ea Page 1969 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Oregon State Lineman Gets Naked, Tased
The college football arrest of the year award was handed out early, as a Beaver freshmen snuck into a house, stripped nude, and attempted to tackle officers....

Intern Horrors: Being Inducted Into The Klan At A Single-A Game
Welcome back to Intern Horrors, and we're back with more stories of boneheadedness and bosses degrading their most under of underlings. Today: unintentional racial insensitivity strikes minor league baseball, naked Don Zimmer, and so much more. Do it to it....

This Is What The NCAA Asks Baseball Recruits When They Are Drafted
The MLB Amateur Draft is unique in that sometimes, the players ignore that they've been drafted and head off to college for three years. That doesn't mean the NCAA doesn't suspect these kids of breaking the rules....

If Sideline Princess Is Already Taken, Jenn Brown's Friend Has A Promising Career As An Alcoholic Luchadora
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

MLB Confidential, Part 2: Seattle Mariners
You've seen the first round of financial statements. Now take a look inside the Mariners' books....

MLB Confidential: The Financial Documents Baseball Doesn't Want You To See, Part 1
We've obtained financial statements for a number of baseball teams — containing perhaps some of the most closely guarded information in sports — and they offer a rare glimpse at how MLB franchises do brisk business in the modern era....

Hire Ryno Now. I insist.
I've already admitted my Cubs fandom to you. So bear with me having to instantaneously share this info (H/T Tomuban) with you ......

Down Goes Strasburg (Sort of). Nationals' Autopsy Scheduled (Today).
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

A Tomlinson Fan Wears Adult Diapers in Brooklyn. Why?
I'd know the answer if the fan in question was Namath sans cell-phone waist-unit. But it's not....

Last Night's Loser: Drama-Loving U.S. Open Fan, Third Row
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Jason Whitlock's Explanation Interview: Live Blog (UPDATE: It's Over)
Whitlock is talking about Kansas City right now. Where is he going to take his talents next? Grab some BBQ and plop down for a few hours....

Florida Man Has Scarred Elderly Couple For Life Because He Keeps Fucking Their Horses
Best line from this fascinating news report via WCTV comes courtesy of Priscilla McDearmid: "I don't even like to have the dog out at night lately because we don't know if that man is standing over there in the corner somewhere watching."...

Cockblocked by Snow! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

All The News That's Fit To Analogize Ridiculously To Food
Your food metaphor of the day, courtesy The New York Times: "We all know the cliché that a prosecuting attorney can persuade a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich, but Clemens — and Barry Bonds, with his trial scheduled for next March — are not mere ham sandwiches but rather the prime beef of baseba...

"When Their Panties're Moist, We'll Give 'Em The Finale": One Stud's Adventures In Deca And Male Stripping
Paul Solotaroff, the guy with the pecs in the above photo, lived through the age of muscle, which on one notable occasion found our hero shimmying for horny Long Island women, his dick in a Star of David rayon sling....

Violent Bike Collision Has Quick, Polite Resolution
A guy riding his bike with a shoulder-mounted camera hits an old man. Words are exchanged. Disputation seems inevitable. Then both graciously agree on their mutual culpability and move on. Moral: Old people need to watch where the fuck they're going....

Teenage Poop Vandals Arrested At Ritzy Florida Hotel Pool
Surveillance cameras show one of the teens reaching into his pants, pulling out a turd, then having a poo party with his buddy. It will cost thousands of dollars to undoodie the damage. [ABCNews]...

'Hi, I'm Sidney And I'm Going To Get Tim Tebow Laid'
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...

Say Hello To Grandma Babs, Deadspin
Facebook contest winner Babs Claire has returned from her very special afternoon with Daulerio at Yankee Stadium. Her account, after the jump....
