ea Page 955 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Illinois Is Paying Lovie Smith A Lot Of Money For This Shit
Welcome to the Deadspin 25, a college football poll that strives to be more democratic and less useless than every other preseason poll. Leading up to the college football season kickoff, we will give you previews of the 25 teams that you, the readers, voted to be most worthy of writing about. Now, ...

List Of "Pitfalls Around College Athletics" At Minnesota Included Parking Tickets, Gang Rape<em></em>
A document discussing “football team rules” at Minnesota included a set of “pitfalls around college athletics,” which listed 15 activities as varied as getting parking tickets, not telling the truth, and gang rape. The two-page document came out today as one of the exhibits included in an independen...

Report Says Minnesota Followed The Rules In Sexual Assault Investigation, Dumps On "Weak Leadership" By Football Staff
An external review of the University of Minnesota’s sexual assault investigation last year found that the school complied with federal law and institutional policy throughout. But it also noted “weak leadership” and poor communication by the football coaching staff as partially responsible for the t...

Deadspin Up All Night: How Could I?
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let’s keep it up....

Arsène Wenger Is Sorry For All The Times He Made Arsenal Fans Cry
Arsène Wenger often talks about managing Arsenal the way old couples talk about marriage, or how parents talk about raising kids, or how other old couples talk about saying to hell with their marriage and the kids and getting a divorce—that is, he describes it as hard, thankless work that for the mo...

Wil Myers Steals 2nd, 3rd, And Home in Same Inning
Wil Myers knocked home a run with a single in the fourth inning. He’d get another run just by running around the bases....

Marco Asensio Just Wrecked Barcelona So Hard They Should Just Shut Down The Club
Here lies FC Barcelona, a formerly famed and hallowed soccer club that not too long ago was on the top of the world but through the capriciousness of one of its ex-stars, the borderline criminal mismanagement of those charged with run it, and the ruthlessly cruel manner in which their rivals Real Ma...

Ronaldo Calls Five-Match Suspension For Shoving Ref "Persecution"
After Real Madrid’s appeal of Cristiano Ronaldo’s five-match suspension for shoving a referee was denied today, the Portuguese star whined about the decision on social media, writing, “It’s impossible to stay quiet in this situation, five matches! To me it seems exaggerated and ridiculous, this is w...

Here's Everything That Happens In The Latest Leaked Episode Of <i>Game Of Thrones</i>, Which Is Bananas
Two weeks ago, the fourth episode of the current season of Game of Thrones, HBO’s hit show about relatives who smooch, leaked a few days early to the delight of fans. It was a good-ass episode, and despite the leak, it scored all-time high ratings for the show....

Why Your Team Sucks 2017: Indianapolis Colts<em></em>
Some people are fans of the Indianapolis Colts. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Indianapolis Colts. This 2017 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here....

Report: Saints Fire Team Doctors Who Misdiagnosed Player's Broken Leg
The Saints fired two team orthopedists after learning they had diagnosed cornerback Delvin Breaux with a contusion even though Breaux really has a fractured fibula, according to ESPN’s Mike Triplett....

Deadspin Up All Night: Cause And Effect
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let’s go....

What Will Everton Actually Get From Gylfi Sigurdsson?
After weeks and weeks of speculation, rumors, and false starts, it looks like Everton are finally getting their man. According to the BBC, the Toffees have agreed to a £45 million fee for Swansea midfielder Gylfi Sigurdsson. So now what?...

Reporter Accidentally Gets Jürgen Klopp To Talk About Losing His Virginity
Liverpool are currently playing the first leg of a Champions League playoff round, and things got unexpectedly sexy during manager Jürgen Klopp’s pregame press conference....

How To Fuck In The Woods, And Other Survival Tips
Today’s column is about enjoying the great outdoors....

The Good Little Teams (And Chelsea): Our 2017-18 Premier League Preview, Pt. 3
As everyone knows, the best thing about the Premier League is its absurd depth. In England you have an entire country where practically every single town worships their local club with an intensity that makes Nebraska’s passion for Cornhusker football look like Nebraska’s passion for Cornhusker socc...

Why Your Team Sucks 2017: Minnesota Vikings<em></em>
Some people are fans of the Minnesota Vikings. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Minnesota Vikings. This 2017 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here....

Here Is A Nice Sports Moment
Last night, Rockies starter Chad Bettis made his first start of the season since his testicular cancer returned in March. After weeks of chemotherapy, Bettis took the mound in front of the home crowd and shut out the Braves for seven innings, helping his team to a 3-0 win. As the bottom of the seven...

This ESPN Fantasy Football Auction Segment Is ... Yikes
I don’t know if this tone-deaf fantasy football auction segment that ESPN2 aired yesterday, with its galling resemblance to a slave auction, means that nobody involved in its production saw or understood Get Out, or if they’ve never read a history book, or if they’re all just really dumb, nor do I k...

Real Big Dumbass Writes Real Dumb Column About Michael Bennett
Sometimes you run across a column that is just so plainly stupid and written in bad faith that it’s hard to muster the indignation necessary to give it a proper critique. How do you even begin to tell the guy eating his own feces that eating his own feces is bad?...