dl Page 152 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Drunk Coachella Guy Is Here To Save The Day
So, today. Well, good intentions, yadda yadda. It ended up being funny in an absurd sense, right? Well, here's a drunk guy at Coachella last weekend who can't quite figure out sandals or the concept of balance. This is not a metaphor....

Fans Oddly Excited To Meet Guy Impersonating Capitals Owner
Not happy with Washington's lackluster first round so far? Blame this guy who sort of looks like Ted Leonsis. [DC Sports Bog/Ted's Take]...

Lou Piniella Bawls Out With His Balls Out
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Dallas-Area Cheerleaders Piss Team Spirit, Piss
KXAS-TV does one of those routine cheerleaders-force-other-cheerleaders-to-drink-urine stories, only this one involves some gross-out B-roll and a "bad taste in their mouth" zinger as the kicker. Kudos to the awesomely monikered reporter, Ashanti Blaize. [Fat White Guy]...

Andray Blatche Really, Really Wanted That Triple-Double
We like to think players are so caught up in the game that they don't notice when they're approaching a statistical accomplishment. It's not true. Here's Andray Blatche doing everything humanly possible to get his 10th rebound....

The Steve Phillips Redemption Timeline
AOL Fanhouse hired Steve Philips as their new baseball analyst, just 161 days after the world learned he had an affair with an ESPN underling. Is that some kind of record for morphing from sexual disgrace to professional respectability?...

Does Roger Clemens Look Like A Man Who Can't Please A Lady In Bed?
According to his former cuckoo mistress, Mindy McReady, The Rocket had some problems satisfying her in the bedroom. Even when she was 15? [Fox411]...

Milton Bradley, Nothing If Not Consistent
The newest Mariner is very sorry for his two consecutive Spring Training ejections. Just kidding! He says he'll never change, and that the umpires are out to get him. [Seattle Times]...

I Was There: March Madness Special
Throughout the tournament, we'd like you to help out with our #iwasthere page to discuss your March Madness related memories. Go on. Take a look. They're nice stories....

Do You Dream of Wearing a Fedora while Rocking a Pro Basketball Jersey?
Then you're a closeted hoopster. Won't you please head over to the Dream Visualizer to see your dream turned into a personalized animation that you can then share with all of your Facebook friends?...

Inflatable Dong-Tongued Mascot Returns To Eat ESPN's Michelle Beadle
Mackerel Jordan, last seen devouring hapless university athletic department employees, appeared on SportsNation yesterday. After being mocked by Michelle Beadle, the man-fish did what man-fish do best: feast....

Sidney Crosby Hates America (But You Already Knew That)
In New York this week, Crosby turned down an invitation to do Letterman's Top Ten list, and apparently it's not the first time. He's probably a Leno fan. Figures. [NY Post]...

New Mike And Mike Book "Enthralling," "Humanizes A Downtrodden, Long-Suffering People," Per Amazon
Either someone at Amazon is having a bit of sport with Fat Man and Little Boy's forthcoming Rules for Sports and Life, or the pair has written the definitive treatise on life in North Korea. [Amazon, see "Editorial Reviews"]...

Floyd Landis Wanted For Computer Hacking. Really.
Remember when Floyd Landis didn't really win the Tour de France because of his iron-rich blood or something? France sure does and now they think he might have broken into the computer system that held his test results....

Bad Beats: A Bad Beat Of My Own, Courtesy Of Brooklyn Decker
Your weekly gambling column, featuring smart plays, oddball propositions, all your tales of woe — plus, betting advice from a 13-year-old boy! Send your stories to [email protected]. Subject: Bad beats....

Cameron Diaz Has Unenviable Task Of Bringing Yankees 28th World Series
According to Ok! magazine, Cameron Diaz has hopped on the Blue-Lipped Express that is Alex Rodriguez. The two were seen dancing and being flirty with each other over the weekend. So that means they're totally doing it. [OK!]...

Steve Phillips "Moves On" By Spilling His Guts To Matt Lauer
Steve Phillips made it out of sex rehab alive and has definitely seen the error of having sex with people who aren't your wife. So he went on "Today," because this is information that America needs to hear....

Bad Beats: It's Only Teenage Wasteland
Your weekly gambling column, featuring smart plays, oddball propositions, all your tales of woe — plus, betting advice from a 13-year-old boy! Send your stories to [email protected]. Subject: Bad beats....

Lance Broadway and Gerald Laird Would Make An Excellent Battery
Major league journeymen sure are punchy this offseason. Former White Sox/Met and current Blue Jay minor leaguer Lance Broadway is being sued for rearranging a man's face at a New Year's Eve party in Dallas. While shirtless, of course....

Bad Beats: Kiss The Girls
Your weekly gambling column, featuring smart plays, oddball propositions, all your tales of woe — plus, betting advice from a 13-year-old boy! Send your stories to [email protected]. Subject: Bad beats....