dea Page 491 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Never Good When The MLS Has The Best Week
explains Beckham to us much better than we did to the world. • Careful of what cars you steal. • One more time: Gay Yankees. • We live blogged a guy talking into a microphone. • Stop the ESPN Motion. • Matt Leinart says he's a great dad, and even remembers his kid's name. • Our NFL Season Previews b...
Can't Sleep, Clown Will Eat Us
In honor of "The Simpsons Movie" coming out today, we're not even gonna try to bother with a movie quote today. Instead, we just invite everybody to give their own....
Remembering Skip Prosser
The college basketball world is still coming to terms with the death of Wake Forest coach Skip Prosser yesterday. Prosser was 56 years old and had been jogging on campus. His death shocked many, and the Web features many excellent tributes to him....
The End Of July Ain't What It Used To Be
As much as we might try, we can't muster up much enthusiasm for the trading deadline this year, which is in week. No matter scenarios they give us, we just don't believe anyone too huge will end up switching teams. The days of the Mark McGwire, Mike Piazza trades seem over. (Not that we ever conside...
Please Consult Your Employee Handbook
• The memo that changed our lives. The part where Skipper explains what a leader is, that's still our favorite one. • Tommy Morrison loves black people. • Kill the ref! No, seriously, they might kill him. • Fight, children, fight. • Joe Torre is a racist, don't ya know. • We are not going to Fire Is...
Make Like A Tree And Get Out Of Here
Last night, Darth Vader came down from planet Vulcan and told us that if we didn't take Lorraine out that he'd melt my brain....
A Baby Name Which Will Cause No Future Embarrassment Whatsoever
When all is said and done, I blame the mom. When your last name is Karr, and dad comes up with the brilliant idea of naming the new baby Chevy, that's when you put your foot down, ladies. And you put it down hard ... on dad's genitals while he's sleeping, if necessary. And if he still insists, then ...
Elijah Dukes' Divorce Proceedings, Shockingly, Are Getting Nasty
As you probably might expect, the wife of "troubled" Devil Rays outfielder Elijah Dukes is filing for divorce. (This tends to happen when you send your wife's cell phones photos of guns.) She has come up with some not-really-all-that-surprising accusations....
Dog Days Of All-Star Week
• What a dull week. • Not a happy time at Dan Shaughnessy's Amazon page. • Everywhere you look, there is Spike The Super Ball. • Kige Ramsey makes the world a better place. • Have a Coke and smile. • Jared Allen, signing things that aren't fun to have signed. • We hear Simmons is definitely doing an...
You Don't Go To Work Every Day; You Go To A Bar Every Day
That's why we drink it straight. The ice cubes are too heavy....
To Watch Tonight
• 7 p.m. — Arena Football Playoffs: Philadelphia Soul at Georgia Force. You can't force soul on people. It has to come naturally. [ESPN2] • 8 p.m. — MLB: Atlanta Braves at San Diego Padres. Greg Maddux pitching against his former team, making for a riveting storyline three years ago. [ESPN] • 8 p.m....
If You Were A Veggie Hot Dog, Would It Be OK To Eat Yourself?
• God, the hot dog eating championships are fun. • John Patterson, get thee to Canada. Don't tell Spencer Hawes! • 45 seconds ... starting NOW. • Cursing at Yankee Stadium? Now we've seen EVERYTHING! • Dan LeBatard would like to keep Harold Reynolds away from his women. • MJD left us, but he is not ...
Everything We Touch Is Food For Our Hunger. Our Hunger For Power.
Sometimes even the wisest of man or machine can make an error....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while achieving total conciousness ... • MLB: The John McLaren Era begins the way you knew it would. Royals 3, Mariners 2. • Soccer: So, is this Paraguay's version of "Do You Believe In Miracles?" Probably not. U.S. falls 3-1 at Copa. • Tennis: Nadal wins to advance at Wimbl ... no w...
Goodnight, Friends
I suspect that it will be surreal when I wake up next Saturday and have nothing to write. There's a good chance I won't know what to do with myself and I'll end up writing an 11,000 word essay on why I suspect that Ron Gardenhire suffers from erectile dysfunction....
Goodbye, MJD, Hello, Popular Redesign
• Our redesign went over like gangbusters, totally. We are working on it, promise. • God, we hate rain. • EIU wrestltng fever: CATCH IT. • Matt Geiger, pimp. • Pirate fan walkout? What Pirate fan walkout? • Goodbye, Rod Beck. • Dice-K rocks, sort of. • David Hirshey is not handling this Thierry Henr...
Come Join Us At The Philly Pants Party
After a bit of a delay, we have the details for the next Deadspin Pants Party, to be held in Philadelphia on Saturday, July 14. It's all official and stuff: You can buy your tickets right here. Game starts at 3:55. We will be there, as will the esteemed balls of A.J. Daulerio....