el Page 2023 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Kobe Bryant To Filipina Cheerleader Who Asked For A Kiss: "Not Here"
Because, you know, there were cameras rolling and stuff. This happened a little more than a month ago, but still....

Eric Chavez Can't Quite Make The Save
Your morning roundup for Aug. 30, the day we still couldn't score seats at Fenway. Photo via tipster Adam. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Javaris Crittenton Will Turn Himself In Tonight
Put down your pitchforks, Atlantans. Javaris Crittenton, the former Georgia Tech/Lakers/Grizzlies/Wizards guard, will surrender to Atlanta police, after a brief disappearance and manhunt that landed him federal charges of unlawful flight to avoid prosecution. He's wanted in connection with an August...

Why Is Bill Belichick Stockpiling Mediocre Former Jets This Offseason?
The Patriots have a thing for acquiring former Jets to play small roles on their team. (The Jets sometimes do the same thing.) We wonder why....

Jim Tressel On Terrelle Pryor: "Love Conquers All"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Tressel will be spending his Saturdays at home for a while....

Mets Fans Now Being Hunted Down Like Dogs, By Dogs
Flushing, as a neighborhood, has a decidedly unappealing name. But Citi Field isn't actually located in Flushing. Surrounded by a bay, two freeways and a park, the Mets share their parcel of land with the little-known, less-loved neighborhood of Willets Point. With a permanent population of one, Wil...

Jamie Moyer Will Begin Rehab And Hopes To Pitch In 2012, Despite That Whole Turning 49 Years Old Thing
The Phillies have steamrolled the National League this year, and it seems like they've been doing that a lot lately. But they've done it without their soft-tossing lefty on-field mascot, Jamie Moyer, whose slow, painful, surprising march to 300 wins was undone last year by his ulnar collateral ligam...

If You Taunt Gary One More Time, He's Received Permission From His Wife To Fight You In Real Life
As we've seen with our "Life Lessons" segment, some people take sports way too seriously. But none as serious as fantasy football players. Each week, we'll feature some of the whiniest, bitchiest, nastiest, most sociopathic emails from this group of very special people so you can point and laugh at ...

Serena Williams Cannot Really Recall That Line Judge Incident From "Like, Two Years Ago"
Remember that time at the 2009 U.S. Open, when Serena Williams told a line judge she was going to shove a tennis ball down her throat? Of course you do. Everyone remembers. Except for Serena....

More Leaked Shaq Emails: "We Dnt Want Them Do What They R Doing To Tiger"
If we all thought we might be in danger of having our emails leaked to the general public, we might write our emails differently. We might, for example, not exchange hypothetical emails with our hypothetical agents asking him to cover up hypothetical stories relating our infidelity. We might, hypoth...

I-Team: A Reader Wants To Know More About The Buxom Lass Behind Home Plate At Miller Park (UPDATE)
Reader Derek writes in with a pressing question for the trusty, oft-Pulitzer-worthy Deadspin I-Team:...

Be On The Lookout For Javaris Crittenton, Because The FBI Is
Javaris Crittenton has been something of a person of interest 'round these parts, what with his hilarious inside-joke gun standoffs with Gilbert Arenas and whatnot. Most recently, he made his way to yesterday's Wake Up Deadspin post. Specifically, the "Former NBA player charged with killing mother ...

Arian Foster Really Does Not Care About Your Fantasy Team
Foster, last season's rushing champion, tweaked his left hamstring in last night's 49ers-Texans preseason game. He hurt the same hamstring earlier in camp. He appreciates your concern about his semitendinosus, unless you are concerned simply because of your fantasy team....

Manchester United Actually Kicked Arsenal's Soul's Ass Today, Too
Man U 8, Arsenal 2. That's a lot of goals. Wayne Rooney had three of them. But Ashley Young, he had a really pretty one....

Pete Rose Twitter Impostor Dupes Aaron Boone
If you don't believe that Twitter account @hit14king is actually Pete Rose, @hit14king defies you to "Call Aaron Boone and say what's up 513-226-7250 #reds #hatsoffcin #4192 its me people." ...

Brave TV Reporter Gets A Mouthful Of Sewage-Seasoned Sea Foam To Seize The Big Story
Your morning roundup for Aug. 28, the day we give a shout out to aquatic fleas. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. (Want more Tucker Barnes? Here.)...

Soccer Hooliganism In Switzerland Features A Lot Of SWAT-Team Intimidating Violence
You'd have been forgiven if you didn't think the land that gave us Roger Federer and Toblerone white chocolate was capable of bottle-throwing, stick-swinging, flare-wielding, mace-throwing, cop-scaring hooliganism....

Youth Football Coach Gets Tased Three Times After Choking A Kid, Police Find A Lot Of Ammo In His Car
Here's how Corriher-Lipe Middle School head football coach Douglas Pruitt explains what happened between assistant coach Jared Gallagher and a 12-year-old player this week in Rowan County, N.C.:...

Fine, Here's The Weather Channel Real-Dong Videobomb (NSFW)
Here's to you, Virginia Beach bros, dreaming the dream. For the record, a lot of you tipsters took the time to rewind and record this momentous occasion....

Here Are A Few Hurricane Dong Submissions, One Weather Channel Real-Dong Photobomb And A Hurricane Nipple
Make no mistake about it: National Hurricane Center Deputy Director Ed Rappaport set a very high bar for Hurricane Irene dong submissions. In fact, tipster Brian simply wrote, "The end."...