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The Mark Cuban Gay Joke ESPN Doesn't Want You To Hear [UPDATE]
For two days, Cuban vs. Simmons was billed as the marquee event at last weekend's MIT Sloan Sports Analytic Conference, sponsored by ESPN. It certainly didn't disappoint as the two took the stage late Saturday and engaged in an hour-long discussion ranging from the NBA lockout to how teams can eng...
If You Weren't Hanging Out With Joe Buck And Dave Coulier Last Night, You're Nobody
So Joe Buck, Dave Coulier, Darren Pang, and radio guy Kelly Chase got together for last night's Blues game. And you still think the Illuminati aren't real? Wake up, sheeple. [Twitter]...
David Price Has Now Hurt His Neck Three Times By Wiping His Head With A Towel
Rays lefty David Price had to leave yesterday's split-squad start after just two innings, but he later owned up to what had happened:...
Australian Footballer Requests Time Off For "Family Issues," Attacks Cousin With A Machete
Liam Jurrah became the first person from a remote Central Australain indigenous community to play in the AFL when he was drafted by the Melbourne Demons three years ago. It was there, to the town camp of Little Sisters, that he returned last week, telling team management that he had family and commu...
Gambling Expert Calls Action On Auburn Games "Inconsistent" With Point Shaving
Yesterday, Yahoo's Charles Robinson reported that suspended Auburn point guard Varez Ward was under federal investigation for alleged point-shaving. Robinson mentioned two games that the feds were looking into—a 56-53 loss to Arkansas on Jan. 25 and a 68-50 loss to Alabama on Feb. 7. In the Jan. 25 ...
In A Shocking Development, Jerry Tarkanian Has Switched From Towels To WonderPretzels
Legendary Runnin' Rebels coach Jerry Tarkanian watched his old charges dispatch Wyoming in the Mountain West tournament last night, and in doing so revealed the source of his recently-increased girth. May we recommend he return to a diet of fiber-rich Egyptian cotton?...
Fear, Defined: PGA Golfer Hits His Drive Directly At You, And You're On Top Of A Crane
Skyjacks and other individuals who make their living at high elevation get paid well because the fear of heights—also known as acrophobia—is far from uncommon. We're also built to avoid hard objects flying at us at high speed, which is why this clip from today's WGC-Cadillac Championship round fro...
Division III Basketball Team's Leading Scorer Chooses Spring Break In Cancun Over Sweet 16 Game
The King's College Lady Monarchs booked their tickets to a women's NCAA Division III Sweet 16 game this weekend against Emmanuel in Amherst, Mass. But senior forward Paige Carlin, the team's leading scorer (11.4 ppg), already had tickets—to Cancun for Spring Break. This is going dancing in the origi...
When The Maple Leafs Went To War
Do you follow the RealTimeWWII Twitter account? You should. It's fascinating, educational, and often briefly frightening when you see something about invading Russians out of the corner of your eye....
Hot On The Trail Of Twitter's DadBoner, The Internet's Greatest Mystery
Bold flavors. Power moves. Chest beefers. A thousand beers, you guys. If any of those references are familiar to you, then you're probably one of the over 52,000 people who follow the DadBoner Twitter feed, which is probably the best Twitter feed ever written by an imaginary middle-aged Michigan man...
Mario Balotelli Does Thing
Even though he promised to stop doing Mario Balotelli things after last weekend's strip club incident, Mario Balotelli has done another Mario Balotelli thing. The Man City striker was reportedly asked to leave Manchester's Trafford Centre after refusing to take off his hood, in violation of mall rul...
<i>Silent House</i> And The Rise Of The Gimmicky Horror Movie
On Friday, the horror movie Silent House comes out. One of its selling points is that it stars Elizabeth Olsen—who was terrific last year in a very different sort of horror film, Martha Marcy May Marlene—but probably the hook that will be most intriguing to genre fans is that the whole movie takes p...
Giants Eject Angels Scout From The Ballpark, And Now Everybody's Angry
You might not realize it, but the most interesting place in the baseball universe is Scottsdale, Arizona. Last week saw a mass bee attack hold up a Giants game, and yesterday brought us our first feud of the 2012 season as Giants manager Bruce Bochy kicked out an Angels scout....
Andrew Bynum Does His Best To Let Us Know He's Not Doing His Best
So one night after they were beaten by the lowly Pistons, how exactly did the Lakers blow a 21-point lead to lose to the even lowlier Wizards? That mutiny that seems to be building among the players over coach Mike Brown? The obvious tension between Brown and Kobe Bryant? The distraction of the cons...
Some Irish Soccer Hooligans Just Couldn't Hold In Their Excitement
Every year, soccer clubs from Ireland and Northern Ireland meet in the Setanta Cup tournament to battle for local football supremacy. Sligo, the Irish side, won a 2-0 decision over Northern Ireland's Glentoran on Monday night, but the trouble started when the Glentoran fans headed back to their tour...
"It Ain't Midnight Yet, Y'all!" High School Hoops Announcer Loses His Mind Yet Again
Bravo, Brian Snow. We didn't think there was any way you could top last Friday night's trachea-shredding performance, as the Marist RedHawks hit a late three to win the 4A regional final over Curie, 63-62. No, there was no way you could top that one. ...
Hockey Dad Says He Wasn't Being Malicious When He Shined That Laser Pointer In A Little Girl's Eye
Joe Cordes, 42, admitted he shined a laser pointer onto the ice during last week's high school girls hockey game between Winthrop (Mass.) and Medway-Ashland (Mass.). The parents of the freshman goalie for Medway-Ashland had said their daughter complained of headaches afterward. Cordes, whose daughte...
Lionel Messi Is The First To Ever Score Five Goals In A Champions League Match
Barcelona made easy work of Leverkusen in the return leg of their UEFA Champions League round of 16 series, winning 7-1 (10-2 aggregate)—but it was another night to celebrate Lionel Messi, who became the first player to ever score five goals in one Champions League match and the 11th in the histo...
Excerpts From The Long-Lost Script For <em>Monday Night Football: The Cartoon</em>
So total at the time was Cosell's saturation of culture that Irwin Weiner, an ABC Sports vice president for twenty years, once came up with a concept for a Saturday morning kids' series called "Monday Night Football: The Cartoon", one that would turn Cosell, Gifford and Meredith into animated charac...
Hines Ward Signs With Ravens, Reports Pittsburgh TV Station That Fell For Obvious Parody
It’s not clear how this exclusive BroCouncil “report” could have fooled anyone, let alone that intrepid crew of news readers at WPXI-TV, who lamented Ward’s departure for the Steelers’ biggest rival at the top of their 6 a.m. newscast this morning....