br Page 827 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Pete Carroll Pleads With LeBron, Because Apparently The Seahawks Need His Help To Underachieve
Your morning roundup for Oct. 13, the day we learned just how dangerous some sex toys can be. Photo via @PeteCarroll. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

The Delayed Start Of The NBA Season Gets The Taiwanese Animation Treatment
In Taiwanese animators's perception of the current NBA lockout, commissioner David Stern wields a chainsaw, cries when the Detroit Pistons flat-line in a hospital bed, guards Derek Fisher and gay marries Time Warner Cable. Also, LeBron James wears a lil-boy crown and gets shattered-backboard dunke...

Your Brewers-Cardinals, Weather-Permitting Game Three Open Thread
Tonight, Yovani Gallardo of the Brewers will face off against fake-ass Chris Carpenter of the Cardinals in a NLCS tied at one a piece. Gallardo isn't very good against the Cardinals, per a St. Louis newspaper and numbers. Meanwhile, Carpenter "has had hiccups" against the Brewers, per a Milwaukee n...

Man Who Threw Hot Dog At Tiger Woods Was "Inspired By The Movie <i>Drive</i>" To Do Something "Epic"
The man who attempted (and failed) to throw a hot dog at Tiger Woods at the Frys.com Open last weekend has been identified. He is Brandon Kelly, a 31-year-old from Petaluma, Calif., and he is really into the movie Drive....

Now Kevin Youkilis Is Maybe Dating Tom Brady's Sister, According To Mysteriously Deleted Article
The Boston Herald went to sleep proud of itself for landing the scoop that Theo Epstein is on his way to Chicago. They woke up to the Globe's comprehensive hit on the hard-partying 2011 Red Sox that's the only topic in town....

Adrian Beltre Was All Set To Tackle Miguel Cabrera
Your morning roundup for Oct. 12, the day we learned that charming door-to-door breast examiner turned out to be a phony. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Bryan Stow Has Left The Hospital
It's great that Bryan Stow is getting transferred from a hospital to a long-term rehabilitation center more than six months after getting beaten into a coma outside Dodger Stadium. Especially when the San Francisco Chronicle story about it contains this vignette:...

This Evening: Lead The Broncos's New Starting QB Not Into Temptation With Girls In Bikinis
Your p.m. roundup for Oct. 11, the day a story about freeze-dried dogs proved to be just as disturbing as it sounds. Photo via SI Vault. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Good Luck Charm? Cardinals Play-By-Play Broadcaster Might Have Wet Himself During His DWI Arrest
Two Sundays ago, Fox Sports Midwest's Dan McLaughlin was arrested for driving drunk after he crashed into a stop sign in Chesterfield, a suburb of St. Louis. He was suspended from work, even though FSM doesn't carry postseason games so his year was effectively over. That mugshot, on the left, is the...

Tim Tebow Gives Us Our First Total QBR Kerfuffle
I've been pleasantly surprised with my lack of exposure to Total Quarterback Rating, ESPN's proprietary formula for measuring QB that's supposed to be more accurate, or at least more complete, than passer rating. After the preseason blitz, I absolutely expected it to be shoved down my throat. But it...

Your Cardinals-Brewers NLCS Game Two Open Thread
At least baseball had a rainout excuse when it came to the unfortunate-for-ratings start time of this afternoon's Tigers-Rangers affair. It has nowhere to hide when it comes to tonight's next installment of the NLCS, which will attempt to compete directly for eyeballs with Monday Night Football—and...

Mike Shanahan Once Ordered Elvis Grbac To Drill Al Davis In The Head With A Pass
Al Davis had plenty of respect within the NFL power structure, as we learned this weekend. Those of us who knew him only as a craggy-faced Jamarcus-loving iconoclast now know of him as something better than that, a powerfully transformative figure. But he still had enemies. Among them: onetime Raide...

It Is Tebow Time O'Clock In Denver
Just a week ago, it was not Tebow time in Denver. It was Orton time. Yesterday, though, the big hand turned during "The Most Exciting Broncos Loss of the 2011 Season." Here is a collection of time-keeping from the Denver timekeepers....

The Impact And The Darkness: The Lasting Effect Of Peter Gent's <em>North Dallas Forty</em>
At the climactic moment in the climactic game near the end of the 1979 film North Dallas Forty, Delma Huddle, having reluctantly let the team doctor shoot up his damaged hamstring, starts upfield after catching a pass, then suddenly pulls up lame and gets obliterated by a linebacker moving at full...

So D'Brickashaw Ferguson's Shoe Got Stuck In Patrick Chung's Helmet For A Bit Yesterday (Video)
The Jets tackle delivered a block on Kyle Arrington when his foot met Chung's facemask and wouldn't let go, ripping the helmet right off of Chung's head. Ferguson would need the assistance of two officials to finally pry the shoe loose. [Cosby Sweaters]...

The Titans Recovered. The Steelers Recovered. The Titans Recovered. The Steelers Recovered...
Your morning roundup for Oct. 10, the day we learned of the moral superiority of babies. Photo of confused officials via Guyism. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Your Cardinals-Brewers NLCS Game One Open Thread
The Brewers and Cardinals faced off 18 times during the regular season, with each team winning nine. Since Aug. 30, though, the Cardinals took five of six. That stat matters....

Watch Brek Shea Fall Down Rather Than Score A Goal Against Honduras
What Jürgen Klinsmann's doing by giving fresh, young faces like Brek Shea a shot to contribute to the U.S. Men's National Team might be exactly what the American soccer needed to evolve beyond second-tier international relegation....

If You Dare Approach Frank Beamer On The Football Field, The Virginia State Police Will Disappear You
Your morning roundup for Oct. 9, the day we learned they won't keep you in the clink very long after threatening to cook your friend's mom. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

This Year, Ryan Howard's Season-Ending At-Bat Resulted In Physical Injury
Your morning roundup for Oct. 8, the day we learn that it's best just to plead guilty when caught handing out semen-tainted yogurt at the market. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....