dl Page 156 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Milton Bradley Is Uncomfortable, And So Is A Certain Water Cooler
Lou Piniella, Milton Bradley and a water cooler — not as sexy a ménage à trois as it sounds. And unfortunately, it turns out the water cooler is the Lucky Pierre in this uninviting threesome....

LeBron, Meet Your New Teammate: Shaquille O'Neal
The Cavaliers and Suns have reached a deal in principle to send Shaquille O'Neal to the Land of LeBron, Yahoo! Sports reports. Ben Wallace, Sasha Pavlovic and a pick to Phoenix. No confirmation from @THE_REAL_SHAQ yet. [Yahoo!, Twitter]...

A Great White Shark Ate This Man's Hand
I find it amazing how after surfers get attacked by sharks ,some of them jump right back in the ocean and continue the sport with less body parts. But here's another handless Aussie surfer walking through the raindrops....

Let's All Jump Into Puddles
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Ed O'Bannon Would Like To Be In Basketball After All
After not hearing his name in years, you now have two Ed O'Bannon updates in one week. Why? Because after a lengthy discussion about how he's finally come to terms with life after basketball, basketball is back in his life....

Would You Like To Buy A Car From Ed O'Bannon?
This is an interesting Sunday profile of former UCLA star Ed O'Bannon. Interesting, because you could probably substitute "Ed O'Bannon" for the name of any athlete coming to terms with his fading glory and it's pretty much the same article....

Steve Nash Auditions For His Next Job
No one knows how many miles Steve Nash has left on his little Canadian legs, but if he's looking to break into the late-night TV comedy game, his first test for his second career went fairly well....

Today Everyone Is Finally Convinced Kobe Bryant Is One Of The NBA's Greatest Despite His Shaq-Filled, Jizz Bomb Past
The Lakers still need two more games to close out the Magic, but those people who never doubted Kobe's true greatness for most of his career are filing early to get a leg up on those who did....

Barca Loon Attempts To Rattle Federer With Annoying Flag-To-The-Face Taunt
During the second set of the French Open, Roger Federer was hassled by a person waving a Barcelona flag, who somehow managed to make his way onto the Roland Garros court and get all up in Federer's face....

The End Of The Rocky Road For Clint Hurdle
Sources say! Clint Hurdle will be fired after seven years (really?) as Colorado's manager and just a little over one season removed from the team's World Series appearance. Does anyone have a John Denver CD I can borrow? [Denver Post]...

Wanted: Poise, Splits, Knowledge Of Middle East Geography
To be a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader, you need exquisite dance technique, plenty of enthusiasm and poise, a vibrant personality and the ability to do high kicks and splits. Also, you should "look well-proportioned in dancewear." And you have to identify a country on Iraq's borders....

That Wasn't Supposed To Happen Was It?
The Cavaliers had been sitting for eight days after sweeping the first two rounds, but that didn't seem to matter when they rolled out to a 15-point lead in the first half. Then the second half happened, and somehow when the final buzzer sounded LeBron and company were not ahead on the scoreboard. W...

This Is What Happens When You Annnounce A Woman's Age On Camera
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Bills' Hall-of-Famer Bruce Smith Charged With DUI
All Bills' bad behaviour, all the time! The all-time sacks leader was pulled over and arrested early Friday in Virginia Beach, Virginia....

Bills' Fullback Arrested on Charge of Exposing Sexual Organs
Urgent bulletin! New York City's public masturbation epidemic is spreading Northwards across the state!...

Meet Freddie Mitchell's Online Bodyguard: Alfred Luckerbauer
Any news about Freddie Mitchell at this point is sad and strange, so it's not surprising that the people who staunchly support him would be people like this man: Alfred Luckerbauer, proprietor of this site....

Carlos Zambrano Needs A Timeout
The Big Z is going on the 15-day DL with a bad hamstring. Should Cubs fans panic? Should they start beheading farm animals? Or get drunk and embrace the Jeff Samardzija Era. [Sun-Times]...

Jiri Hudler Is A Bleeder
Wyshynski breaks down the case for and against suspension over at Puck Daddy....

Josh Elliott Reveals What Makes A Giant Man With Uncooperative Hair Get Up So Early Everyday
ESPN's resident morning sports centrist, blog buzzologist, speaks candidly about sports media, some of his colleagues in Bristol, and even the odd fascination with Hannah Storm's wardrobe. [On The DL]...

See You On Down That Road, Redux
And now a special farewell to Rick Chandler from Emeritus, William F. Leitch....