dc Page 166 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The United States Cap-Tied Two Very Good Dual Nationals Last Night
The United States started off their World Cup Qualifying campaign in St. Louis last night with a 6-1 win against Caribbean minnows St. Vincent and the Grenadines. The result was as expected and there’s nothing substantial to be gleaned from how the team played, aside from the fact that they allowed ...
Why Are Hot Takers Truthering The Missouri Fiasco?
Missouri is playing a football game this Saturday night—a game that was recently put in jeopardy by the ongoing firestorm at the school. It’s a big ol’ shitshow that promises to get messier before it gets cleaner, with potential strikes, ousted chancellors, professors begging for muscle (coming righ...
Hard Cider Smackdown: Woodchuck Vs. Angry Orchard Vs. Your Sense Of Shame
Try to recall the events toward the middle-end of 2000’s Castaway, when Tom Hanks is making his triumphant return to U.S. soil. Rather than that weird company party in the airport broom closet or whatever it was, imagine instead that he was treated to an all-expenses-paid trip to the grocery store a...
The iTunes Terms And Conditions Makes A Great Graphic Novel
When iTunes hits you with their Terms and Conditions, you click “accept” and move on. It would take you a very, very long time to actually, you know, read it like you’re supposed to. But artist R. Sikoryak has come up with an easier, more enjoyable way to absorb it....
President Of German Soccer Association Resigns Amid World Cup Bribery Scandal
DFB President Wolfgang Niersbach has resigned from his post today. While he’s maintained his and his organization’s innocence amid allegations that German soccer officials bought votes in order to win World Cup hosting rights in 2006, Niersbach has decided to take “political responsibility” for the ...
Timofey Mozgov Hit First Cleveland Three-Pointer
Timofey Mozgov is strongest, also largest. Mozgov dunk; Mozgov rebound; Mozgov block shot. But Mozgov is not oaf! Mozgov have skill. Mozgov shoot three!...
Will Manny Pacquiao's Final Opponent Be Revealed Tonight?
The week in boxing news was dominated by a fighter who isn’t even currently in training: Manny Pacquiao. Even after an uninspired and perhaps compromised performance against Floyd Mayweather, Pacquiao remains the biggest, most marketable name in the sport. And the race to be Pacquiao’s next foe—in w...
LeBron James And Kevin Love Have Resolved Their Beef
Remember those subtweets, stilted interviews, and posed Instagram pictures that had a lot of people wondering if there was a rift between LeBron James and Kevin Love last year? Well, according to the Akron Beacon Journal, there was indeed some fire behind all that smoke....
Will Kobe Bryant Survive This Season?
The early part of the NBA season has been defined by a torrent of incredible Steph Curry highlights and an alternate, uglier torrent of Kobe Bryant lowlights, wherein the Lakers superstar is hopelessly air-balling shot after shot as his teammates—still regarded by Kobe as mere assistants—look on hel...
Romanian Youth Coach Beats On 16-Year-Old Player In The Middle Of A Game
This, uh, doesn’t seem like the best way to motive your U17 charges?...
David Cross Parodies "Know Your Rights" Videos With Keegan-Michael Key
In preview of David Cross and Bob Odenkirk’s new Netflix sketch series With Bob and David, they’ve released a clip which parodies the “Know Your Rights” videos. If you haven’t seen them, the series is a YouTube staple that features various ways with which to engage with law enforcement, and are ofte...
Idiot On The Field Invades Pitch At MLS Playoff Match, Gets Sacked
A lot of idiots have made their appearances at RFK Stadium, but it was one Idiot whose pitch invasion interrupted today’s D.C. United-New York Red Bulls and led to the hooligan getting sacked—in the American football sense of the term....
#67 Goes 77 Yards For SEC-Sized Fat Guy Touchdown
300 lb. Kentucky defensive lineman Cory Johnson opened the scoring of tonight’s Vols-Wildcats matchup in Lexington by scooping up a fumble and rumbling 77 yards. He was motorin’!...
Great Moments In Kentucky Football
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Boomer Esiason Says Jets Swept Locker Room For Bugs Before Pats Game, Is Probably Full Of Shit
Former NFL quarterback Boomer Esiason stirred some shit on his daily radio show this morning when he claimed that the Jets asked the NFL to sweep the visiting locker room for bugs before their Oct. 25 away game against the Patriots. That was quite a bomb for Esiason to drop, but it was probably bull...
Gus Johnson Has A Sense Of Humor About His Failed Stint Announcing Soccer
When Fox won the rights to broadcast the 2018 and 2022 World Cups, they embarked on an ambitious plan: Gus Johnson—the broadcaster mostly known for his Gusgasms during March Madness—would be their lead announcer. He started announcing some MLS games, and then Fox threw him directly into the fire and...
People Are Paying For Coffee Made From Poop
In news that is old to much of the world but very new and alarming to me, there is a type of coffee out there called Kopi Luwak that retails for $168.95 per bag and is processed by feeding coffee beans to a civet—a kind of Indonesian woodland creature—and then letting the beans pass through its stoo...
Jermaine Jones Gets Red Card, Attacks Referee
Jermaine Jones, German-born USMNTer currently in MLS to get some checks and play whatever position he wants, has a history of getting heated and falling ass first into some stupid red cards. Back at Schalke, he got suspended for two months for stomping on Marco Reus’s foot....
Watch This Harrowing Documentary About The Working Conditions In Qatar
Sometimes it’s easy to get wrapped up in FIFA’s more bureaucratic forms of corruption and forget that the biggest crime by far that soccer’s governing body has committed was aiding and abetting the workplace atrocities that are so prevalent in Qatar....
Fox Loses Broadcast During World Series
It’s not just you: during the bottom of the 4th inning of tonight’s World Series game from Kansas City, Fox’s broadcast cut out. After a few seconds Fox cut to a clearly confused Dan O’Toole in the studio, who explained that power was lost to Fox’s truck, and got Dontrelle Willis to blab about god k...