classic Page 13 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Stripper's Guide To The Final Four
During the 2007 Final Four, I traveled to Atlanta with a couple of friends to dance at the Pink Pony. We were surprised to find the local dancers questioning why the dancer manager was urging them to work all weekend, then do it again next weekend during the Masters. By the Sunday before the final, ...

Dana Jacobson Has The Sole Appropriate Reaction To The Mike And Mike Roast (Deadspin Classic)
Dana Jacobson is reportedly leaving ESPN. Four years ago, she gave us one of our favorite moments. Originally published Jan. 14, 2008....

Dead Wrestler Of The Week: Yokozuna (Deadspin Classic)
The WWE revealed on Tuesday that it will induct the late Yokozuna (born Rodney Anoa'i) into its Hall of Fame. In 2010, our Dead Wrestler of the Week column paid tribute to the big man. Originally published April 23, 2010....

The Beards Of Summer: Remembering The Days When A Barnstorming Cult Ruled Baseball
Chris Siriano wants to get the hell out of Michigan. Even on a gorgeous fall day in Addison (population 627), with the leaves turning and the sun bright, Siriano—middle-aged, sporting a gray goatee and ball cap—can't stop dreaming about the beach. "I raised my daughter by myself and everybody knew t...

Excerpts From The Long-Lost Script For <em>Monday Night Football: The Cartoon</em>
So total at the time was Cosell's saturation of culture that Irwin Weiner, an ABC Sports vice president for twenty years, once came up with a concept for a Saturday morning kids' series called "Monday Night Football: The Cartoon", one that would turn Cosell, Gifford and Meredith into animated charac...

Deadspin Classic: ESPN Nixes Bill Simmons-Barack Obama Podcast
Bill Simmons recently sat down with President Obama for his podcast, which is up now on Grantland (and which has already spawned a delightful hashtag on Twitter). The last time the two were supposed to talk, ESPN ruined everything. Originally published April 16, 2008....

Tiger Woods Does Not Want To Discuss Whether He Wanted To Be A Navy SEAL
Golf Digest published some excerpts yesterday from Hank Haney's upcoming book about his time as Tiger Woods's coach, and the part everybody's talking about is the portion that alleges Tiger "seriously considered" leaving golf to be a Navy SEAL....

Confessions Of A Fan Photographer: The Abyss Gazes Back!
Republished with permission from The Classical....

Here's A Video Of Dogs Saying "I Love You"
Originally published Feb. 14, 2011....

Duncan Siemens Rides The Bus: On The Loneliness Of The Long-Distance Minor-League Bus Rider
Republished with permission from The Classical. Art by Eli Neugeboren....

20 Rules For Your Super Bowl Party
Originally published Jan. 29, 2009....

"Cut Back To A Wide Shot. Open The Skull": The <em>Faces Of Death</em> Guy Looks Back
John Alan Schwartz was on a California beach, trying to capture something life-affirming on camera. Or something that at least would contrast with death. He had a woman and a baby in a hot tub. This was going to be the final scene of his 1978 movie Faces of Death—a low-budget stunt project that wo...

Pat Burrell Is Retiring, But "The Machine" Just Might Live On
MLB Trade Rumors had it first, and noted rich guy Jon Heyman confirmed on Twitter: Pat Burrell is retiring. The thumping, lumbering outfielder posted a .253/.361/.472 line in 12 MLB seasons, most of them with the Phillies. He had ranked 25th among active players in home runs. He won two World Series...

A Chronicle Of Doing It: Nike And Destruction
Republished with permission from The Classical....

Deadspin Archives: Brent Musburger Offers Some Troubling News About Joe Paterno
In October 2008, before most of the world knew anything about Jerry Sandusky, Brent Musburger was a guest on the Dan Patrick Show and offered a now seemingly prophetic glimpse into what kept Joe Paterno going. Originally published October 15, 2008....

Bud Selig Can't Hear You: A Gallery
In honor of Commissioner for Life Bud Selig's new contract, we give you this metaphorically rich gallery, which we first ran in September 2010. ...

The Homer In Winter: In Defense Of Tommy Heinsohn
Republished with permission from The Classical. Illustration by Jacob Weinstein....

Baseball's Hall Of Fame Voters Are Irrational, But Not For The Reasons You Think
Last year, Bert Blyleven, the former Twins right-hander whose Hall of Fame candidacy was long a cause among the stathead community, got into Cooperstown on his 14th ballot. But was it really a triumph of rational thinking or merely the product of a different kind of irrationality? We revisit what we...

Of Course Flyers And Rangers Fans Brawled Outside Of Geno's Steaks After The Winter Classic
Writes tipster Kenneth Brock, "I was debating on even sending this to y'all. Born and raised in Philly, breathe the city and its sports teams. We get a bad enough rap as is through the national media. Goddamn snowballs at Santa. Wasn't even a twinkle in my parents eye when that bullshit went down....

At The Winter Classic, A New Year Belongs To Gary Bettman
PHILADELPHIA—These are supposed to be the treasured memories of the NHL's Winter Classic: Star-crossed Brayden Schenn's first career goal. Mike Rupp's mocking Jagr salute after his first score. Henrik Lundqvist stoning a penalty shot for the game. But they're transient memories, already fading....