cc Page 382 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ah Yes, The Old "Off The Back Of The Defender's Skull" Own Goal
In keeping with our mission to bring you the latest in Midwestern religious college soccer, we happily present a moment from this weekend's Oklahoma Baptist-MidAmerica Nazarene showdown. The OBU Bison keeper will be seeing this one in his dreams for a while, but we're particularly taken with the c...

Levante 1, Real Madrid 0: How Did The Team That's "Ugly, Poor, And Bad At Football" Beat La Liga's Rich Pretty Boy?
A year ago, Levante earned a draw against Real Madrid, the best, wealthiest, handomest team in all of La Liga. It was a big moment for the Levante Granotes (that means frogs): Striker Rafa Jordá likened the 0-0 decision to "chewing the face off your girlfriend." (We'll blame shaky translation for th...

EA Sports' New "Dive" Feature In <i>FIFA 12</i> Could Have Been More Subtle
When you put out a football game every year (American or European), you're faced with the difficult task of keeping it fresh. To that end, one of the most hyped additions to FIFA 12 is the heralded Player Impact Engine. It's an "advanced procedural animation system tied with accurate collision phy...

This Poor Ball Boy Wasn't Trained In The Art Of Catching A Soccer Ball Before It Hits His Face
Poor little Australian fella working the sidelines at a Queensland State game turned in a valiant attempt to catch a soccer ball rebounding off a wall behind the goal. He failed to do so....

Watch Luke McCown And Mark Sanchez Take Quarterback Ineptitude To New Heights
If you wanted to watch two NFL quarterbacks at the top of their craft doing battle, the Jets-Jaguars game was not for you. If, instead, you were looking for failure begetting failure, Mark Sanchez and Luke McCown delivered....

Watch Wayne Rooney Totally Flub A Penalty Kick Against Chelsea
Oh Shrek. Poor Shrek. His plant foot slipped while he was trying to put Manchester United up 4-1 on rival Chelsea, kicked the ball into his other foot sending it wide of the net and fell down go boom. (Start at 0:32 is the silent-picture aspect of the video bothers you)....

An Italian-League Goalkeeper Got Knocked Unconscious From A Kick To The Head (Video)
AS Roma goalkeeper Maarten Stekelenburg was hospitalized after getting kicked in the head by Inter Milan's Lucio during a scoreless Serie A draw today....

Boise State Calls Mississippi State's Misspelling And Raises Em A Misplaced Apostrophe
Your morning roundup for Sept. 17, a day we pour one out for the late Jeffrey Jarrett. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Watch A Nervous MLS Rookie Recite A Spoken-Word Love Poem To Hope Solo
C.J. Sapong is a rookie forward for Sporting Kansas City, and he is creepily heartsick for goalie-dancer Hope Solo. So with the U.S. women's national team in town for Saturday's friendly against Canada, Sapong did what any tormented soul would do: he "stayed up late" and wrote her a spoken word lo...

Jim Leyland Is Finally Wearing A Fresh Pair Of Underwear
At some point during the Tigers' 12-game win streak, we unfortunately learned this week, manager Jim Leyland and hitting coach Lloyd McClendon stopped changing their underwear. Detroit lost to the A's 6-1 last night—still a partial victory for everyone else in the Tigers clubhouse....

Jozy Altidore Scored A Nice Goal In His UEFA Europa League Match Today
UEFA's version of the NIT hoops tournament commenced today with 24 Europa League matches. Proud American striker Jozy Altidore provided the first of four goals that AZ Alkmaar would put up on Malmö FF....

Cristiano Ronaldo Thinks He Knows Why You're Heckling Him, May Be Right
"I think that because I am rich, handsome and a great player people are envious of me. I don't have any other explanation." [Guardian]...

This Is The Kind Of Horrible Surgery NFL Players Will Go Through To Play
Tampa Bay's Brian Price has a congentially malformed pelvis, and last season he injured himself picking up a tennis ball. This is what he went through:...

Great Moments In NCAA Hypocrisy: How Penn State Defended Its Integrity, Seven Years After It Sold Out (Updated)
There is too much amazing material in Taylor Branch's Atlantic piece about the NCAA for us to handle it all at once, so we're just going to keep pulling shiny gems from the treasure trove whenever a new one catches our eye. So: The piece begins with a scene in 2001 where legendary shoe-company fixer...

This Evening: Let's Have A Look At Soccer's Latest Dive Of The Year Candidate
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 14, the day we learned more than we ever wanted to know about Michael Chabon. H/T to Sportpost for the video from the Japanese K League. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Chris Carpenter Was Not Pleased With Himself After Giving Up A Game-Tying Homer Last Night (Video)
The highlight shows Derrek Lee bouncing out harmlessly to end the inning, but Andrew McCutchen had belted a two-run homer on the previous at-bat to tie the game at 4 in the seventh. Golly, Carpenter's reaction is a heckuva lot worse than what Jaws said during Monday Night Football, even if it was ...

Alexandre Pato And Leo Messi Create Some Great Goals As AC Milan And Barcelona Kick Off The Champions League Season
Cracker of a match yesterday between AC Milan and Barcelona. Alexandre Pato turned on some otherworldly speed to score for MIlan just 24 seconds after kickoff (above). Then it was Leo Messi's turn (below, with other highlights). How Messi gets in that centering pass to Pedro for the Barcelona equa...

The Russian Backwater Samuel Eto'o Now Plays Soccer In Is Too Dangerous For Samuel Eto'o To Live In
Last month, Samuel Eto'o did something very curious and very venal and signed with Anzhi, an obscure team in Russia owned by a rich oil man. Eto'o became the highest paid soccer player in the world ($30 million over three years). But he also has to lace up his boots for Anzhi, which plays in a city ...

When The Flag Is Up, You May As Well Shoot For YouTube
Heerenveen midfielder Oussama Assaidi was offside, and he knew he was offside, so why not flick it home with a little flair? No goal, but a mess of style points....

Freak Out Even Mo-ah, Red Sox Fans: Tampa Bay Just Added The Minor Leagues' Best Pitcher To Its Bullpen
Tampa Bay Rays pitcher Matt Moore was 12-3, with a 1.82 ERA and 210 strikeouts (but only 46 walks) in 155 innings between Double-A and Triple-A this year. He was the runner-up to the Angels' Mike Trout for Baseball America's Minor League Player of the Year. Keith Law ranked him as the best pitching ...