Gets Away With It
Your morning roundup for Nov. 14, the day we learned airport security stops terrorists, not kleptomaniacs. Video via Michael L. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Dez Bryant Sends Jim Nantz Into Hysterics With Great Touchdown Grab
Dez Bryant ripped this pass right out of the hands of Leodis McKelvin and scored the Cowboys first touchdown of the day. It is unclear whether a CBS intern was required to get a new pair of underwear for Jim Nantz. We are following up....
Penn State vs. Nebraska: Your Open Thread
Well, here it is. Actual football after all the madness of this week. Let's discuss it like rational adults down below, yes? If you're behind, catch up on all our Penn State coverage here. ...
Penn State Students Get It Right With The "Blue Out"
A Nittany Lions football game is going to happen tomorrow, whether we're ready for it or not. It was never going to not happen, no matter how hyperbolic the calls for death penalties both literal and figurative. It would be nice if there could be more clarity to a murky situation by game day, but co...
The Saddest Sad Faces Of Sad Penn State Bros
Bros, we must mourn. The greatest bro of all, Joe Paterno—whom one could affectionately refer to as Bro Paternbro—has been fired as head coach of PSU football. Life will never be the same, bros. Football will never be so pure again. Hang your head, remove your backwards New Era cap, and say a prayer...
Just When You Thought Humanity Couldn't Go Lower, Someone Steals Shawn Bradley's Bicycle
When Shawn Bradley returned to his suburban Salt Lake City home, he found his barn door open and his Trek bicycle gone. Bradley is "upset" and "frustrated" and "dumbfounded," mostly because the bike is custom-made for his height and there are probably eight people in the world who would even be able...
Zlatan Ibrahimovic Admits To Catching A Beating From Oguchi Onyewu
In AC MIlan striker Zlatan Ibrahimovic's new autobiography, he describes his 2010 brawl with Oguchi Onyewu. Ibrahimovic may have a black belt in taekwondo, but Onyewu has a black belt in hurting Swedes: "[T]he two players 'wanted to destroy each other,'... 'I'm not talking about a small row,' Ibrahi...
NHL Rookies Draw Like 4-Year-Olds
That up there is the handiwork of Avs rookie Gabriel Landeskog, and it's a hell of a medical textbook cross-section of a watermelon. Except it's not that. It's Landeskog's favorite pregame meal of spaghetti (we assume he pronounced it "pasgetti") and Swedish meatballs. This is acceptable because he ...
Is It Time To Lose Faith In The New England Patriots?
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....
LeBron Dunks, Mean Mugs, Refuses Lady's High-Five
LeBron played in Rudy Gay's charity all-star game just outside of Memphis last night. He scored 43 points and, as he tends to do, made no new friends at the DeSoto Civic Center in Southaven, Miss. There might be a lockout underway, but worry not, heathens: Together, we will still find ways to mock...
"Giggly Giggly Girl" Celebrates Weight Loss With "Jiggly Jiggly" Video
Congratulations on reaching your goal, lady in the rainbow wig who made this video. You are to be commended....
Twitter-Obsessed Soccer Player Gives Child Very Unfortunate Name
Gabriel Zakuani is a Congolese defender for Peterborough, who had a cup of coffee at the top level but couldn't quite cut it. But he's given his son a name as stupid as any Premier leaguer's child....
Jerry Sandusky's Son, Cleveland Browns Executive, Has Taken A Leave Of Absence
"Heard that Jon Sandusky, Browns GM Tom Heckert's top assistant, has taken leave of absence. He is the son of Jerry Sandusky." At Penn State, Jon played safety under his dad from 1996-1999. [@TonyGrossi, h/t Cory]...
How A Comedian Helped Birth The "F-You" Patriots
Back in September 2007, the Patriots were caught taping the Jets' defensive signals on the sideline. This was week one, after the Patriots beat the Jets, 38-14. The next 15 games—all of which the Patriots won—were blowouts a lot like that, but with a venomous edge. In his new book, War Room, which h...
Eli Manning Beats Tom Brady, Will Still Not Be Considered Elite: Your Sunday NFL Roundup
For whatever reason, Eli will always be considered just an "OK" quarterback. Maybe it's because he is a contemporary of some very, very good quarterbacks—one of whom is his big brother—or maybe it's because he is kind of a doofus. Either way, here's your Sunday roundup. Enjoy....
Brady-Manning Redux, No, The Other Manning: Your NFL Late Games Open Thread
Tom Brady > Eli Manning. Just look at their shirts. Come on, let's talk football down in the comments....