e Page 9042 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
As Deron Williams Becomes A Superstar...
Well, that was emphatic ... and just what this postseason needed. The Utah Jazz, back on their homecourt, busted out the whoopin' sticks on the San Antonio Spurs last night. Carlos Boozer (while not trying to stuff the basketball into Tim Duncan's rectal cavity) and Deron Williams had that pick-and-...
For Your Sunday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
1:00, ABC. IndyCar Racing. Indianapolis 500. 1:00, TBS. MLB. Phillies @ Braves. 1:00, ESPN. College Softball. DePaul vs. Oklahoma. 2:00, NBC. CORR Off-Road Racing. 2:00, FX. Movie. Friday Night Lights. 3:00, ESPN. College Softball. DePaul vs. Oklahoma. 3:00, ESPNU. College Softball. Arizona vs. Cal ...
About Last Night...
• NBA: Jazz 109, Spurs 83. And to think, I ridiculed their t-shirts. My apologies. • MLS: Wizards 4, Revolution 3. And it's a hat trick for Eddie Johnson. That guy's a wizard. • MLB: Padres 6, Brewers 3. Justin Germano: 4 starts, 3 wins, 1.08 ERA....
Hopefully, Tim Duncan Suffers From Cyanophobia
A fear of the color blue is what we're counting on to tighten this series up. The attire of the fans in Salt Lake City is the focus of the AP article previewing Game Three of the Spurs/Jazz series. Everyone in Energy Solutions arena will be decked out tonight in "True Blue" shirts that will, I don't...
To Watch Tonight...
• 8:00, ESPN2. NASCAR. Busch Series Carquest Auto Parts 300. I hope they let that stripper watch from her cell. • 8:30, ABC. NBA Playoffs. San Antonio Spurs @ Utah Jazz. I miss you, Hubie Brown. • 10:00, PPV. UFC 70. Chuck Liddell vs. Quinton Jackson. I'm pretty sure that Jimmy Snuka could take eith...
Why Yes, You Can Interest Caron Butler In Some Cake And Ice Cream
Caron Butler's been to both ends of the birthday party spectrum in the last year. Of course, there was Gilbert Arenas's blow-out, complete with ice sculpture, Busta Rhymes, and the Arenas Express Card....
Some Advice, AJ Nicholson: Kick Someone's Ass, Or Become Someone's Bitch
• Mr. Nicholson is going behind bars. [ESPN] • A plea for the Duke lacrosse team to show some self-respect. [Nation of Islam Sportsblog] • A Tennessee state trooper besmirches the good name of Randy Moss. [WEWS Cleveland] • Rashard Lewis, welcome to free agency. [SI] • Honoring the NBA's First Team ...
Bill Clement, You Sly Son Of A Bitch
Goodness. I hope that's not how he told his mom "Happy Mother's Day."...
David Beckham Is British Again
I thought we bought this guy. $250 million, and he doesn't even play for us? We got ripped off....
They Grow Up So Fast These Days
Meet Malcolm Sheppard, defensive tackle for the Arkansas Razorbacks. According to Loser with Socks, that's Malcolm one year ago, and Malcolm today....
Most NASCAR Owners Started This Way
Because she adds to what already could be the most historic weekend ever for women in auto racing, let's take a second to appreciate the "NASCAR stripper."...
The Less Majestic Barbaro
Proving once again (gosh, how much proof do you people need?) that he is blessed with other-worldly powers, Barbaro has expedited the reincarnation process and has gotten himself back into the world of competitive athletics. Barbaro had a boxing match last night in San Jose....
Florida (Oops) A&M Coach Explores The Fine Line Between Love And Stalking
When you're a member of the Florida A&M basketball program, women want you. Sometimes, you have to convince them of it first, but they do want you. And that's the message that Mike Gillespie Sr. was trying to teach his players yesterday. And the day before. And since 2005, really....
For Your Saturday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
12:00, ESPN. College Softball. DePaul vs. Oklahoma. 12:00, ESPN2. College Lacrosse. Delaware vs. Johns Hopkins. 1:00, FOX. NASCAR. Craftsman Truck Series Ohio 250. 1:00, ESPNU. College Baseball. Big East Tournament. 2:00, ESPN. College Softball. Florida vs. Texas A&M. 2:30, ESPN2. College Lacrosse. ...
About Last Night...
• MLB. Red Sox 10, Rangers 6. Matsuzaka left after five innings due to what Terry Francona describes as "the most covered case of intestinal turmoil ever." • WNBA. Mercery 111, Comets 85. I guess every basketball team in Phoenix scores a lot of points. • AFL. Blaze 65, Predators 62. Lookin' good, Jo...
Of Ping Pong Balls And Dogfights
• A-Rod likes his balls. • Carl Monday remains unstoppable. • Clinton Portis likes it when dogs fight. • Dan Shanoff live blogged the draft lottery, and it was not a happy night for Celtics fans. • AJ Hawk will be more careful about wedding photographers in the future. • NBC switches from playoff ov...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as Hurley comes barreling into the living room in a van ... • Boxing: Lightweights, Anthony Peterson vs. Luis Ernesto Jose; junior welterweights, Lamont (Not Anthony) Peterson vs. John (Harper's Ferry) Brown, at Washington, D.C. [ESPN2] • College softball: NCAA Division I tournament, s...
Remembering Back When This Race Mattered
Allow us to be the next in the long line of people lamenting the sorry state of the Indianapolis 500. The race has always been the only automobile-related event — save for any demolition derby — we've ever cared much about, and not just because it took place an hour-and-a-half from our house....
Probably Just Best To Stay In The Tunnel, Ma'am
What happens when a Canadian attempts to sing the U.S. National Anthem? Nothing short of comedy gold, that's what. We don't know exactly how old this is, or what game it's from, but we've seen enough boring renditions of our country's cherished song to wish that they'd do it this way every time. Any...
If Donnie Calls, Tell Him If It Was Gonna Be Anyone, We're Glad It Was Him
Forget about it is like, if you agree with someone, you know, like Raquel Welch is one great piece of ass, forget about it. But then, if you disagree, like A Lincoln is better than a Cadillac? Forget about it! You know? But then, it's also like if something's the greatest thing in the world, like mi...