day Page 66 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Watch This Bonkers <em>Universal Soldier</em> Sequel, But Skip The First Scene
Universal Soldier, you may remember, was a blast of pure 1992 cheese in which Jean-Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren play reanimated Vietnam super-soldiers who fight each other. It was pretty good! It was, in fact, the only pretty good movie ever made by German director Roland Emmerich, and its su...
Lil Baby Bear Has Itself A Good-Ass Time On A Golf Course
This bear is both cool and good. This bear is just hanging out on a golf green when it suddenly notices the flag pin. Oh. Oh damn. What's going on with this flag thing over here? ...
Bud Light Apple-Ahhh-Rita Is Bullshit; Drink Cider Instead
A couple of summers ago, Anheuser-Busch introduced the abominable Bud Light Lime-a-Rita, sweet fake-citrus bullshit intended to capitalize on the niche market of people who have spent their entire lives not knowing what an actual lime tastes like. Those sad bastards are still none the wiser, which h...
Yesterday's Hero
Let's take time out from the distressing state of modern football for this melancholy portrait of Bob Suffridge by the great Paul Hemphill:...
Stop Whining About Pumpkin Beer
We the people like to complain about every damn thing in the world, and for some strange reason, we've settled on pumpkin beer as one of the things to complain about the most. The stuff sells outrageously well, and in so doing serves as a gateway beer guiding people out of the macro cooler, even if ...
ESPN's Dilfer, Berman Praise NFL In Ridiculous Recap Of Ray Rice Case
Tonight's the worst night of the NFL season, the one evening ESPN capitulates to Chris Berman's demand and puts him on a Monday Night Football telecast. Berman tried to discuss the Ray Rice fiasco with analyst Trent Dilfer, and the entire thing was a disaster....
Lagunitas Sucks Is America's Finest Quart Of Beer
One of these days I'm going to write about 40s—it would be irresponsible to forever ignore one of the most iconic corners of American beer culture—but I keep putting it off, because I can't find a worthwhile angle beyond nostalgia. Most of your better brewers opt not to package their wares in 40-oun...
Jimmy Johnson Is Possessed By A Demon
How do you spell the noise he is making?...
Anchor California Lager: Because Ale Makes You Fat
You're getting chubby, and that's mostly because you spend all day looking at slideshows of the "27 Fried-est Foods at the Iowa Tractor Guild's Annual Corn Jousting Festival," which makes you shake your damn head at all those crazy, fat maize warriors and their deep-fried mutton cupcakes as you sm...
The <em>College Gameday</em> Curse Is Real... For Some Teams
The college football season is underway, and with it, the 28th season of ESPN's pregame show, College Gameday. With it also, the College Gameday curse, or at least rumors of its existence....
Tröegs Perpetual IPA: Always Good, Sometimes Better
Informed citizens tend to blame Budweiser for most of society's ills, and justifiably so. Between the doltish marketing, crummy beer, and thousands of lives lost every year in catastrophic avalanches of Clydesdale shit, it's tempting to call for the company's immediate disbandment, or at least exi...
Townsfolk Embark On Thrilling Mission To Remove Bucket From Bear's Head
For weeks, the people of Perry Township, Penn., had been crossing paths with a black bear that had its head stuck in a plastic bucket. The bear became known as Bucket Bear, and the townspeople's concerns became so great that they made a Facebook page dedicated to saving Bucket Bear from his bucket, ...
Pabst Blue Ribbon: It's Not Just For Hipsters Anymore, And Never Was
I've only blocked a couple of people on Twitter, because the Internet has generally deemed me unworthy of harassment, but if I were a more prominent person or dealt with a more controversial subject, I would toss motherfuckers overboard by the dozen. I do not interpret the First Amendment as guara...
A Striker For You! Another For You!: Your Transfer Deadline Day Roundup
Another crazy transfer deadline has came and went, and after a couple tense hours of waiting, it appears most of the biggest moves, like Radamel Falcao to Manchester United, were squeezed under before the curtain fell. Here's a recap of the biggest moves completed yesterday:...
Dogfish Head Indian Brown Ale: Making Delaware Relevant Since 1999
There are two big breweries within a couple miles of my house—the headquarters of both Harpoon and the Boston Beer Company (Samuel Adams)—but I've never been on the official tour at either place. That's stupid. I like brewery tours, and I've been to a bunch of smaller, less convenient places; I've...
Here Is Your Emergency Labor Day Menu
Look, anyone could forget about Labor Day. Right? This is what you tell yourself, rocketing homeward from the empty workplace it took you many long minutes to recognize is closed today and why—Oh god, is everybody coming over for a cookout? Did I tell them I'd host Labor Day? Oh god did I prom...
Stone Cold! Stone Cold! Stone Cold!
Steve Austin dropped by the College GameDay set this morning and did typically Stone Cold things....
Watch College Football Coaches Read And Respond To Mean Tweets
We've enjoyed Jimmy Kimmel's gimmick of having various celebrities and athletes read mean tweets about themselves, and the good times have continued today when College GameDay borrowed the idea. Hey, college football coaches aren't humorless tight-asses all the time!...
Here Are Two Of The Dumbest <em>GameDay</em> Signs You'll Ever See
The above picture, preserved by SB Nation, shows a startlingly large number of peppy Oklahoma State kids posing behind one of the stupidest GameDay signs we've seen—which itself is saying something. Don't they teach you kids nothin'?...
Goose Island Honker's Ale: Not Bad, For Sellouts
Goose Island has been making outstanding beer for the good and other people of Chicago since 1988. The rest of us have been able to get our hands on it for a long time, too; it was also was one of the first American craft breweries to hit the big time. This is because it was a well-run small busin...