cc Page 278 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Premier League Text Message Scandal Is Making Everybody Stupid
May you never have to be defended by Harry Redknapp. ...
What An Enormous Boner
Peruvian side Universidad César Vallejo took a 2-1 lead into the half against Colombian squad Millonarios in Copa Sudamericana action tonight thanks to the enormous boner of Millonarios keeper Luis Enrique Delgado....
Kid Asks Jamie Carragher The Only Luis Suárez Question Worth Asking
A kid at a soccer camp asked Jamie Carragher, former Liverpool teammate of the bitey Luis Suárez, if Suárez ever sank his teeth into him. Carragher gave no answer except for a laugh. Kid should have followed up....
Turkish Soccer Fans Honor Mike Brown
[Besiktas fans at today's Champions League qualifying match against Arsenal hold up a sign in honor of Mike Brown, the unarmed 18-year-old who was shot dead by police in Ferguson, Missouri, last week. Photo by Ehran Aladi/Getty]...
How Chelsea's Missing Piece Fell Into Their Lap
Yesterday, Chelsea kicked off their season against Premier League minnows Burnley. When the match started, their new, star midfielder Cesc Fàbregas looked strange, out of place donned in blue. He didn't seem like he fit. ...
Chelsea, <em>Hot Damn</em>
It's too early to declare something a goal of the year contender...right?...
The 49ers' New Stadium Is Probably The Future Of Concessions
Yesterday saw the 49ers' very first game at their new home, Levi's Stadium, and if you had to pick one quote from a fan to summarize the tens of thousands of opinions out there, it'd be the one the Chronicle got from one season-ticket holder: "I live in San Francisco, so it's a little far. But t...
Matthew McConaughey Rocks A Fanny Pack At Astros-Red Sox Game
Matthew McConaughey—the lieutenant of L-I-V-I-N, the commander of casual, the bombardier of being real—was at Sunday's Astros-Red Sox game, wearing a fanny pack. He did not care about anyone else's opinion of his fanny pack....
Tony Randazzo Ejects Lloyd McClendon In Two Consecutive Games
Tony Randazzo ejected Seattle manager Lloyd McClendon Saturday night for arguing balls and strikes and he just tossed him again today for waving his hand in disagreement with a check swing call on Alex Avila. Last night, McClendon was tossed before he could step onto the field, but when he did Randa...
Something Disgusting Happened In Ashley Young's Mouth
It's hard to say exactly what this is that flies directly into Ashley Young's mouth—many on Twitter say it's bird shit, which should make you want to eat Clorox wipes for a week—but even if it's just human spit, it's equal parts amazing and gross. ...
West Ham Idiot Runs Length Of Pitch, Takes Free Kick For Spurs
An Idiot On The Field invaded the pitch at Upton Park today, and made the most of his time in the spotlight: he took a crucial free kick for the visiting Tottenham Hotspur....
This Isn't Your Club's Year: Our 2014-2015 Premier League Preview
Woohoo, soccer people. We're back....
Let It Be Demolished: Paul McCartney Shuts Down Candlestick Park
Paul McCartney is like the Grand Canyon, or bangers and mash: There's no sexing him up. At 72, he's the rare individual for whom the phrase "living legend" feels like kind of a slight. Bigger than Jesus? Quite possibly. But how many records did Jesus ever sell, and what has he done for you lately? T...
Angry Soccer Coach Tries To Kick Ball, Falls Right On His Ass
Here is your latest reminder that you should never, ever try to kick something while you are angry. Because when you are angry you tend to forget things—like the fact that you are wearing very expensive dress shoes and standing on a slick floor, and that even though you are so damn mad and that ball...
Chip Kelly Is Basically The Eagles' Life Coach
We've figured out by now that Eagles head coach Chip Kelly is a guy who likes to let his work speak for him, but in Seth Wickersham's feature, for which Kelly declined to talk, we get details of how far Kelly's influence seeps into his players' minds....
Robin Williams's Terminal Condition: On <em>The World According to Garp</em>
In 1982, Robin Williams went on a Dallas-area talk show to discuss his title role in the film adaptation of John Irving's novel The World According to Garp. The show's host—a cheerful, robotic woman named Bobbie Wygant—asks her questions, and Williams provides his answers....
FIFA Insists Women Play On Turf, Even Though They Hate It
The 2015 women's World Cup is still quite a long way off, but that doesn't mean that FIFA isn't already working hard on alienating the participants. No organization is better at being the worst than FIFA, except for maybe SMERSH....
Borussia Dortmund Player Scores Goal, Dons Spider-Man Mask
Borussia Dortmund beat Bayern Munich 2-0 in the DFL Supercup today, thanks in large part to a spectacular header from Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang in the 61st minute. After he scored, Aubameyang yanked a Spider-Man mask out of his sock and put it on his head because, sure, why the hell not?...