da Page 1151 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Erick Dampier Should Not Think Out Loud
"Every time [Tony Parker] drives the lane, we have to put him on his back....My first foul Thursday night is going to put him on his back. I guarantee it." [Dallas Morning News]...

Andrew Bynum Continues To Pad His Resume: He's Now Dating Rihanna?
The Lakers' big man is rumored to be dating the recently disentangled singer Rihanna.. [The Big Lead]...

But Pirates Are So Popular Right Now
"The paid attendance of 8,790 was the sixth-smallest in PNC Park history, the smallest having been 8,201 from the April, 25, 2007. Actual turnstile count was roughly 4,500." [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, TwoBigBoobs]...

"Moneyball" Casting Department Seeking Undervalued Actors
The cast of Steven Soderbergh's ridiculous Moneyball adaptation is starting to come together and it looks to be about as awesome as a dramatic feature about sabermetrics could possibly be....

Druggie NFL Prospects Not Actually On Drugs
Remember all the fuss recently about certain draft prospects who tested positive for drugs at the scouting combine and how it made everyone sad for today's youth? Yeah, none of those guys actually tested positive....

University of Miami Students Bristle Over No. 1 Party School Ranking
''I've been to the University of Michigan and that UM is crazy...[W]e rarely have parties on campus. We just go to ones that are more exclusive.'' [Miami Herald]...

Heavyweight David Haye Prefers Subtlety In His Wardrobe Choices
How to make headlines at a German boxing press conference: wear a t-shirt emblazoned with a cartoonish version of yourself holding up the bloody heads of the Klitschko brothers. [Josh Q. Public]...

Patriots' Day Gives Boston A Reason To Feel Special For Once
On this day, 342 years ago, a group of bloodthirsty Welsh mercenaries attacked defenseless Pilgrims with boiling tea kettles, winning the War of 1812 so that Boston could have day baseball on a Monday....

The Most Interesting Spring Football Game Commentary You'll Ever Hear
Radio station Rock 104 live-streamed the Southern Miss Golden Eagles game for its hometown fans on Saturday, but those tuning in received something else entirely: Hillbilly sex talk, belching, and the N-word....

Lies, Damned Lies, And Swimsuit Issues
Sports Illustrated publishes a fake letter to the editor about their Swimsuit Issue and the world nearly explodes. You know....I think some of those Penthouse Forum stories might be slightly embellished as well. [Cleveland Frowns]...

Sidney Crosby Gets The Philadelphia Salute; Deadspin Almost Falls Apart
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Sean Astin Is "Rudy." Now and Forever
Maybe you've heard of a little story called "Lord Of The Rings." He was in all three of those too, you know! Sheesh. [Journal Gazette]...

On Juiced Balls and Homer-Happy Yankee Stadium
Earlier today, Ryan Garko sent an A.J. Burnett fastball in the direction of Bear Mountain, the 19th homer in four games at the giant ATM known as Yankee Stadium. Is this "Coors Field East"?...

Breaking: Some Sports Franchises More Equal Than Others
"Don't get me wrong I love America," a reader writes. Whatever Wen Ho, think I don't get my fill of pinkos whining about Fox over at Torture Points Memo?...

Chicago: Just Lucky? Or Something More Sinister?
The world probably believes it is witnessing what the sociologist Robert K. Merton calls a "self-fulfilling prophecy." But are we ignoring a blatant conflict-of-interest in the city that gave us Rod Blagojevich?...

You Should Wikipedia Kevin Garnett Sometime, He's A Fascinating Fellow
I actually did know who Kevin Garnett was before today. In fact, we talked one time. It was a conference call though, lacking in intimacy. Those were the days before you could Wikipedia helpful icebreakers....

Penguins Fans Are Not At All Desperate, Hard Up For Dates
For some of you ladies, your dream may be to marry a handsome millionaire in the Bahamas. For others, it may be a magical date with a Penguins fan on Dollar Night at Mellon Arena....

The Dislike For Carl Pavano Was Closed-Captioned For The Hearing Impaired
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap More...

Danny Ainge Suffers Heart Attack, Is Expected To Recover
Former Celtics star and current director of basketball operations Danny Ainge was taken to a Boston hospital today after suffering a "minor heart attack." [WBZ-TV]...

Oy! Jets Schedule Conflicts With High Holidays
All that kvetching and gnashing of teeth you hear is because Jewish New York Jets fans may have to miss a quarter of their team's home games due to an NFL scheduling mixup....