br Page 913 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Miss Manners Says That's A Pur-Don't
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The Backup Catcher, The NBA Journeyman's Wife, And The Gropey Grandpa
More details emerge in the arrest of Gerald Laird and his prospect brother after a drunken brawl at a Suns game. The whole thing was set off when their grandfather groped a Celtics wife. Isn't that how it always happens?...

Because Everything Is About Brett Favre, Always
Reports have Elin Nordegren staying at Favre's Mississippi home while visiting Tiger in sex rehab, which we have yet to prove he's in anyway. If you piggyback a false rumor on another false rumor, does that make it true? [Via]...

Let's Not Form An Angry Mob Just Yet
Eugene police would like you to know that Jeremiah Masoli and Garrett Embry are not considered suspects at this time. So put away the torches for now. [KMTR]...

Tim Layden Bids Farewell To Brett Favre With Some Sexy Slash Fiction
There are two noble conventions of football journalism that will fall by the wayside should Brett Favre elect to sit his old ass down for good. The first is of the Werder-Mortensen "Sources: Favre eats soup" variety. And the second?...

Oregon "Hoodrats" Accused Of Stealing From Frat Members
There's trouble a-brewin' in Eugene as two Oregon football players have been accused of stealing computers from a fraternity. It's a classic campus sports crime story with a neat little dash of racial strife....

It Appears Everyone Can Now Make Half-Court Shots At Olathe Northwest's Gym
Okay — this is officially insane. FOX4 went back to do a follow-up story about Joel Branstrom's blind-folded half-court shot. Reporter Rob Low, just shooting a teaser for the spot, tried one of his own (backwards)...and also made it....

A More Visceral, Profane Reaction To Favre's Interception
One Favre-jersey wearer, shows us what it's like to go into apoplectic shock, while his poor daughter just yelps. I get the sense he kicked something hard once the game mercifully ended. [TheScore]...

A Video Treasury Of Brett Favre's Season-Ending Interceptions (UPDATE)
Brett Favre has now thrown an interception in his last significant pass of the last game of the last three seasons. Let's look back at the ol' gunslinger fearlessly doing the thing that makes Tom Jackson admire him so....

Ryan Miller: Party Animal
This should cheer you up. While visiting San Jose, the Buffalo Sabres were booked in the same hotel as a furry convention. (That happens a lot, apparently.) [Thanks to Chris B. for the photo.]...

Bourbon Street Looked Like The Most Fun Place On Earth Last Night
Now, this is not Detroit, man. Nola.com has amazing footage of the joyful chaos on Bourbon Street last night after Garrett Hartley split the uprights (he's apparently a soothsayer, too). There's brassy marching, unreserved embracing and abundant whodatting! [ViaSBNation]...

Vikings Radio Announcers Do Little To Hide Their Anger, Frustration and Disappointment After Favre INT
"This is not Detroit, man — THIS IS THE SUPER BOWL!" Poor guys. [SI.com/Via ExtraMustard...

Jets Fans Don't Fare Much Better Against Indianapolis Police
Everyone expects sadistic fascist police action in San Diego, but surely the good Midwestern people of Indianapolis (a.k.a., Real America) would welcome visiting football fans with open arms? Or you know....taser them in the parking lot....

The Brett Favre Anti-Appreciation Society Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like all the Brett Favre haters who got exactly what they wanted at precisely the time they needed. You have two more wishes....

Your NFC Championship Open Thread
Supposedly there are more fellows playing in this game, going by the names of Bush, Peterson, Brees and others. That's not what I hear. All I hear is Favre Favre Favre....

Pants On The Ground Has Gone Way Too Far
American Idol freakshow "General" Larry Platt and his magnum opus "Pants On The Ground" have become an integral part of the Vikings playoff run. So much so that Platt showed up at the team meeting today, and performed. Video below....

Mark Sanchez Graduates From Poise To Chutzpah
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Favre's Success Tears NFC North Apart
The Sun-Times says: "Go New Orleans, save us from Brett Favre!" The Tribune says: "Leave Brett Favre alone!" The Green Bay Press-Gazette could not be reached for comment, presumably having drank itself to death in the woods. [Sun-Times, Trib]...

Last Night's Winner: No Comment
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like some creatures we can actually comment on without pissing off our lawyers....