city Page 112 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Matt Cassel's Burden Is Heavier Than Anyone Imagined
Your morning roundup for Sept. 2, the day after we didn't have any change to toss into Bruce Springsteen's guitar case. Photo courtesy @IndianPacker, via @Sportsfeeder1. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Now Comes The District Of Columbia To Protest The Dumbassness Of Dan Snyder's Dumbass Libel Suit
It was always going to come to this. After being abused by Dan Snyder for over a decade, DC is finally fighting back. The city's Attorney General this week intervened in Snyder's increasingly desperate case against the Washington City Paper, arguing, more or less, that the wee Redskins owner is a ti...

Here's Chad McGhee With Your Weekly Knox City Greyhounds Update
As you probably already know, the Knox City Greyhounds lost their season opener to Crowell 47-36....

A Former Six Flags Employee Contributes To Our Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction
Consider this your daily link to Dave McKenna's "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," but here it is again for good measure. We'll post this until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit is dosed with a few micrograms of polonium-210. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna ...

Let's Hear It For The Guy Who Forwent Fantasy Draft Picks To Share This Aaron Rodgers Photobomb Shot
Mike D. of central Texas "let 2 picks go through its time limit in a fantasy draft to send this" picture of Clay Matthews photobombing Aaron Rodgers during the Colts/Packers preseason game....

Big Fan Chad McGhee Wants You Join Him To Watch The Knox City Greyhounds Reach For Football Immortality
Much has changed for Chad McGhee since he was hereby nominated for consideration as the biggest high-school football fan in the history of the game. ...

Confused Old Man On A Rascal Tries To Run Over Referee
A lively old man on a Rascal (also known as a wheelchair, mobility scooter, or Jazzy, depending on your local parlance) nearly took out a referee in a game between FC Oss and Almere City in the Netherlands on Friday night. Edwin van der Graaf reportedly handed out six yellow cards to Oss, the home...

Samir Nasri Will Not Score Until April
City closed the deal with their 40 million dollar man today, and to celebrate, they had EA Sports put together an image of Nasri scoring his first goal, using the upcoming FIFA 12. Nasri appears to have slipped past Vidic and a very out-of-position Rooney, and City fans probably cannot wait for this...

It's Bruce Chen's World, And We're All Just Renting Space
How's this for an unlikely sentence fragment? "Chen won four consecutive starts for the first time in his career..."...

Lil Wayne And Todd Haley Constitute Football's Newest And Maybe Worst Bromance
By and large, there's not a lot to like about Kansas City Chiefs head coach Todd Haley. He played golf, not football, in high school and college. His father was an NFL big shot. He's prone to tantrums. He rolled over some coordinators quickly. Whitlock hates him....

Let's Watch Some Ravens Fans Fight A Guy Who Roots For The Chiefs
Todd Haley will probably find this more offensive than the two late touchdowns the Ravens scored against his Chiefs. Or not. Either way, it's still a bunch of guys from Baltimore jumping someone. Thank God Omar ain't around to see such disrespect for the rules of the game....

Bucs DT Gerald McCoy Thinks Very Little Of Chiefs Backup Tyler Palko, Or Is It "Calabaloo," Maybe?
The Bill Belichick machine throttled Tampa Bay last night. It was 28-0 at the half, Brady and Ochocinco clicking like they were young lovers. But Buccaneers defensive tackle Gerald McCoy saw the whole thing as a learning experience, although not an experience to learn the prior opposing quarterback'...

Announcer Is Sorry His "One-Eyed Jimmy" "Just Came Out"
In the most MLS injury ever, Jimmy Neilsen, the Danish goalkeeper for Sporting Kansas City, was hit in the eye with a flying Omar Bravo bobblehead last night. He laid on the pitch for about four minutes, got stitched up, and returned to play in a 3-1 win over Portland....

This Guy May Be The Biggest High School Football Fan In The History Of The Game
This is divalover159's "shout out to the knox city greyhounds." And "this is the team of the Knox city greyhounds." They're a high-school football team from Texas. They play a scrimmage tomorrow night. Good luck, divalover159. Your time is now. Your time is here....

The Hidden Message Of This Girl In A Royals Visor Giving A Ball To Some Kid In A Jeter Shirtsey
Here's how MLB captioned the above video, which appears heartwarming and nurturing and fuzzy and cherubic: "Young Royals fan in pigtails gives foul ball to young Yankees fan not in pigtails."...

We Are All Dave McKenna CLXXXIX
Blame me, the fucking new guy, but this should have been in this morning's Wake Up Deadspin feature, as it has been pretty much every other day. Anyway, here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting every day until Snyder's du...

Kyle Davies's Year Goes From Worst To Worster
Kind of a shitty week for Kyle Davies. He went on the disabled list. Wednesday he was cut by the Royals. And now it turns out he was arrested the day before, for disorderly intoxication....

The Kansas City Royals Tarp Crew Is More Entertaining Than The Kansas City Royals
Speed and agility are probably not absolute requirements for employment on the Kansas City grounds crew, but they may come in handy during life- and pride-threatening situations such as this one. Grace, however, does not seem to be in high demand....

Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part VI: Robot Surrogates And The Abyss
Consider this your daily link to Dave McKenna's "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," but here it is again for good measure. We'll post this mother until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit is frozen in amber so humans of the future can study the behavior of assholes in the 21st century. (For tho...

Dan Snyder Is Now Campaigning Against The Rights Of D.C. Residents To Govern Themselves
Dan Snyder's lawyers yesterday filed a brief in D.C. Superior Court as part of Snyder's dumbass legal jihad against the Washington City Paper. Snyder's lawsuit looks for all the world like a "strategic lawsuit against public participation." Even the ACLU thinks so. Such "SLAPP" suits are deployed by...