e Page 8864 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Sexy Olympian Has Sexy Performance
Now that Mother's Day is drawing to a close, we can get back to objectifying women. Just funnin'. I'm only interested in Rich Garces' tits. Or, failing that, Bobby Jenks'. Yesterday, noted attractive Olympian and tattoo enthusiast Nathasha Kai put on quite the show, scoring three goals in the U.S....

Douchetastic USC Walk-On Video Is Neuheisel's Gain
In what's already been something of a frustrating day for Southern California, a story gaining traction is that UCLA football coach Rick Neuheisel has been using the above video as a way to convince recruits to stear clear of USC, presumably because Brennan Carroll, the son of head coach Pete Carrol...

Tony Dungy Has A Short Memory
Indianapolis Colts coach Tony Dungy spoke with kids at a high school in Tampa on Thursday and apparently he was in a mood to foment him some controversy. And not in the usual "condemning o' the gays" way. Nope. He took a shot at the rival New England Patriots being embroiled in MattWalshGate. Nothin...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wishing you had Dumbo's mom......

OSU Lacrosse Goalie Makes Sport Watchable, If Briefly
I grew up in Maryland, where lacrosse is the official team sport (The official individual sport? Jousting. Yes, Maryland is retarded. I'm sure they'll change the team sport to Quidditch before the decade is out). There, lacrosse is all the rage with white guys and the rare black dude who listens to...

Hannah Storm To Weather SportsCenter Circus
Hannah Storm may have the name of a pro wrestler, but she's a serious germalist. She was the first full-time female sports anchor at CNN and a prominent figure at NBC Sports for a decade before jumping to CBS to host the CBS Early Show. She also told us about injuries in Madden '96, so she's got tha...

Drinking Helmet Enhances Signs, Eases Their Display
The drinking helmet is not only a good sign complement. It's a must. [The Sports Hernia]...

John Harbaugh Runs A Tight Ship
This is the first year the Ravens have held minicamp in 10 years without choking on the fumes of Brian Billick's smug. One thing remains unchanged: the complete disorder. It just wouldn't be the Ravens without it. Nearly all of the 85 players in camp were involved in a brawl yesterday that started ...

Wizards Players Following Through On Their Boycott Of <i>Love</i>
That may not actually be true, but the Wizards players swore they'd never go to Love, the club that played Jay-Z's diss track against DeShawn Stevenson, ever again. And for one night at least, that held true. Stet Sports Blog has the video of Caron Butler and DeShawn Stevenson partying it up at Ibiz...

An Indian Offensive 'SPLOSION!
The Cavs victory wasn't the only thing Mistake by the Lakers celebrated yesterday while eagerly awaiting their next 23-cent pizza day. Grady Sizemore homered twice and drove in five runs to propel the Tribe to a 12-0 throttling of the Blue Jays. It's enough to get Indians fans off their ice cream he...

O.J. Mayo Reportedly Accepted Gifts And Cash In High School And At USC
The WWL is all over its report this morning on "Outside the Lines" featuring the claim from a former associate of NBA prospect O.J. Mayo that the player accepted $30,000 in cash and gifts over the last four years from a Los Angeles-based event promoter....

Chris Osgood's Feel-Good Story Comes To A Butt-End
While Mitch Albom was gushing over what a selfless mensch Chris Osgood is on the Sports Reporters this morning for gracefully stepping aside when the Red Wings signed Dominik Hasek, he conveniently ignored the cheap shot Osgood took with the butt-end of his stick to the Stars' Mike Ribeiro at the en...

KG's Jedi Mind Tricks Don't Work In Cleveland
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who suggests that you see Iron Man immediately if you haven't already seen it. And if you have seen it, see it again. When he's not marketing major motion pictures for free, he can be found playing cards with Bigfoot at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...

About Last Night...
What you missed while being reminded not to feed the Ape......

The Happiest Place On Earth, After Mom's Favorite Antique Store
For the last post before Mother's Day, it would only be appropriate to feature the professional athlete who's the closest to his mother. That would be Super Bowl MVP Buster Bluth Eli Manning, who finally took his requisite parade float down Main Street of Disneyland on Wednesday after missing it in ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while modifying your flatscreen with a burlap frame......

Ex-Associate Claims In Book That O.J. Confessed To Murder While High
The Associated Press (via SportsbyBrooks) got the advance scoop on a book to be released Monday by Mike Gilbert, a memorabilia dealer who profited off O.J. Simpson for years, claiming Simpson admitted to killing his ex-wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, after he was acquitted for her murder....

Christian Laettner Inducted Into Hall Of Ethnic White People
For a Dukie, Christian Laettner had a decent enough NBA career: 13 seasons in the league with six teams, a member of the 1992 Dream Team and an All-Star reserve in 1997. And for that, he's going to the Hall. Oh no, you big silly, not the NBA Hall of Fame. He will enter The National Polish-American S...

Reports Of Limatime's Demise Greatly Exaggerated
A few weeks ago, it seemed, the world was faced with the sad prospect of bidding farewell to Limatime when reports surfaced out of Korea that he had been released by the Kia Tigers. Mope no longer, lovers of exuberant pitchers with stacked wives, for not only is Limatime born anew with the Tigers, ...

A Little Baseball Fanbase Redistricting
The revised Countries of Baseball map. [One Droo Hill]...