da Page 1285 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Boy, The Heat Sure Look Done Already
As Free Darko pointed out, last night's Mavericks-Heat game was hardly one they'll be showing off on NBA TV in a week. The Mavericks dominated the whole way, and as little fun as it is to pronounce a series over before they even switch venues, it kind of looks like the Heat might be done....
Rileyball To Rear Its Ugly Head
Well, here we go. Pat Riley, shown above after being asked about the size of Shaquille O'Neal's penis, has made clear his intention to ugly up the NBA Finals. They're going to roll with a little more "Rileyball," which is, of course, another term for ugly basketball. For examples, see any of the ...
Federer Remains Nadal's Bitch
Rafael Nadal further cemented his place as the world's greatest athlete in capri pants by beating Roger Federer in the finals of the French Open this morning, 1-6, 6-1, 6-4, 7-6 (4). And in celebration, not settling for a simple kiss of the French Open trophy, he attempted to perform fellatio on it....
Favre, Jeter, Kobe, Barry... All Your Favorites
Harris Interactive conducts a poll every year to determine America's favorite athletes. Michael Jordan has occupied the top spot every year since 1993, but this year, Tiger Woods shoved him out of there like Bryon Russel, and Tiger took MJ's top spot. I guess the people of America really loved tha...
Let's Get French For A Second
Justine Henin-Hardenne beat Svetlana Kuznetsova 6-4, 6-4 this morning to win her third Freedom French Open, and her second in a row. It is the fifth Grand Slam win of her career....
Terrell Owens, Symbol For The Youth
You know, this is the NBA Finals, the World Cup, the start of some obviously exciting baseball pennant races and, of course, ant soccer. One would think it would be our one Terrell Owens-free time of the year....
The Closer: Escape From New York
Notes from a day in baseball:...
Mark Cuban's Courtside Blogging Madness
Last night's NBA Finals Game 1 Mavericks victory over the Heat was an impressive one, and a fun one to watch; we feel optimistic about the series as a whole. (Though a scary part inside us keeps whispering nasty matters about a sweep.)...
So ... We've Got Some Affidavit Names
Everyone's guessing about who the blacked-out names in the Jason Grimsley report are, and it has been a fun parlor game so far. But we all knew eventually the names would get out. And we've been digging around ... and some sources have given us some names....
NBA Finals Pants Party: Mavericks Vs. Heat
We all used to complain that the NBA playoffs took too long to finish, that there were too many games, that it was just all too much. Now, the complaints are about having to wait too long for the Finals to start. Yeah, we'd call that progress....
Introducing Your World Cup Closer
Joining us on our World Cup Blog team, starting Tuesday, will be David Hirshey, known both as "one of America's leading soccer experts" (Soccer America) and "an insufferable soccer poet" (Tony Kornheiser). We're honored to have him penning the World Cup Daily Closer throughout the tournament....
The Closer: Man In The Iron Mask
Notes from a day in baseball:...
Defending Mr. Cooper
So we've been thinking about the $500,000 bond required of the victimized Mike Cooper, and we did a little search through Google News for some comparisons....
Careful Where You Buy Your Tickets
A helpful reminder for anyone thinking of buying some scalped tickets for Thursday's NBA Finals, from our friends at The Consumerist: Beware, buyers....
Carl Monday Will Have You Locked In Jail With The Key Thrown Away
A commenter brought this up yesterday, but we still cannot believe it: Mike Cooper, the 23-year-old dreamer with the sad misfortune of unleashing his lonely penis within a four-mile radius of Carl Monday, is being held on $500,000 bond after his arrest for indecency charges. You heard that correct...
The Closer: Yankees; Dangerous When Wounded
Notes from a day in baseball:...
Michael Irvin Brings The Love
What is love, exactly? What is it that brings people together, two become one, living in the sacred state of holy matrimony? (Well, as long as it's not two dudes, anyway.)...
Mark Cuban's Self Diagnosis
We would like to formally congratuate the Dallas Mavericks and their owner, the billion-dollar penised Mark Cuban, for their convincing Western Conference clinching victory Friday evening. The Mavericks have been the most consistently enjoyable team to watch this postseason, and we are pleased to ...
The Closer: The Cubs; Good For What Ails Ya
Notes from a day in baseball:...