dick Page 18 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

UFC Fighter Bryce Mitchell Drilled His Nuts Apart
“So i was gunna train today but i ripped my nutsack in half,” begins a Homeric Facebook post by UFC featherweight Bryce Mitchell. This is the “A screaming comes across the sky” of our time. ...

J.J. Redick Says He Discovered A Caged Person In His Taxi
Before a chat with Orlando Magic rookie Mo Bamba, J.J. Redick opened today’s episode of his podcast with an account of how he supposedly saw a person in a cage in his car service driver’s trunk yesterday. Wait, what?...

The Mariners, And Their Fans, Have Had A Bad Few Weeks
What you are looking at here is a Mariners fan fucking up, just as the M’s have been doing for the past several weeks now. The team, though still 18 games above .500, has recently slipped to 2.5 games behind the A’s for the second wild card spot. This is despite the fact that, as late as June 16, th...

Pole Vaulter Nearly Makes Shish Kebab Of His Dick And Balls
At the IAAF Rabat Diamond League track meet in Morocco today, pole vaulter Timur Morgunov’s pole skewered the front of his shorts. His dangly bits narrowly and luckily remained intact....

The Sound When These Two Men Smash Their Dicks And Balls Together Will Stay With You Long Into The Night
This happened in the seventh inning of Saturday’s Mariners-Rays game, with a runner on first and the Rays holding a 6-3 lead. It was a clutch, inning-ending grab, but it came with great, great sacrifice:...

Josh Reddick Fries Mike Trout At Third, Then Cooks Ian Kinsler At The Plate
Astros right fielder Josh Reddick had to have assumed he taught the Angels a lesson about running on his arm in the sixth inning tonight. When Mike Trout tried to move from first to third on a Shohei Ohtani single, he quickly became, in the accurate words of the announcer, “a dead duck.”...

Yadier Molina Undergoes Surgery After Taking Fastball To The Dick And Balls
On the list of worst-case scenarios for baseball catchers, this sequence has got to rank somewhere near the top: getting nailed in the junk by a deflected 102-mph fastball; requiring surgery for anything having to do with getting nailed in the junk by a deflected 102-mph fastball. But that appears t...
![Mischievous Dong Photobombs Marathon Photo Finish [NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/aleqwnjii3sxqqbdtbj0.png)
Mischievous Dong Photobombs Marathon Photo Finish [NSFW]
The 2018 Christie Clinic Illinois Marathon was held Saturday in Champaign, and featured a virtually unheard of finish: runners Tesfaalem Mehari and Wilson Chenwono crossed the finish line at the same instant, and the result was ruled a tie. The runners will reportedly split the combined purse for fi...

Leonys Martín Hits Dong, Then Hits Dong
Leonys Martín led off today’s Tigers-Pirates game with a big home run, but it came at a price. On the fourth pitch of the game, Martín ricocheted a pitch off the plate into his dick and balls. He rolled around for two minutes afterward and had a hard time standing back up....

Serge Ibaka Got Hit In The Dick And Balls
Through three quarters, Kelly Oubre had no points in today’s NBA playoff opener for the Washington Wizards. What he did have was an amazing pass right into Serge Ibaka’s dick and balls....

I Blame Chris Brown
Here are just a few, tiny things that happened in a dark, bizarre, depressing Year of our Lord 2018:...

Why Is Charlie Ebersol Launching A Direct Rival To His Buddy Vince McMahon's XFL?
The most delightfully stupid sports story of 2018 is still extremely stupid, but it just got a lot more complicated. Vince McMahon’s nascent MAGA-adjacent XFL revival was first reported back in December, formally announced in January, and seemingly set for a February 2020 launch. It now has to deal ...

Can These Two Guys Get Their Hands On “Big Dick Nick”?
As Nick Foles delivered the performance of his life in the most important game he’d ever played, Austin Meeks and John Robinson had an idea....

J.J. Redick Apologizes For Saying "Chink" In Chinese New Year Message: "I Was Tongue Tied"
Over the weekend a video started making the rounds that appeared to show Sixers guard J.J. Redick throwing the slur “chink” into a video celebrating the Chinese New Year:...

UFC Vet Joe Lauzon Ruptured One Of His Teammate's Testicles In Training
UFC newcomer Devin Powell had to undergo surgery yesterday after Joe Lauzon busted him in the dick and balls with the “sheer power” of an unintentional knee during training. Powell’s all good, ball-wise, though he’ll need to recover for a bit....

Allegedly Enormous-Donged Eagles QB Leads Team To Super Bowl Victory
The Philadelphia Eagles are Super Bowl champions after defeating the New England Patriots 41-33 Sunday, and they couldn’t have done it without the stellar performance from backup quarterback Nick Foles and his reportedly gigantic hog....

Avalanche's Mikko Rantanen Scored A Goal Off His Crotch
For a hockey player in front of the net, it’s all about getting good position and setting a screen—and also sometimes taking a puck off his dick....

Kyrie Irving's And J.J. Redick's Brains Are In The Fifth Dimension In The Palace Of Truth
Kyrie Irving went on J.J. Redick’s Ringer podcast today, and the two former Dookies spent a good 10 minutes Expanding Their Minds and swapping Deep Thoughts. Irving addressed his Flat Earth trutherism, and says came to his own conclusions after doing his own research, which he says came from Instagr...

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What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
If Christmas is all about putting stuff up butts, New Year’s Day is the day to read about the many methods of absolute destruction of America’s dick and balls, and to be thankful it wasn’t you. Unless it was....