el Page 2092 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Great Qwest Field Beer Scandal Of 2011
Here's a video purporting to show that a "large" beer at Qwest Field is exactly the same amount as a "small," despite the $1.25 price difference. Drink up tomorrow, Seahawks fans....

A Former Player Responds To Roger Goodell's Open Letter
What a buzzkill. On the eve of the playoffs, just when fans' excitement in the sport is cresting, Roger Goodell tripped on his shoestrings again, puked all over his keyboard, and then hit "send."...

Dan Shaughnessy Is Awful
I'd be remiss if I didn't point out this execrable column from Dan Shaughnessy that ran on SI's website earlier this week, and is yet another triumph of idiotic Boston provincialism....

Ignore Your TV Guide; The Bengals Did Not Make The Playoffs
The CBS affiliate in Cincinnati only yesterday canceled their long-scheduled "Bengals Playoff Special," which was set to air tonight....

Last Night's Winner: Donald Sterling, Looking At Those "Beautiful Black Bodies"
Another day, another headlong plunge into the creepy racial and sexual dynamics of Donald Sterling's id. At this point, it's hard to shake the feeling that Sterling goes through life thinking he's perpetually in the back row of a Pussycat Theater....

Half-Court Buzzer Beater Not Hard Enough? Kid Does It No-Look, Backwards
This high schooler's too smooth to bother with things like aiming, following the flight of the ball, or celebrating. He's too busy contemplating the groupies he's going to plow through tonight....

Watch This Soccer Team Miss And Miss And Miss And Miss And Miss Again
A certain member of the Spoiler offices could be quite clearly heard attempting to disguise hysterical laughter by very occasionally coughing as if nothing remotely weird was happening. Just business as usual....

Let's Marvel At The Perfect Absurdity Of This ESPN Guy's HOF Ballot
Here's the ballot mailed in by Barry Stanton, ESPN news editor: Jack Morris, Edgar Martinez, Tino Martinez, Don Mattingly, B.J. Surhoff. I shit you not. B.J. Surhoff....

Freddie Mitchell Is Still Talking
Here's a delightful first-person account of "4th And 26," in which Freddie Mitchell makes it clear that he was the only person on that field who was ever any good at football. [Philadelphia Sports Daily]...

Strikeforce's Odd, Lopsided Tournament Makes A Lot Of Sense, Actually
Eight of MMA's best heavyweights will meet in an honest to god tournament. Awesome right? Until you realize that the best fighters are all on the same side of the bracket....

Cristiano Ronaldo Breaks Real Madrid Goal-Scoring Record
When you sign Cristiano Ronaldo, you don't just get an oily gentleman who looks like he belongs on the Jersey Shore, you also get goals — absolutely loads of them....

"Golden Radio Voice" Guy Has A Job Offer From The Cavs
Columbus, Ohio, homeless man Ted Williams, which is American for "Susan Boyle," apparently has been offered a home and a job doing voiceover work for the Cavs. Dreams do come true, America, just so long as they go viral first. [Business Insider]...

Even The ESPN Announcers Were Tired Of Watching That Orange Bowl
ESPN3's online feed does away with commercials entirely, leaving dead silence in their place. Except sometimes they forget to cut the announcers' mics, leading to awkward exchanges like last night's between Jaws, Gruden and Tirico....

LeBron Bashed For Saying Good Things About His Coach Now
Erik Spoelstra was named Eastern Conference coach of the month after the Heat's turnaround. LeBron responded. Not since Descartes, or perhaps Clinton, have so few words been vivisected so utterly and completely....

Just Vote For Jeff Bagwell, You Hypocrites
Jerod Morris idly wondered if Raul Ibanez might've had a little pharmaceutical help, and everyone went nutso. Damien Cox suggested Jose Bautista's numbers were surprising, and he caught shit. So why is it OK to not vote for Bagwell because of "suspicions?"...

All Of Edin Dzeko’s Goals From Last Season … In 2-D!
Unless people are making it all up for a laugh, the big news is that the robed men at Man City have splurged another £30 million on hot European property — this time, Edin Dzeko of playing-for-Wolfsburg fame....

Clarification: Ron Franklin Called Jeannine Edwards "Sweet Baby," Not "Sweet Cakes"
Sweet baby? What the hell is that? Who calls anyone "sweet baby," outside of Boyz II Men songs? This makes Ron Franklin both patronizing and weird. [USA Today; earlier]...

Not A Great Day For Peter King
First he discovers (and describes in detail) this newfangled drinking game called "keg standing," or something. Then he makes an unfortunate pun on Arian Foster's name. He's taking this Favre thing hard....

Phil Jackson Says Allegedly Mean Thing About Kobe Bryant In Language Resembling English
The Sporting News thinks Kobe and Phil Jackson are now trading "barbs." I dunno. Maybe this sounded a lot more cutting in the original Swedish?...

SportsCenter Anchors Celebrate Eric Mangini Getting Fired
We know it's exciting that the Mangenius is gone in Cleveland, but that's no reason for Hannah Storm and Adam Schefter to high-five over it. They quickly apologized, but still: high-five!...