e Page 7781 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Fantasy Manager Knows Better Than Anyone Else That There Was A No-Hitter Last Night
The way Liriano's season was headed, this wasn't the most foolhardy transaction ever made by a general manager, but it's never wise to dump a pitcher six hours before a start. Also, according to the tipster, this particular roto league has a No-Hitter category. Double dickpunch. (H/T Justin A.)...

Hey, There Was A No-Hitter Last Night
Francisco Liriano threw a no-no, and it feels like barely anyone's talking about it. Overshadowed by two sets of playoffs? The fact that it really wasn't a particularly dominant game?...

University Of Texas' Augie Garrido Is The Angriest, Most Foul-Mouthed Coach Since Bobby Knight
Golly. Augie Garrido sure gets steamed. I guess you can't argue with the results: Garrido has more wins than any NCAA Division I coach in baseball history, along with five national championships. This video is old and pulled from a Richard Linklater documentary that aired some time ago on ESPN (af...

Tyler Hansbrough Tackles "Chicken Little," And Other Great Moments In NBA Literature
Reading is fundamental! As part of a partnership with the Indianapolis-Marion County Public Library, kids (or, say, you) can dial up the Call-A-Pacer hotline at (317) 275-4444 to hear your favorite 8-seeds read from their favorite children's books. This week: Tyler Hansbrough reading "Chicken Litt...

Rajon Rondo Made Mike Bibby Do A Mental Somersault
So the Celtics got hammered down the stretch last night, and, yes, LeBron James made Rajon Rondo do a somersault that probably had Rondo snuggling up to his heat pack after the game. While everyone understandably shovels dirt on the Celtics' grave, however, consider the ease with which Rondo befud...

This Flying Kick Got A Kazakh Soccer Player Banned For Life
This footage, taken during a post-game brawl on April 16 this year, has just turned up. It shows Kairat's Armand Masimzhanov delivering a brutal flying kick to a Lokomotiv player at the end of their match. Masimzhanov was banned for life from the Kazakhstan Football Federation for "terrible cruelt...

LeBron James Made Rajon Rondo Do A Somersault
LeBron James played one of the best games of his career last night, which is saying something, because he is LeBron James. He shot 56 percent from the field and finished with 35 points, seven boards, and zero turnovers. The Heat will go to Boston for Games 3 and 4 of this series, which should have...

Danny Ainge Is Horrified By What He Sees
Your morning roundup for May 4, the day we again discovered Xanadu in Jersey....

Watch Jose Canseco Pitch A Reality Show To TruTV From His Cellphone
Last we caught up with Jose Canseco, he sent his twin brother to a celebrity boxing match in his place. This time, well, he's just seeing what a cruel bitch mainstream media can be....

Chris Paul Will Sign With Knicks And Heat In 2012
Chris Paul, fresh off an almost-upset in the first round, took in tonight's Heat-Celtics game with a recognizable cap atop his head and some slightly less recognizable people by his side....

Teenager Robs, Carjacks PNC Park Usher, Leaves Him To Die
This story is all kinds of horrifying. And, yeah, in part because we've seen how many cops are present at Pirates games to tase drunk folks....

Shin-Soo Choo And His Arresting Officer Combined For A Comedy Of Errors
Indians outfielder Shin-Soo Choo was arrested early Monday morning on DUI charges, the second such Indian and sixth MLB player this year. People smarter and more serious than we, like ESPN's Keith Law, have noticed and called out the trend—Law tweeted, "I'm so glad MLB is directing its time and mone...

Running Back For Popular NFL Team Apologizes For Bin Laden-Related Tweets
So much ado about nothing. Tashard Choice bowed to public pressure and apologized for tweeting that he was upset with CNBC for not airing To Catch a Predator on Sunday night at 10 p.m., as promised....

Michelle Obama Teaches You How To Dougie
We were wondering if our President and First Lady could do anything to top what just might be The Best Week Ever In Presidential History. And then Michelle Obama went ahead and did the Dougie. This, you should know, as a potentially tax-paying American, is a part of the "Let's Move!" campaign and ...

Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread
Two second-round NBA Game Twos to watch this evening: Celtics-Heat at 7, and Grizz-Thunder at 9:30, both on TNT....

Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread
Two second-round games tonight for your viewing pleasure: Caps and Lightning, which appears on your Versus right about now, and the Canucks and Preds, which will be on at nine, 10 p.m. Halifax time....

Derrick Rose, NBA MVP, Thanks His Mother And Warms Our Frigid Hearts
Chicago's Derrick Rose was named the NBA's 2010-11 Most Valuable Player today. He is the youngest MVP in league history. Rose delivered remarks to members of the Chicago media this afternoon; he sounded perhaps nervous and certainly young, because he is. But he was careful to take the time to than...

We Are All Dave McKenna LXXXVIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Daniel Snyder's dumbass libel suit lies gets double tapped by DEVGRU....

Retiring Beer League Softball Commish Would Like To Thank Himself For All His Hard Work And Dedication
Lucky for us and our readers, half of all intramural sports participants join up just to get in touch with their inner asshole. I suspect that most of these individuals are tolerable for most of the day, but once they throw on a T-shirt with a number on the back something changes inside them. Like t...

Charlie Bell's Love-Advice Videos Are Strangely Poignant Now That His Wife Is Charged With Stabbing Him
Golden State backup guard Charlie Bell has a bizarre web series called the "Truth Doctor" in which he doles out love advice to the masses (relatively speaking: most clips get about 500 views) and takes people on tours of his sparse apartment. Another interesting tidbit about Charlie Bell: his wife...