e Page 8032 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Tarp Surfing Is Neat, Pointless
I suppose skateboarding gets boring after a while—one can kickflip only so many times—so these young men deserve some credit for creativity. But why two levels of pretend surfing? That said, this should happen during rain delays. [Kottke]...
Surprisingly, Infant No Match For MMA Fighter
Watch Alan Belcher demonstrate the rear naked choke on his baby, which, if performed correctly, can cause your opponent to slur her speech, spontaneously lose consciousness, and soil herself. [MMA Girls]...
We Want To See Your Ironic NBA Jerseys (UPDATE)
Yesterday, we posted a quicklink to The Faster Times's gallery of indie bros wearing NBA jerseys at the Pitchfork Festival. It's a fascinating phenomenon, a game even, as if they're actively trying to wear the most ridiculous NBA jersey imaginable....
Ooh, Ooh: Cristiano Ronaldo Is Getting Married!
Frankly, thank Christ for Facebook — without it, Cristiano Ronaldo's life might maintain an element of mystique, but then everyone would be bored....
A Compendium Of Horrible, Horrible Twitter Poetry
Twitter is an inherently silly and disposable means of communication. Oh, but there are people out there who take their tweets seriously. Very seriously. AFFIRMED....
Dodgers Lose Another One, This Time To The Rulebook
We love it when a manager uses the rulebook to his advantage. Bruce Bochy caught acting Dodgers manager Don Mattingly inadvertently stepping off the mound during the visit to his pitcher, and the resulting nitpick gave the Giants a victory....
ESPN Ombudsman Is Late To The Party, But Piles On LeBron's "Decision"
Don Ohlmeyer used 4,600 words to say what's already been said, more pointedly and for weeks, about ESPN's conflicts of interest hosting LeBron James's infomercial. Credit the dotcom for only burying it near the bottom of the front page. [ESPN]...
Jimmy Johnson To Make Tropical Paradise Hell For Other People On <em>Survivor</em>
Perhaps confident that ExtenZe All-Natural Male Enhancement tablets can sell themselves, Johnson is exiling himself to Nicaragua for the next season of Survivor....
Dumb TV People Interview Thierry Henry, Remind America Why It Can't Have Nice Soccer Things
Click to viewThe newly minted New York Red Bull visited the set of Fox 5's morning show, Chirpy Morons Sit on Sofa and Talk About Vitamins, and submitted to a whole host of indignities. Watch, if you can. [MLS Talk, via @GrantWahl]...
Last Night's Winner: The NHL Growing A Pair For Once
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the NHL, which by rejecting Ilya Kovalchuk's contract did the right thing; unfortunately they've been doing the wrong thing for so long, they just come off hypocritical....
And In The 7th, Someone Tried To Throw A Chair At Beck And O'Reilly, But It Hit Geraldo In The Nose
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...
Carl Crawford Takes A Major League Nutshot
Here's Crawford taking a pickoff throw in a very sensitive area. He would leave the game, with our sympathies....
Arizona Lady Emigrates Illegally From Shirt
Maybe Arizona is the lawless hellhole Jan Brewer's made it out to be, after all. Between the Nazis on the borders and the streets becoming sets for an ill-advised No Country For Old Men sequel, the citizens of Arizona now have to worry about the unpatrolled border of this lady's cleavage....
Young Ladies, Who May Or May Not Have Penises, Enjoy Cricket
A troupe of traveling Thai Ladyboys have given cricket a go on their visit to Manchester. They learned that athletic tape wasn't intended for taping your junk between your legs, but it does the trick. [Metro] (H/T Tom K. Again.)...
Best News Lede Ever? Best News Lede Ever.
"A German court on Tuesday threw out the case of a schoolteacher against a pupil who allegedly tormented her by scrawling pictures of rabbits on the blackboard to aggravate her rabbit phobia." [The Local] (H/T Tom K.)...
Ah, The Ol' Lacrosse Hidden Ball Trick
It might not have the Iroquois, but the World Lacrosse Championship does have the sneaky Japanese...What do you mean, 'racial stereotype?' It's the hidden ball trick! That's sneaky!...
Jeff Gordon's Ex-Wife Being Sued For Naming Her Son After Him
James Dixon, the father of Brooke Gordon's 1-year-old, has taken her to court, demanding child support and that he have Dixon's last name instead of "Gordon." Dixon should be happy: without Jeff Gordon, Brooke wouldn't have any money to give. [Scene Daily]...
Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Jeremy Lin
Today's Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape-e: Harvard man and future D-Leaguer, Jeremy Lin cut to the Teshian rhythms and St. Louisan rhymes of Nelly's "Heart of A Champion." ...
Accused Rapist Now Tied With Serial Philanderer As America's Favorite Athlete
The full list, per Harris Interactive: 1.) Acquitted Accused rapist, serial philanderer; 3.) Overrated tax cheat; 4.) Former junkie; 5.) Choker; 6.) Cocksucker; 7.) Corporate tool; 8.) Pretty boy; 9.) Drew Brees; 10.) Some guy driving a car. [Harris Interactive]...
America's Dumbest Student-Athlete: Tremaine Billie, Clemson University
Mr. Billie AKA "T.Billie" has received multiple nominations thanks to the unfortunate "e-portfolio" he created when he was a student. It's a masterpiece....