e Page 8388 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Blown Threesomes! Great Moments In Drunken Hookup Failure
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
HBO's <i>How To Make It In America</i> is Like a Free Drink at an Art Opening
Meaning, awesome. This Valentine's Day, grab your girlfriend or your girlfriend pillow and tune in to HBO for the premiere of How To Make It In America, a show about two 20-somethings hustling to make it in downtown NYC. Check out the trailer!...
Fatal Luge Crash Mars Opening Day
Nodar Kumaritashvili, a 21-year-old Georgian luger, died from head injuries suffered in a brutal crash in training today....
So You Think NU Can Dance, Weeks 6 & 7: In Which Joe Lunardi Has A Scarlett Johansson Fantasy
A weekly feature in which author Benoit Denizet-Lewis follows the fortunes of the only BCS school to have sucked so consistently and spectacularly that it has never made the NCAA tournament, Northwestern. Record: 16-8. Tournament prospects: NIT prospects? Great!...
NCAA Waits For Tebow To Leave Before Considering Rule That Would Affect Tebow
They're mulling over a rule that would ban words and designs from eye black. So players will now have to "go away by themself, shut the door behind them, and pray to their Father in private." [AP/Matthew 6:6]...
The Seven Things You Learn From Every Curling Story
Nothing says Winter Olympics like a "clueless reporter tries curling" story. (Except maybe the "here's a black Winter Olympian!" story.) We take you through a typical curling experience, as seen through the eyes of every reporter ever....
Cultural Oddsmaker: Who's The Next Longhorn Girl?
To commemorate the emergence of Arielle Whatsherface, the new hot, young teenager that collapsed the internet with her winsome good looks, the Cultural Oddsmaker column makes a brief return....
The 2010 Cubs Look Promising And Open To Sexual Experimentation
The Maple Street Press is certainly setting expectations for the Cubs extremely high this year. [ChicagoNow]...
Tailpipe: "The Padding Of The Console Pressed Against Her Side"
We recently discovered the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....
Because Winning And Staying Out Of Jail Were Getting Boring In Cincy
Troubled receiver Matt Jones will join the Troubled Bengals, who are also working out troubled corner Pacman Jones. And of course, T.O. rumors persist. Someone tell Mike Brown that "Hard Knocks" won't put the same team on twice. [Cincinnati Enquirer]...
The NCAA Cracks Down On Concussions, Hurt Feelings
Rules Committee proposal time! The two most pressing issues facing college football are, in no particular order, kids risking their health and livelihoods by playing with concussions, and losing teams feeling sad....
Coach K Will Be The Next Guy To Declare He Has No Interest In The Nets
A source tells the Bergen Record: "He's the Nets' first choice. It comes down to if he wants to leave Duke and his comfortable setting and take on a new challenge." Krzyzewski just produced a close approximation of a laugh....
Last Night's Winner: Whatever Passes For Roy Williams's Conscience
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the little man on Roy Williams's shoulder, who prevailed upon the coach to say he's very, very sorry....
Joe Paterno's New Eyewear: Eyes
The 83-year-old Penn State coach had eye surgery which helps him "read his watch" and "not have to wear glasses" anymore but he should, because without them, he looks old and scary. [FightOnState]...
Godwin's Law Strikes The SI Swimsuit Issue
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
PETA Upset By The White Meat Now
PETA is calling out Larry Bird for endorsing McDonalds. Because, apparently, it's 1993....
JuCo Coach Goes After Refs, Gets Cuffed
A coach and one of his players were arrested while confronting referees after a loss. Women's junior college basketball fever: catch it!...
Sepp Blatter Trafficks In Swinging Stereotypes
FIFA's president: "This is a special approach in the Anglo-Saxon countries. If this had happened in let's say Latin countries then I think he would have been applauded." No, in the Latin countries, this would have been mandatory. [Evening Standard]...
Aggravated Assault? Needs More Cowbell
Mississippi State students can rest easy tonight, because police have finally located the man who brutally beat a fellow student at the Egg Bowl with, yes, a cowbell....
Doug Gottlieb, "Touch-Screen Dong" (Touch Screen, 2010)
The ESPN analyst's latest work is a fine addition to the telestrator dong genre. Note the Fauvist coloring and bold gestural abstraction. He has wisely avoided one of dong art's most shopworn clichés, bypassing the pendulous balls entirely....