el Page 2048 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Shaq Calls Dwight Howard Beef "All Marketing," Newspaper Wonders If Cop-Out Is Attempt At Marketing
The Orlando Sentinel has spent some time today getting to the bottom of that beef we all forgot ever existed because it centered around a nickname and involved the two NBA players most closely related to Dennis the Menace, and is thus more of a semi-competitive thumb war than anything resembling tru...
How Hair Extensions Made Me A Casual Sex Goddess
You haven't had steamy sex until you've done it with long hair. After adding mid-back blonde extensions to my usual platinum pixie, I had the chance to experience sex from an entirely unique perspective that I didn't even know existed. My long blonde hair was like a dirty maid Halloween costume…you ...
The One With The NFL Wideout Sending Unsolicited Wanking Pics Of Himself
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. This space is now reserved for those scuzz-money entrepreneurs who've unsuccessfully tried to sell us prurient information. This is also where we'll run notable emails we've received from some of our readers. All emails are [sic]'d. Enjoy. ...
Azerbaijani Reporters Throw Toilet Paper, Antiquated Bathroom Device At Soccer Coach After Loss
And you thought Gregg Doyel's (silly) question was as rough as it could get in a postgame press conference....
Phillies Backup Catcher Has Contemplative Moment Facedown On Pittsburgh Bar
Journeyman catcher Dane Sardinha was seen decompressing like a champion at August Henry's early Sunday morning, which is typical behavior after anyone is forced to backstop a Kyle Kendrick emergency start. Even though Sardinha went hitless in the Phillies loss to the Pirates, he probably made solid...
Mavericks Fan Sitting Behind George Lopez Speaks For All America
Your morning roundup for June 6, the day we learned the value of Bernie Madoff's underwear. H/T @bubbaprog, proprietor of mocksession.com, for accurately predicting what might tickle us this morning (and others for sending in their own grabs)....
Man Gets Wasted At Company Softball Game, Emails Company To Brag About DUI And Getting Kicked Out Of A Bar
If you're at a corporate softball outing with alcohol, it's best not to get totally smashed in front of all your co-workers, especially if you have work the next day. If you get totally smashed and have work the next day, it's best to call it a night. If you don't call it a night, it's best to avoid...
Austrian Tennis Player Gets Lifetime Ban For Match-Fixing, Being A Huge Dick
Daniel "Crazy Dani" Köllerer has been banned from tennis for life and fined $100,000 by the ATP. Harsh. What'd he do?...
Watch Sebastien Buemi Hit A Crazy Fan With His F1 Car In Japan
Formula One driver Sebastien Buemi was in Japan at a Red Bull F1 Exhibition when a fan attempted to jump over his moving race car with predictably disastrous results. [Jalopnik]...
Chicago Columnist Wants To Raise The Rims, Is Against The Passage Of Time
Dunks made up about 7% of points scored in the 2010-11 season. That's too many, says Sun-Times columnist Rick Telander, and it's time to raise the rim by half a foot:...
It’s In The Game, Unless It’s Outside The Lines
Without fail, every time I bring up this job with folks outside the business, the topical jokes start rolling. Whatever the latest controversy or embarrassment is in sports, people ask if that's going to be simulated in the next edition… [Kotaku] ...
<em>Madden</em>'s Dynamic Performance Serves Sundays With More Flavor
Beat on a quarterback for 45 minutes of an NFL game and you'll see a different guy in the fourth quarter. Some start forcing every throw. Some will run like hell. Some go catatonic.… [Kotaku] ...
Buckeye Voices: "You Guys Remind Me Of Some Tackhead Teenage Broads With Tissue Stuffed In Their Bras"
On Monday, as Jim Tressel announced his resignation, we brought you Buckeye fans' rage-filled tweets at Ray Small. They were so angry at Small for speaking to the Ohio State student paper, The Lantern: He told them that some players "don't even think about [NCAA] rules."...
How Ford Builds The Greatest Track Day Mustang Ever
Today Jalopnik toured Ford's Flat Rock assembly plant for the BOSS 302S Mustang, the new man-of-the-track version of the Boss 302, a car they called "the best Mustang ever." Manufacturing porn is so hot. [Jalopnik]...
![Here Is A Tattoo In Which A Penis Leaking Semen Spells Out The Name Jezebel [NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18j4z4f71coyqjpg.jpg)
Here Is A Tattoo In Which A Penis Leaking Semen Spells Out The Name Jezebel [NSFW]
Happy Friday morning, everyone! You know what? We suspect this young lady might like dick! In fact, you get the idea she is really jizz-er, jazzed about shlongs! And proud of that fact. Cocky, even. Let your slut flag fly, girl! [Jezebel]...
Here's Video Of A Really Cool Goal That Wasn't Enough To Make Up For A Really Stupid Goal
In the first half of this Copa Libertadores semi-final match between Cerro Porteño vs Santos, C.P. goalkeeper Diego Baretto dove in a valiant attempt to prevent soon-to-be-Chelsea-wonderboy Neymar from scoring. Baretto dove to punch the ball away, only he dove and punched the ball back into the go...
Your National Spelling Bee Open Thread
Yeah, this is going to get MURDERED by the Finals tonight. But the Spelling Bee really is the tits. ESPN's coverage is a million times better this year, with Sage Steele instead of Erin Andrews (at least in the early rounds), and now they don't spoil the words for you before the kid starts to spel...
Cubs Pitcher Can't Break A Bat Over His Leg Unless Given Two Attempts
After watching his pitcher lose his shit after a Houston Astro struck him out, Cubs manager Mike Quade compared Carlos Zambrano to Cosmo Kramer....
Watch This Heroic Linesman Valiantly Try To Keep The Portland Timbers Undefeated At Home
Despite the best efforts of its alcoholic fans and a possibly drunk linesman, the Portland Timbers finally lost at home this past weekend. For a while, though, it looked like Portland might steal a victory from visiting DC United. That was because the refereeing crew seemed determined to give the ...
A Brief Interview With An Ohio State Fan Who Named His Kid "Tressel"
Andy Tomcho is a Cleveland native, former Ohio State student, and die-hard Buckeyes fan who, upon the arrival of his first-born son, graced him with the only name that made sense: Tressel Andrew Tomcho. Named, of course, for deified OSU football coach Jim Tressel. This was nearly two years ago, far ...