ea Page 1900 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

And When It Was All Over, Rory McIlroy Sought Solace In The Arms Of Vince McMahon's Kid
Your morning roundup for April 11, the day we remembered that Sidney Lumet also directed The Wiz....

Rugby Player Who Took An Axe To Three Guys Who Allegedly Gangraped His Daughter Didn't Have A Daughter After All
There are a couple of details to update about the whole "Alleged Gang Rape Of Daughter Drives Former Pro Rugby Player To Decapitating Axe Murder" story. For one thing, he's been identified as former Blue Bulls player Joseph Ntshongwana....

Your Final Round Of The Masters Open Thread
There's a story on the Masters website about how Rory McIlroy and Jason Day set aside the "fun and frivolity" of "talking about random stuff, about Florida, jumping on Sea-Doos" during yesterday's round. Oh, those crazy kids....

A Bunch Of Guys Who Dyed Their Hair Blondish Won The NCAA Hockey Championship Last Night
Your morning roundup for April 10, the day a Virginia elementary school principal assures you the fourth-grade teacher didn't really put black and mixed-race students up for sale....

We Are All Dave McKenna LXV
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until some really bad, unspeakable things befall Snyder's dumbass libel suit. Today's topic: The draft....

Minor Leaguer Mercifully Cut By Indians Organization, Hits Million-Dollar Scratch-Off Ticket
Joel Torres still has major-league dreams despite being released by the minor-league Akron Aeros baseball team last month. He may have emptied all the luck from his tank yesterday, though, when he picked up a $660,300 lump-sum payment for hitting a $1 million "Sweet Millions" lottery ticket that h...

No Strikes, but One Out as Labor Unrest Hovers Over Video Games
For a brief moment Tuesday, I wasn't sure we'd be seeing any basketball video game this year, even though I'd taken for granted that NBA 2K12 would release, a death-and-taxes sure thing in October for more than 10 years.… [Kotaku] ...

Your Masters Open Thread
Tiger Woods and KJ Choi are scheduled to tee off at 2:35 p.m., with Jason Day and Rory McIlroy to follow 10 minutes later. CBS coverage of the third day of the Masters commences at 3:30 p.m. If you can't wait that long, there's live coverage online, too....

Here's Video Of Critics Of The Guy Who Sold The Sonics To Oklahoma City Getting Thrown Out Of A Costco
Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz went to the Costco in Issaquah, Wash. yesterday to autograph copies of his book "Onward: How Starbucks Fought for Its Life Without Losing Its Soul." Fans of the late Seattle SuperSonics found this ironic, since they consider letting their beloved basketball team leave ...

Even The Top Seed In The Playoffs Isn't Good Enough For This Expressive Bulls Fan
Your morning roundup for April 9, the day it became painfully evident that knowledge gleaned from the Old Testament and YouTube videos do not a professional at-home circumcisionist make....

109-Year-Old Woman Throws Ceremonial First Pitch Like A Girl
Today we salute Violet Smith, who celebrated her 109th birthday by throwing out the first pitch at opening day for the Great Lakes Loons on Thursday. We're impressed by her form — an overhand with a follow-through! — and by her being very much alive....

Fox 8 News Provided Us With Both Gloria James's Police Booking And On-Court Attack Videos Free Of Charge
Poor Gloria. Gloria just wanted her car, and Gloria just wanted some kid to foul her son like a considerate human being. We now have this Queen James highlight reel, thanks to the sharing souls at WJW Fox 8 News in Cleveland: Gloria's booking video at the Miami Beach Police Department, accompanied...

Bad Beats: Handicapping An <i>American Idol</i> That Has Gone Horribly, Horribly Wrong
Hello, folks. Welcome back to Bad Beats, the column you visit for betting advice and sad tales of gambling woe. Read past Bad Beats here. Got any stories for us? Email us at [email protected]. Subject: Bad beats....

Derrick Rose Floats One Off The Glass, And The Bulls Take The East
Last night, the Chicago Bulls defeated the Celtics by 16 points, 97-81. In doing so, they effectively clinched the top seed in the Eastern Conference for the first time since the 1997-98 season — Chicago would have to lose the remainder of its games and the HeatCeltics would have to win the rest o...

Cockblocked By Weed Addiction!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Mystery Solved: Courtside Guy At Bulls Games Is Matt Pritzker, And He Is Very, Very Rich
I-Team, you may stand down. So many of you have written in to solve today's mystery about the young fellow who sits courtside at Chicago Bulls games....

I-Team, Do You Know Who This Perpetually Courtside Bulls Fan Is?
Busy day for you guys, we recognize. But tipster Tom has written in with a pressing question:...

College Kid Who Cried "Coach Attacked Me" Apparently Decided To Steal Two Beers From The Phillies
Your morning roundup for April 8, the day the Associated Press union decided to stick it to The Man, with whom it's negotiating a new contract, by not promoting stories on Facebook and Twitter next week. Consequences will never be the same....

Deadspin I-Team: Who Is The Minor-League Hockey Forbidden Dancer?
A mere seven days ago, the existence of the Grand Rapids Griffins rail-dancing fan was confirmed. Today, tipster Chad sends footage taken from another angle of the spasmodic bit of body expression which puts everything into a wee bit more perspective. To wit:...

Police Report Says Gloria James Slapped A Valet In The Face And Then Fell Over
Gloria James has been charged with battery and disorderly intoxication after her early-morning altercation with a nightclub parking valet. We've transcribed the report below; the entire document is available via the Miami Herald. Everything sic'd, and de-capitalized for your sanity:...