el Page 2016 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

College Football In Mississippi Has Gone To The Dogs
Your morning roundup for Sept. 16, the day we found out soda fountains could be deadly. Photo via Mocksession. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Watch An Agile Woman Juggle Five Balls With Her Hands And Feet
In this video that's titled "Selyna Bogino doing the 5 balls longest routine ever! XD," Italian acrobat Selyna Bogino apparently does the 5 balls longer than anybody — woman or man — has done it before....

Stories Like This Confirm That Cleveland Needs Carl Monday Now More Than Ever
"A Cuyahoga County sheriff's deputy was charged today with menacing and public indecency stemming from two summer incidents in the Cleveland Metroparks' Rocky River Reservation. Paul Lawrence, 32, is accused of masturbating in his car on June 12 and following two women on Aug. 29, a day he had call...

Jozy Altidore Scored A Nice Goal In His UEFA Europa League Match Today
UEFA's version of the NIT hoops tournament commenced today with 24 Europa League matches. Proud American striker Jozy Altidore provided the first of four goals that AZ Alkmaar would put up on Malmö FF....

Josh Hamilton Cost An Insurance Company $500K Last Night
If you tried to check out CC Carpet Flooring and Design Center's offerings online today, you would have read this message: "Our website is currently overloaded due to GRAND SLAM activity! We apologize for the inconvenience, please try again later."...

A Running Diary Of One Of The Greatest American Rugby Performances Ever
Chris Benz and Dave Shireley will be filing dispatches from the Rugby World Cup in New Zealand, in the odd moments that they are sober. For a rugby glossary and position guide, click here....

A Rugby Glossary & Position Guide
A Deadspin primer on American football's weird, half-drunk English grandfather, rugby....

Rick Reilly Ate Gross Stuff Off Of A Carpet In The Name Of Journalistic Integrity
In August, ESPN's Rick Reilly promised to "come to your house and eat things that are stuck in your carpet" if Peyton Manning didn't start in Week 1. He didn't, and so Reilly ate popcorn off of the floor at Sun Life Stadium earlier in the week....

A Gruesome Wipe-Out Left This Surfer With Coral Lodged In Her Face
Keala Kennelly, a female pro surfer who is not—far as we know—a con artist, went under during a ride in Teahupoo, Tahiti at the end of August. She hit the reef so hard that the subsequent surgery was necessary in part to remove coral from her face. Video from the wipe-out was just released on Tues...

SprtsCntr: Picking Apart Tony Romo
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

The Indians' Shelley Duncan Made Leaping Catches At The Wall Three Straight Times Last Night
Your morning roundup for Sept. 15, the day we learned we're going to Mars. Photo via Big League Stew. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Presenting Footage Of Auburn's Eagle Mascot Crashing Into A Luxury Box Window
There are no concrete answers as to why Auburn University alum "Spirit" flew into a window at this past weekend's game against Mississippi State. As such, Harvey Updyke Jr. could have slipped it a roofie, but that would be treasonous, would it not?...

Dead Team Walking: A Night Of Suffocating Solitude With The 2011 New York Mets
I went to the Mets-Nationals game last night, and I'm not sure why. I have some idea why: first Dom taunted the staff about its lackluster Mets attendance, and then I taunted myself about September baseball. The weather in New York was splendid, too, the kind of serene, cloudless 70-degree fare that...

This Evening: Let's Have A Look At Soccer's Latest Dive Of The Year Candidate
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 14, the day we learned more than we ever wanted to know about Michael Chabon. H/T to Sportpost for the video from the Japanese K League. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Chris Carpenter Was Not Pleased With Himself After Giving Up A Game-Tying Homer Last Night (Video)
The highlight shows Derrek Lee bouncing out harmlessly to end the inning, but Andrew McCutchen had belted a two-run homer on the previous at-bat to tie the game at 4 in the seventh. Golly, Carpenter's reaction is a heckuva lot worse than what Jaws said during Monday Night Football, even if it was ...

Alexandre Pato And Leo Messi Create Some Great Goals As AC Milan And Barcelona Kick Off The Champions League Season
Cracker of a match yesterday between AC Milan and Barcelona. Alexandre Pato turned on some otherworldly speed to score for MIlan just 24 seconds after kickoff (above). Then it was Leo Messi's turn (below, with other highlights). How Messi gets in that centering pass to Pedro for the Barcelona equa...

This Is Just The Saddest Tigers Headline Ever
"Saturday's Game May Be Televised". Tiger Fever! Catch it and die!...

SprtsCntr: Milestones For The Boston, New York, And Philly Teams You Never, Ever Hear About
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Arizona State's QB Has Most Arizona State Bicep Tattoo Ever: "Live Life To It's Fullest"
This is Brock Osweiler, the 6-foot-8 starting quarterback for Arizona State. He led the Sun Devils to a 37-30 win over Missouri last Friday night, and he played a great game: He completed 24 of 32 passes for 354 yards and three TDs. When it was all over, he raised his arms to the adoring public and ...

Today In Hilarious Baseball Stat Acronym Humor
Ladies and germs, I give you Richard Griffin: "As for my view on the new generation of baseball statistics, I will just quote from the legendary R&B and soul icon Edwin Starr and his hit song for the Temptations: 'War, huh, good God. What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. Listen to me.'" [Toronto ...