cc Page 446 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Prodigal Son Returns, Kind Of
Former Gilroy High, San Jose State and San Francisco 49ers QB Jeff Garcia, 39, is now an Oakland Raider, and may challenge DeMarcus Russell for the starting role. Good one, Al. [San Francisco Chronicle]...
Soccer Player Receives Yellow Card For Farting
A Chorlton Villa footballer "broke wind" during a penalty kick and received a yellow card for his efforts. (And the other team got a re-kick.) When did they change the "he who smelt it" rule? [BBC]...
The Scottish Football Association Will Not Abide Your Pantomimed Oral Sex
The Scottish Football Association has banned players Barry Ferguson and Allan McGregor for making the shocking (SHOCKING!) hand gesture seen to your left. Who would've guessed the Scottish Football Association were such pussies? [Guardian]...
A Few Fun Facts About The Manatee CC Win Over The Pirates
First of all, they're calling it The Miracle On Grass; that's how big Manatee Junior College's 6-4 win over the Pittsburgh Pirates has become around Florida's Tampa-St. Pete area....
The Seattle Sounders Have Their First Sexual Assault Investigation
Here's an ad that was in the Seattle Times last month — and on the main page of its web site — featuring Seattle Sounders FC star forward Fredy Montero. Talk about unfortunate ad placement....
Just Some Of The Many Ways In Which America Is Ruining Soccer
"Yes, we blame you for the fact that our national stadium gives us few dining choices except stale hotdogs that cost the GDP of a small African nation." [The Spoiler]...
'Where's The Love?,' Asks Blogger Who Broke Green Death Email Story
Call this the story of how a Boston blogger broke the "Green Death Crazy Soccer Coach Email" story, yet somehow failed to get any credit for it....
Brave Woman Gives Eyewitness Testimony Of The Salisbury Cell Phone Incident
The Sean Salisbury cell phone saga has always seemed to me to be a lot like the legend of Bigfoot; shrouded in mystery, leaving large tracks but not much in the way of tangible proof....
John McCain To Save Jack Johnson's Honor
Former heavyweight champion Jack Johnson spent a year in jail for having sex with a white woman—who was also his wife—but a pardon sixty years after his death should make up for all that....
Massachusetts Girls Soccer Coach Resigns Over Hilarious, Possibly Insane Email
If George Patton had coached a girls soccer team, he probably would have run things this way; only without so many references to red meat. Meet Michael Kinahan, ex-coach of the Scituate, Mass. Green Death....
Pele "Debuted" With A "Lad"
In response to attacks about his coaching ability, Argentine coach Diego Maradona says soccer legend Pele lost his virginity to a man. [Goal.com]...
Brazilian Soccer Players Are Pretty In Pink
Here we have one Jairo, a midfielder for the Brazilian club Figueirense, who has ... wait a minute. Isn't it a little early to be rolling out the spring wardrobe?...
You Should See The Lingerie Department
Say that you're a low-level pro soccer player in Italy, and a fashion designer offers to let you live in a luxury apartment for free. One catch: It's in the storefront window of a boutique....
Everybody Loves The Underdog
Fulham are leading Manchester United 1-0 at halftime. I'm told this is unexpected, but that's what they get for benching Rooney and Tevez. Scholes was sent off in the 18th minute for being old. [ESPN]...
NCAA Tournament Live Blog: (1) Pittsburgh vs. (16) East Tennessee State
Your live blogger for this game will be Jeff Laughlin of And Here Come The Pretzels. Simpsons reference....
Seattle Finally Gets Something To Cheer For
The brand-new Seattle Sounders won the first game of their first season to kick off the year for Major League Soccer. They will be relocating to Austin in June. [Seattle Times; pic via]...
NCAA First Round: (1) Pittsburgh vs. (16) East Tennessee State
East Region: No. 1 Pittsburgh (28-4) vs. No. 16 East Tennessee State (23-10) When: Friday, 2:55 p.m., EDT Where: University of Dayton, Dayton, Ohio PITTSBURGH PANTHERS 1) Gary McGhee plays for Pitt. Well, kinda. I'll try and make this as objective as possible, but he might be the worst basketball ...
Major League Soccer Needs A Better Calendar
The MLS regular season begins Thursday. This Thursday. The one day of the year when even the most clueless sports fans will do unconscionable things to avoid thinking about anything non-basketball related. [ESPN]...
OK, What's With All The Lesbian Gym Teachers Around Here?
The shocking truth: There may be lesbian physical education teachers in San Francisco Bay Area high schools, and they're diddling with students. And according to one law enforcement official, it's technology's fault....