detroit Page 16 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Vikings Defense Ate Matthew Stafford Alive
After starting the season with wins against Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers, the Lions have gone from a team that had dark horse potential to one that is definitively ass. This afternoon, the Vikings took advantage....
Joel Embiid Announces Plans To Expand His Real Estate Empire By Building Additional Housing Units In Andre Drummond's Cranium
Basketball star and no-rent housing innovator Joel Embiid had a monster game against the Pistons yesterday. And in his 39-point performance—32 of them coming in a scorching first half—Embiid achieved his twin goals of clowning on and growing his real estate investments with his favorite rival/unwitt...
Coach Who Always Looks Like A Pile Of Dirty Laundry Scolds Reporter For Slouching
Lions head coach Matt Patricia got testy with a reporter in today’s presser after being asked a question about how trading Golden Tate made the franchise better. The inquiry apparently didn’t bug him so much as the posture of the person asking it....
Joel Embiid And Andre Drummond Are Beefing, We Got Some Basketbeef Here
Philadelphia 76ers center Joel Embiid is a big fat out-of-shape butt and also a very fine television actor, according to Detroit Pistons center Andre Drummond. Let’s back up and make some sense of that....
Blake Griffin Overwhelms The Sixers, In 2018
I don’t know if I’ve ever exactly forgotten about Blake Griffin, but certainly the time spent last season toiling away on irrelevant Clippers and Pistons squads didn’t help restore any of the prestige lost during three seasons spent mostly in injury hell. It seems like whole eras have passed since G...
Shameless Joel Embiid Flop Gets Andre Drummond Tossed From One-Possession Game
This moment didn’t wind up deciding Tuesday night’s excellent Sixers-Pistons game, but certainly removing his counterpart from the game made it a worthwhile ploy for Joel Embiid. With the score tied in the final minute of regulation, Embiid beat Andre Drummond to the cup for a tough bucket; as the b...
Blake Griffin Had A Bad Start To His Season Thanks To Jarrett Allen
We all wondered what the high-flying Blake Griffin would look in the latter stages of his career when he could no longer consistently rely on his athleticism for buckets like he once used to. Thankfully, Jarrett Allen was there to answer that question for us tonight....
Report: Tigers Announcers Whose Beef Turned Physical Won't Be Back Next Year
The highlight of the Detroit Tigers’ season came when reports of a physical altercation between play-by-play man Mario Impemba and color commentator Rod Allen hit the internet. The incident occurred on Sept. 4, and neither man returned to the booth for the remainder of the season. The Detroit News r...
Detroit Arena To Replace Conspicuously Empty Red Seats With Less Conspicuously<em></em> Empty Black Seats
Ever since the new, taxpayer-funded home of the Pistons and Red Wings opened in Detroit, people have taken note of the often empty seats surrounding the action. This was especially true during Pistons games last season, when the team consistently found itself playing in front of a sea of vacant red ...
Here Are All Five Of Mason Crosby’s Missed Kicks Today
The Lions beat the Packers today, 31-23. They got a bit of help from the Packers’ kicker, Mason Crosby, who missed five kicks that could’ve totaled 13 points....
Report: Comerica Park Employee In Police Custody After Spitting On Pizza
A food services employee at Comerica Park, where the Detroit Tigers attempt to play professional baseball, is reportedly in police custody after another employee posted a video on Instagram of him spitting on the beginnings of a pizza while working at a concession stand....
Can Matt Patricia Break The Belichick Curse?<em></em>
Many of the modern NFL’s legendary coaches have impressive coaching trees. Hefty branches that bore much fruit. Assistants that became successful head coaches and who then mentored younger coaches to do the same. Bill Walsh coached Dennis Green, who coached Brian Billick, who coached Jack Del Rio, w...
The Patriots Are Slllooooowwwww
Nobody is allowed to say that this is finally the season when it all comes apart for the New England Patriots until they have been mathematically eliminated from playoff contention. Nobody is allowed to do it! But what we can do, a few hours after the Pats were handily beaten on national TV by a Lio...
Report: Rob Gronkowski Threatened To Retire Rather Than Play For The Lions
Adam Schefter’s Sunday-morning scoop this week is about a trade that almost went down back in April. Normally, reports on trades that didn’t actually happen are far less juicy than ones that have happened or might in the future. But Schefter’s report—which names a previously unknown team from an Ian...
Steve Yzerman Is Leaving Tampa And Hell Yeah Motherfucker He Is Definitely Coming To Detroit
Mission accomplished! Mark it the hell down. Steve Yzerman is finally coming back home to Detroit to save the godforsaken Red Wings. At least, that’s the only logical conclusion one can draw from today’s news:...
The Jets Say They Knew Everything The Lions Were Going To Run
After a true and prodigious walloping of the Lions, the Jets defense said they knew exactly what was coming. And while that’s the sort of thing defenses like to say, there were plays in Monday night’s 48-17 chucklefest that didn’t look like they could’ve happened any other way....
The Lions Should Probably Never Play Like That Ever Again
It was a terrible, awful, no good and very bad day for Detroit’s two Matts—Stafford and Patricia—in the Lions’ Monday night season opener against the Jets. Stafford threw four terrible interceptions and finished with a quarterback rating of 47.9, and his shit sandwich of an evening was topped by a p...
Kenny Golladay Might Not Be Playing In His Best Position
The powerful, yet errant, arm of Matthew Stafford certainly must make life as a Lions receiver a bit more difficult than it has to be. You’ll either get a well-placed ball on a deep route, or see the ball sail over your head when your route is anything under 15 yards. To deal with his quarterback’s ...
Darn Old Jets Start New Era In Familiar Bad Way<em></em>
The Jets’ recent history of self-sabotage is already rubbing off on No. 3 overall pick Sam Darnold. Less than 15 seconds into his regular-season debut, he threw the mother of awful passes and gave Detroit, along with Matt Patricia’s beard, an early touchdown lead....
![Report: Detroit Tigers Announcers Had A "Physical Altercation" After Game [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/ezrgeuyci5wkqd8qbfjc.png)
Report: Detroit Tigers Announcers Had A "Physical Altercation" After Game [Update]
Play-by-play man Mario Impemba and color commentator Rod Allen have been calling Tigers games on Fox Sports Detroit together for over a decade—and they make a great on-screen duo, for what it’s worth. But apparently, putting two men together in a small box and forcing them to talk for several hours ...