dan Page 275 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jordan Demands Your Rapt Attention!
We haven't heard from Michael Jordan in a while, and Michael Jordan doesn't like it when we haven't heard from him in a while. In a "wide-ranging" interview with "60 Minutes" — for Jordan, "wide-ranging" interviews basically mean there's no actual fellatio shown on screen — Jordan talks to the unf...
Dan Dickau Loses A Potential Best Pal
The kids over at Yay!Sports have this fun game they've decided to play with chats with NBA players on NBA.com: They ask them : "Freestyle a bit for us and I'll be your best friend." (The bit is derived from an actual question to LeBron James in an AOL chat; apparently the joke made him "LOL" so ha...
Another Freaking GM Who Doesn't Need To Shave
Honestly, at some point, we're gonna end up seeing baseball owners sitting at the bedroom window of high school Strat-o-Matic games, wearing sun visors, peering through binoculars and feverishly scribbling in a notebook. After Rangers general manager John Hart resigned yesterday, the team hired 28...
Jose Canseco, Professional Wrestler (Of Course)
We're not even going to pretend to be surprised here: Jose Canseco is rumored to making an appearance at Wrestlemania this spring. Perhaps it is telling that the people who are most concerned about this development are not baseball fans, but wrestling fans. Seems like the WWE — remember, that's wh...
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 9 a.m.: Dan Shanoff's Morning Quickie: After actually having met you, we have to say that this tragically titled feature couldn't be creepier. • 1:30 p.m. Sugar Shane Mosley: OK, HBO on Saturday. Your fight, or rerun of The Sopranos? H...
The Most Loathsome Talking Head of Them All
An enterprising young Atlanta Braves blogger, truly a guy after our own hearts, had become exhausted with screaming at his television set every time he turned on ESPN. As a way to rage against the machine, he set up The Road From Bristol, a 64-person bracket meant to resolve, once and for all, who...
Michael Jordan Freaks Charles Barkley
We know this has been on the Web for a while, but still ......
ESPN Trims SportsCenter Fat
In case you were having difficulty spreading out your hate among all the SportsCenter anchors, take heart: They're making it more concentrated for you. In a move that had been anticipated, ESPN announced yesterday that it's going to three two-man teams. And "two-man teams" is accurate too; it's al...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while writing a musical based on the movie "Fargo" ... • Puberty — nature's steroids. Hawaii wins Little League World Series. • Speaking of steroids: Giambi's 7 RBI lift Yankees. • Danica Patrick proves that women drivers are just as capable as men when it comes to ... wait, she just...
Road From Bristol Enters Final Four
Time for an update from The Road From Bristol, the 64-"team" tournament allowing voters to choose the most loathsome ESPN personality. We're still awaiting results of Dan LeBatard vs. Tony Reali matchup to select the last of the Final Four. But the winners so far:...
Shapiro Finally Sets ESPN And Viewers Free
It's official: ESPN overlord Mark Shapiro is leaving the network to run Redskins midget Daniel Snyder's bid to take over the Six Flags franchise. (His last day is October 1. Rest assured, you'll be hearing from him — and us — a ton.)...
Michael Jordan Gets His Beavis On
Gambling legend Michael Jordan is in hot water (get it!) with the Santa Barbara fire department. Jordan is wanted for questioning related to a forest fire last week. A spokesperson says Jordan is not believed to be responsible for the fire but "he would know who is involved."...
F1 CEO Proves To Best Cro-Magnon Boss In The Business
Until about a week ago, you'd probably never heard of Bernie Ecclestone. This is because you're probably an American, and you don't pay any attention to Formula One Racing, the organization Ecclestone is the president and CEO of. A friend of ours who knows Formula One much better than we do says E...
OK, We Pick, Uh, Jordan, Magic And Bird. Oh, And Ahmad Rashad
MJ, Bird, Magic To Help Select Olympic Team [Associated Press]...
Bidding For Danica
We find it encouraging that a female athlete could be a part of a bidding war — and Playboy isn't involved at all. Word has started to rumble (can word "rumble?") that Nascar could make a play for young Danica. She'd certainly have to sing at Wrigley "Stadium" better than Jeff Gordon did....
Fat Drivers Whine
Last week, before the Indianapolis 500, Nascar dolt Robby Gordon said it was unfair that Danica Patrick was so light, saying she had a natural advantage for speed, being so spindly. We found this amusing, because once we find the one advantage women have over men in the world of sports, some idiot...
For Background Purposes, Honest
Just in case you thought Danica Patrick was a brand new phenomenon, FHM proudly proclaims that it had pictures of her months ago. So we link them to you, for research purposes. We missed the Rusty Wallace spread; our subscription to Beer Gut just ran out....
Danica Mania: The Aftermath
Like a lot of people, we were on the couch Sunday, cheering on Danica Patrick — and, perhaps even more so, David Letterman — at the Indianapolis 500. A friend of ours was asking us the other day, perplexed, whether or not we found Danica Patrick physically attractive; we said that he was wrong to ...
How To Become Famous? Retire
SportsBusiness Journal — which we actually subscribe to, even though it pretty much requires a second mortgage — gives its yearly Q ratings of the popularity of top athletes. (The rating measures how the general public recognizes people. And athletes are people too, apparently.) The site's subscr...