e Page 8036 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Rony Seikaly
Today on Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: the Spin Doctor, Rony Seikaly. Marvel at his barrage of low-post moves and plus-ability to rock the old nylon warm-ups, all while enjoying the incongruously hard rhymes of the rap group Atmosphere....
Public Urination: The Scourge Of St. Andrews (UPDATE)
During the adorable "wind delay" today at the British Open, a time-filling Scott Van Pelt was forced to remark-without-actually-remarking on a man just mindin' his own business, tryin' to drain the main vein....
Here's Video Of All The World Cup Red Cards Set To A Snappy Tune
If you enjoyed our previous montage, let this one act as a palate cleanser. Hand balls, flopping, cleat attacks — enjoy the best in red-card-worthy World Cup cheating. [Dirty Tackle]...
America's Dumbest Student-Athlete Nominee: Eric, University of Wisconsin-Parkside
From a reader named Mark: This is an essay from a former University of Wisconsin-Parkside wrestler for an intro to writing class....
Pussification Of Youth Sports Reaches New Nadir
This 13-year-old's father, who just happens to be an attorney, is suing a little league coach for telling the pitcher to throw at his son. More importantly, the kid is wearing a shirt that appears to say "HARD-ON." [News-Herald]...
Ochocinco. Gambling. In His Briefs. Sure, Why Not.
Chad appears to be having a grand old time in Vegas. Just don't ask where he keeps his roll of quarters. [Twitter]...
Paul The Psychic Octopus Caught Up In Transfer Battle
With the World Cup over, the fate of Paul the Octopus has been on everyone's mind. The Spoiler's Richard Gilzene has the latest....
Cockblocked by Nick Swisher! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase a few heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Read This: Don DeLillo's "At Yankee Stadium"
Granta has put up Don DeLillo's 1990 story "At Yankee Stadium," which depicts a Moonie wedding of 13,000 men and women (an actual event that remains perhaps the strangest phenomenon ever to materialize in the stadium, not counting Don Zimmer)....
Mark Chmura, Former Tight End, Lover Of Teenage Hot-Tub Parties, To Be Inducted Into Packer Hall Of Fame
He will be inducted Saturday night: "I had to grow up," said Chmura, who was acquitted in 2001 of child enticement and third-degree sexual assault charges stemming from a high school postprom party he attended in suburban Milwaukee."[WisconsinRapidsTribune]...
Landon Donvan Staying In Los Angeles Is Good For Whom, Exactly?
The MLS Commissioner said Donovan won't be transferred for the 3-plus years remaining on his Galaxy contract. Some people aren't happy, but to that MLS says, who cares what you want?...
Won't You Please Help Protect Our Fragile Baseball Players?
Russell Branyan is day-to-day after stubbing his toe while closing the curtains. Mat Latos goes on the DL with a strain suffered while attempting to hold back a sneeze. This is where you lie and claim a tranny hooker beat you up....
Last Night's Winner: The Ugly-Ass LeBron James Pendant's Sense Of Self-Worth
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the $10,000 LeBron James pendant, which would be happy to know how loved and wanted it is — if it were alive. Hmmm......
Breaking: Man Customizes Replica Jersey To Make Lewd Joke
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Midshipman, Indeed: Navy Player Sees Your Greg Oden-Grinding-On-A-Lady Photo And, Um, Raises You
The man getting his friction on in the above picture, a la Oden, is former Navy Midshipmen cornerback Lord Cole. At least I think it is. The only pictures I can find of him are a little blurry or inconclusive....
Darko Milicic Is Bread From God, And Other Crazy Things David Kahn Believes
"It was like," Timberwolves GM David Kahn said yesterday, "manna from heaven." By "it," he of course means Darko Milicic, and by "manna" he does not mean "flaky white substance blanketing the ground," even though he should....
America's Dumbest Student-Athlete Nominee: Steve Blake, University Of Maryland
This essay titled "Happy days at Johnny's" was submitted multiple times by Duke fans who claim this ridiculous ode to Johnny Rockets burger joint was penned by former Maryland guard Steve Blake. Embrace the happiness....
SMU's Focus On Academics Is Destroying Its Football Program
Fans, boosters and even the coach are up in arms over the rejection of two recruits on academic grounds, even though they qualify for almost any other program in the country. It's the polar opposite of the classic debate, and it's fascinating....
Producer Of Ridiculous Movies Buys Golden State Warriors
Peter Guber, Tinseltown bigshot and producer of Vision Quest and Flashdance, is part of the ownership group that has bid a record $450 million for the Warriors. He's a maniac and he's spending like he's never spent before. [Deadline]...
Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Gordon Hayward
Today's Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape is a real gem: Utah Jazz draftee Gordon Hayward showing off a barrage of put-backs and solid fundamentals to the ferocious "Straight Outta Compton" by NWA. ...