br Page 902 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Last Night's Winner: LeBron James Bearishness
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like every writer who's had a nuclear "Fuck LBJ" column rattling around in their brain. After James's performance last night, most of them pushed the red button....
LeBron Plays Basketball Poorly; City of Cleveland Placed On Suicide Watch
The Cleveland Cavaliers were absolutely pasted tonight, at home, by the old and previously-thought-to-be-decrepit Celtics. LeBron James was not much help. It's big "Uh Oh" time in Northeastern Ohio....
Lebron Makes Live-Action Mega Man Movie
Sure, it's a filmmaker named Eddie Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Comics Alliance]...
Lebron Once Gunned Down Five Members Of Congress
Sure, it was a Puerto Rican independence activist named Lolita Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [The Hill]...
Lebron Attends Prom In Duct Tape Tux
Sure, it's an Ohio high schooler named Louie Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Youngstown News]...
Lebron Arrested For Impersonating An Officer
Sure, it's a Chicago man named David Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Sun-Times]...
Lebron Vows To Save New York
Sure, it's a former Albany mayoral candidate-turned-deputy commissioner at the State Liquor Authority named Nathan Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Times Union]...
Bruins Fans Toss Epithets, Foodstuffs, Trojan-ENZ At Flyers Fan
All Adam Gonsiewski, a Simon Gagne jersey-owning Flyers fan, wanted to do was see his team win Game 5 against the Bruins. Instead he was pelted with various (unused?) prophylactics by the rowdy Beantown crowd. Like this one. [Crossing Broad via Philly.com]...
Lebron Undergoes Elbow Surgery
Sure, it's an Orioles minor league pitcher named Luis Lebron. But still, could you imagine? (Did you folks forget this little gem?) [Balt Sun]...
Drew Rosenhaus Breaking Flaming Bricks Is A Metaphor For His Negotiating Skills ... Or Something
Turns out Drew Rosenhaus, noted driveway-press-conference hobbyist, also enjoys training in the martial arts when he isn't forcing your favorite team to give an extra year and $3 million dollar roster bonus to Olindo Mare. [Tauntr]...
Associated Press To Punish Brian Cushing For Making Its Voters Look Bad
The AP wants to reclaim Brian Cushing's Defensive Rookie of the Year Award, because giving prizes to drug cheats makes them look foolish. Almost as foolish as calling takebacks on meaningless post-season awards....
Boston Mayor Needs A Refresher Course On Boston Sports
Confused Mayor Thomas Menino reminiscences about some of Beantown's "ionic" sports moments: "Havlicek stole the ball, Fisk waiving the ball fair, Flutie launching the Hail Mary pass, Varitek splitting the uprights." No mention of Antoine Walker's bloody shoulder pads? [Globe]...
Minor League Hockey Fight Provides Us With A Reason To Watch Minor League Hockey
Last night, during Game 5 of their ECHL playoff series, the Cincinnati Cyclones and Reading Royals engaged in one of the best hockey team fights ever. Enjoy the narration and the sight of grown men being thrown about like rag dolls....
Dallas Braden's Perfecto: A Musical Retrospective
Dallas Braden became the world's most notable mound-owning, finger-mustache-tattoo enthusiast on Sunday when he threw the 19th perfect game in MLB history. To celebrate, here are all 27 outs set to a song Braden undoubtedly likes. [Tune-age via The Misfits]...
Drogba Performs His Second Greatest Ever Celebration…
Well done to the 75 per cent of Spoiler readers who correctly fingered Chelsea as the eventual Premier League winners....
Notre Dame Golfer DQ'ed For Pulling Scores Out Of Her Ass
Annie Brophy was booted from this weekend's NCAA Regional for giving herself a 30 on the front nine, even though she didn't shoot anywhere near that. Somewhere, Hootie Johnson is tenting his fingers and cackling. [Golfweek]...
Cavs' Offer To LeBron Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cleveland's chances at keeping LeBron, which, thanks to three blowout conference semifinals, are looking slightly brighter this morning....
Because Shaking Hands With Brian Scalabrine Is A Total Jinx
Scalabrine, the red-headed bench warmer, never gets to join in any reindeer games. Maybe it was the Clark Griswold lounge-cruising footwear that caused Tony Allen and Big Baby Davis to just blatantly ignore him. (H/T MK Migraine) [YouTube]...
Other Things They Do In The 209, Apparently: Throw Perfect Games (UPDATE)
Dallas Braden, last seen hereabouts mistaking Stockton, Calif., for Tombstone, just threw the 19th perfect game in MLB history, against the Rays. They don't do much hitting in the 727, do they? UPDATE: And now Braden's grandmother starts shit-talking A-Rod, too....
Kobe's A Pilgrim, Kobe's A Stranger
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....