br Page 847 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here, Watch Donald Brashear Beat Up A Fat Guy In His MMA Debut
Some fellow named Mathieu Bergeron decided to fight former NHL goon Donald Brashear—who is 15th all-time in penalty minutes, and now making his MMA debut—in Quebec City (au Colisée Pepsi) on Saturday night. Not a good call. Brashear scored a TKO in 21 seconds....

Vancouver Announcers Have Different Opinion About Taunt By Vancouver Player, Believe It Or Not
The hubbub over Alex Burrows' biting Patrice Bergeron's finger in Game 1 intensified when the not-suspended Burrows scored two goals in the next game, including the game-winner. Max Lapierre didn't exactly help the cause when he offered Bergeron his own digit as compensation. "Have a bite! There's...

Watch Sebastien Buemi Hit A Crazy Fan With His F1 Car In Japan
Formula One driver Sebastien Buemi was in Japan at a Red Bull F1 Exhibition when a fan attempted to jump over his moving race car with predictably disastrous results. [Jalopnik]...

This Is The Worst Thing Ever To Come Out Of Boston
[h/t and blame Puck Daddy for this one]...

Cubs Pitcher Can't Break A Bat Over His Leg Unless Given Two Attempts
After watching his pitcher lose his shit after a Houston Astro struck him out, Cubs manager Mike Quade compared Carlos Zambrano to Cosmo Kramer....

An Edmonton Oiler Picked Up A Hitchhiking Bono In Vancouver
As a young driver, they used to tell me: Always pick up hitchhikers. You never know when one of them will be the guy who scored Spider-Man: the Musical....

Braves Reliever Peter Moylan Is Ready To Strut
Moylan tweeted a photo of his fiancée in the dress she planned on wearing to the ESPYs. Then he, uh, tweeted a photo of himself ("Thanks for the feedback! I was gonna wear this!! What do u think?") in a dress that showed more tattoos and cleavage than did his fiancée's....

Here's Video Of Raffi Torres's Stanley Cup Finals Game One Winning Goal For The Canucks
Tim Thomas and the Boston Bruins held the home team scoreless for two periods, 19 minutes and 41.5 seconds. The Vancouver Canucks held the Bruins scoreless for all three periods....

Lady Horse Who Finished Racing Career 19-1 Blogs About Getting Knocked Up
For all the talk about Zenyatta possibly being the best racehorse ever, what was left out of the debate was her equability to keep a diary. Entry #261 was posted on Zenyatta.com today. Here's a portion of what she had to say:...

Your Canucks/Bruins Game One Open Thread
The Vancouver Sun went ahead and ran a feature headlined, "Bleacher Report's 15 bold predictions for the Stanley Cup Finals." So, there are 15 bold reasons why the Vancouver Canucks should go another 41 years without winning the Stanley Cup....

Network Airing Stanley Cup Finals Does Not Know Who Is In Stanley Cup Finals
This is what you get for slashing Dick Ebersol's $600 billion promo budget....

Dan Snyder's Latest Media Blitz Makes Everyone Look Like A Simpering Ass
Dan Snyder doesn't do many interviews. The reason: When Dan Snyder opens his mouth, he embarrasses himself. The Redskins owner appears comfortable only when speaking in sound bites about how his blood runs "burgundy and gold." So it came as a surprise last week when Snyder sat down with the DC aff...

Rampage Jackson Comes Very Close To Motorboating This Reporter
On Saturday, Rampage Jackson decisioned Matt Hamill in the main event of a UFC card that nobody cared about. After the fight, Jackson was his typical charming, wanton self. Here's an interview he did with Karyn Bryant of MMA Heat in which Jackson all but ravages her at the press-conference podium....

Watch Wrigley Field Get Buzzed By An Unexpected F/A-18 Flyover
Well, okay, Cubs fans, you can either find some meaning in seeing fighter jets on a holiday remembering American soldiers, or you can be scared that Chicago somehow became the setting of a Will Smith movie come to life. Your choice....

Hey, Look, It's Skip Bayless and Chris Broussard Maiming Each Other On TV
Amped-Up Sports Talk With Real Opinions never sleeps, people. It doesn't take days off, not national holidays, and not days when there are no compelling sporting events going on....

Deadspin Classic: Kellen Winslow, Forever Not An Actual Soldier
On Memorial Day, we figured it might be worthwhile to pay tribute to those who lost their ACLs in motorcycle accidents, shortly after fighting for The U. Perspective, you know, is free. (Jack Dickey)...

Watch JR Hildebrand Lose The Indy 500 By Crashing On The Final Turn
The history book will show that Dan Wheldon won the 100th Indianapolis 500. The replay shows that he didn't so much win it as rookie JR Hildebrand lost it in ridiculously tire-breaking fashion....

FC Barcelona Proved They Were The Best Team In All Of Professional Sports Yesterday
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day Roger Ebert inexplicably gave two thumbs down to those who blatantly allowed two eyes to check out two foreign boobs....

Heat Fan Uses Windowless Van To Call Out "Sixters" Fans, Haters In General (Update)
It would be easy to quibble with the fact that brunch comes before lunch in general order of meals eaten, but art is subjective and best when open to multiple interpretations. Translation: this artist might have been layering in a message by not putting the Celtics before the Bulls....

Hockey Player Misses Five Minutes Of Game Time With Broken Face, Returns In Time For Season-Losing Goal
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day after death told the world that the puffy-faced Grandma Bandit was actually a man....