da Page 927 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Red Sox Player Mutiny Now Kelly Shoppach's Fault Somehow
The New York Daily News features a screamer of a headline this morning: "Adrian Gonzalez off the hook as NY Mets' Kelly Shoppach takes fall for Boston's text mutiny." Oh, weird! I guess, contrary to the report from Yahoo, it was not "Adrian Gonzalez, texting on behalf of himself and some teammates,"...
Man Dives Into Kauffman Stadium Fountain For Adam Dunn's 400th Home Run, Is Arrested
Adam Dunn blasted his 400th home run last night into the fountains at Kauffman Stadium. One industrious and, judging by his jersey, long time Chicago White Sox fan decided to retrieve the ball from its watery grave....
Announcer Says Cowboys WR Cole Beasley Is "Unbeas-lievable," Cole Beasley Vomits
Despite the sickening pun, Cole Beasley finished the game with seven catches for 104 yards. He also threw up a lot. Beasley says it was no big deal, he just got the wind knocked out of him on a hit and he landed on the ball. He also says he throws up a lot....
Somebody Threw A Shoe At Danica Patrick's Car And Knocked Her Out Of A Race She Was Leading
"Something's fucked up" is all Danica Patrick could muster after leading much of today's NASCAR Nationwide tour race at Montreal then being knocked out by a mechanical issue after running over a shoe thrown onto the track by a spectator....
Joe Paterno: "I'm Not Omniscient!"
Joe Posnanski's book on Joe Paterno will be released next week (and includes the quote from Bill James you see above), but various members of the media have obtained a copy. Among other things, the book reveals that Joe Paterno had to be coerced into reading the grand jury presentment by his family ...
Mets Identity Crisis Continues
First it was the return of Jerry Manuel and his weirdo aloof disposition to the Mets. Now, according to the Mets twitter feed, longtime Texas Ranger David Murphy is hitting RBI singles for the team while actual New York Met Daniel Murphy is lost somewhere looking for a position to play. At least th...
Your <em>Expendables 2</em> Power Rankings
The Expendables 2 has 11 names on its poster only because there is not room, either in poster space or running time, for 47. It is New Years Eve with testicles. It is the turducken of action movies. Rather than review the film, I thought I'd just rank those 11 names, in ascending order of Expendable...
Who Is The World's Most Recognizable Athlete?
Saw this photo over at TBJ, of Kobe Bryant making an appearance on his annual Nike tour of China, and it's no surprise. China loves Kobe. Loves him. That's a billion people who go nuts at the very sight of Bryant, a global superstar for 15 years now. It got me thinking: who's the most recognizable a...
Here Are A Bunch Of MLB Players Doing Funny Impressions Of <em>The Expendables</em> Cast
Allow me to self-plagiarize for a moment. A few members of the Deadspin staff, myself included, once went to the MLB Fan Cave. It was in many ways a soul-crushing place, where the Pepsi Max (but no other variety of Pepsi) was bottomless, and where Jeff Nelson was just hanging out, likely against his...
Horrible New Uniforms Mean Notre Dame Can Finally Compete With The Marylands Of The World
Here, courtesy reader @bobbyleecoy, are the uniforms Notre Dame will wear when the Fighting Irish lose to Miami in Chicago on Oct. 6. And while I'm a Notre Dame hater like the rest of you, even I can't begin to process the sartorial insult these things are to the school's decaying football tradition...
Tim Tebow Finds Out News About Himself Via ESPN
As you’ve probably heard, GQ used old photos of Tim Tebow for one of its September covers (Cam Newton has the other). Tebow didn’t agree to sit for a shoot, so they went to the archives, and voila, there’s a September cover. (N.B.: For anyone complaining about this—Mike Florio is particularly worked...
Who Owns Team USA: Nike Wins The Olympic Gold Medal Count
It's been 20 years since the Dream Team's Michael Jordan, Charles Barkley, and Magic Johnson showed the world which loyalties truly matter at the Olympics, wrapping themselves in the American flag on the gold-medal podium to cover up the Reebok logo on their warmups. So here in 2012, the United Sta...
Red Sox Player Mutiny Continues Apace
Injured pitchers two-fisting around the clubhouse! Stabbing the manager in the back! Fans who can't even mourn Johnny Pesky with their pants up! Can it possibly get any worse for those fourth-place Boston Red Sox?...
Woman Who Sat For A While On A Hot Bench Outside Cowboys Stadium Now Suing Jerry Jones
How long were you on this planet before you realized that hot things hurt, and you shouldn't touch them? A few months? A year or two, tops? So when you see a black marble bench, baking in a summer Texas sun on a 101-degree day, maybe you think, hey, it's probably hot, I shouldn't sit there. And even...
Posnanski: "No, I Don't Feel About Joe Paterno The Same Way I Did When I Started Writing The Book"
But what exactly has changed with Joe Posnanski's thinking? Doesn't say. We're five days away from the release of the former Sports Illustrated star's Joe Paterno biography, and Posnanski took the opportunity to justify the book in a USA Today column today:...
Finally, Batman Meets USC With "Bane Kiffin"
You guys! I finally saw The Dark Knight Rises this weekend, so I totally get all the memes now. Here's a series with promise: Lane Kiffin, rocking the facegear, saying Laney/Baney things. [Bane Kiffin]...
Here's What The Scorecard From Felix Hernandez's Perfect Game Looks Like
Dave Sims, who called a fantastic game today for Root Sports, fully embracing the fact that Felix Hernandez was on his way to history and eschewing any ridiculous notions of superstition during the telecast, just posted a photo of his scorecard, and it's astonishing to see. The three boxes (and no m...
Let's Save Jesse Eisenberg's Career
It hasn't been a good week for Jesse Eisenberg. On Sunday, when the cameras caught him watching Team USA's gold medal win over Spain, the broadcasters thought he was actually Mark Zuckerberg. On Wednesday, he "contributed" an "essay" to Dave Eggers' "90 Days, 90 Reasons" site that couldn't have made...
The 10 Rules Of Pimping, As Written By An Actual (Alleged) Pimp
Steven McDaniel, of Long Island, NY, was arrested and charged today with running a prostitution and heroin ring. Among the items seized by police was a handwritten list of the "Rule's 2 Da Game of Hoez!!!" Thanks to the Smoking Gun, we proudly present that list, quite sic'd....