el Page 2217 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

What To Expect From "Hard Knocks: Cincinnati Bengals"
The Cincinnati Bengals are not quite the trainwreck they once were, but everyone is still hoping for some kind of entertainment value out of this year's edition of HBO's "Hard Knocks" docudrama. Don't get your hopes up....

ESPN Safeguards Our Delicate Sensibilities
More inane self-censorship: "When ESPN replayed both of these guys [Lou Piniella and Shane Victorino] screaming their profanities," Mike Pesca notes on Slate's sporting podcast (the ego to the Deadcast's id), "they blurred or pixelated" their mouths. Fuck that. [Slate]...

Don't Even Think About Posting Stolen Baron Davis Photos
Baron Davis' laptop was stolen and he would really like it back. But just to be safe, his lawyer is preemptively threatening to sue the ass off anyone who publishes the personal photos and videos that might be on it....

Pittsburgh Steelers Love Their Illegal Gun-Shooting Parties (UPDATED)
Hackles have been raised by photos of a shooting event where civilians, including members of the Pittsburgh Steelers, are seen goofing off with possibly illegal weapons—all courtesy of the Pennsylvania State Police. Hey, gun safety is for Seahawks....

Brady Quinn-Derek Anderson Feud Gets Catty
Derek Anderson and Brady Quinn are both listed as No. 1 on the Browns depth chart, although I don't believe the NFL's plan to add a second football to gameplay will take effect this year. So let the sabotage begin!...

Slapfight!
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Let's All Watch The Media Fumble Helplessly On The Pitino Story
So, obviously, this is the only story today. But is anyone else finding it odd how it's being covered? Go ahead, do a Google News search. "Pitino Paid For Woman's Abortion." Every headline is some variant of that....

For A Brief Moment, The College Football World Was Turned On Its Head
Our thanks to all 8,358 of you who sent in this screengrab (click to enlarge), which depicts Bruce Feldman, ESPN The Magazine's college football savant, fearlessly forecasting the Florida Atlantic Owls into the national title game....

Leitch-Hating Matador Records Co-Owner Loses Home In Fire
Gerard Cosloy, indie-music maven and proprietor of sporty blog Can't Stop The Bleeding, posted the photo you see here, writing: "This was a hell of a way to get out of hoovering the living room." Condolences. [CSTB, via Steady Burn]...

Deion Sanders' Mom Is A First Amendment Hero
The amazing thing about this isn't that cops stupidly slapped handcuffs on a sportswriter apparently for the crime of doing his job in casual wear. The amazing thing is that he was arrested because he tried to interview Deion Sanders....

Nationals' Unexpected Success Sends <em>Washington Post</em> Into A Fugue State
The lede to yesterday's game story: "In the coda of the Passacaglia and Fugue in C minor, composer Johann Sebastian Bach repeats the same chord sequence over and over again, leading the listener to anticipate one resolution ..." [Washington Post]...

Vick Speaks To James Brown
Michael Vick has recorded his first post-jail interview with James Brown and it will air on "60 Minutes" this Sunday. (As heard on "The Leitch/Daulerio FunTime Hour"!) Perfect for family dinner-time viewing. [CBS]...

Alert: Whitlock, Leitch, Daulerio Sharing Pleasantries On Popular Radio Program
Go listen now. UPDATE: It's over. The nation returns to DEFCON 4. Leitch's verdict: "That went well. He didn't yell at us at all." [DanPatrick.com]...

All The Umpires Must Be Shot
Victorino's inexplicable ejection prompted Sporting Blogger, Dan Levy, to seethe: "Somewhere along the way in, umpires forgot the game isn't about them. They stand on the field to call balls and strikes, out and safe, and that's it" [SportingBlog]...

Johnny Narron: His Tongue Deviseth Mischiefs
On Friday, I spoke with Johnny Narron, the Rangers' special assignment coach and Josh Hamilton's devoutly religious "accountability partner." He was gracious, forthright and apparently full of crap....

Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: "The Football Fan's Manifesto"
Today's a glorious day. Michael Tunison aka Kwanzaa Primate's utterly fantastic book has arrived and he's graciously given us an excerpt. Plus! He's here to live chat with you. Buy it then pepper him with inane questions....

Linda Cohn Bravely Tests The ESPN Social Networking Policy
60,000 Cohn Heads. Now there ain't but 20,000 Bristol police in the whole town... can you dig it? [The Rookies]...

If Mike Vick Is Repentant, He'll Never Tell
Michael Vick made an appearance at a Humane Society event yesterday, but don't expect to hear an inspiring message of redemption. Don't expect to hear it at all. Vick's talk wasn't for the community: it was for his own gain....

It's Always Surly In Philadelphia
To the shock of precisely no one, the real action in last night's UFC 101 was in the crowd, as every Philadelphian tried to fight every other Philadelphian. Winner: you!...

Why Sports Wives Don't Remain Sports Wives For Too Long
In the non-news category, professional athletes divorce far more often than the national average. The real question is why do they bother getting married in the first place?...