emo Page 49 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The First <i>Mission: Impossible </i>Movie Is Very '90s And Very Necessary
There has never been a bad Mission: Impossible movie. They’ve all been ridiculous. They’ve all strained credulity. They’ve all had dense, convoluted plots that don’t really stand up to any scrutiny. They’ve all functionally served as Tom Cruise stunt reels, the plots reduced to incoherent connective...
José Mourinho Is Shitting On Managers Again, Which Means Soccer's Back!
We’ve seen preseason play and preseason brawls, and now that José Mourinho has broken out the ol’ charcoal grill and laid on a couple thick slabs of Arsène Wenger and Manuel Pellegrini tenderloin, the aroma of preseason beef means the Premier League season is just around the corner....
Robert Allenby Fired His Caddie Midway Through His Round
Robert Allenby got into a heated argument over club selection with his caddie Mick Middlemo just four holes into his first round at the RBC Canadian Open yesterday, culminating in screaming, cursing, and Middlemo being fired right there on the course, leading Allenby to pull a fan out of the gallery...
Five Years Ago Today, Bengie Molina(!) Hit For The Cycle
Baseball’s still on a break, so take a second to remember an unexpected feat that happened five years ago today: Bengie Molina hit for the damn cycle....
And Now, The Only Comic-Con Story You'll Ever Need
It’s the early 2000s, and I’m working at a bar across the street from the convention center where Comic-Con is held. At the time, Comic-Con was big, but the locals hadn’t embraced it and its multitude of people who can recite every episode title of The X-Files in sequential order, the way they have ...
Reports: GM Jerry Dipoto Forced Out in Anaheim
Jerry Dipoto has learned an inviolable rule of working for the Angels: get into a power struggle with Arte Moreno’s guy, and you’re not going to win it. According to multiple reports, the Anaheim GM resigned and packed up his office last night....
NBA Draft Picks Choose Their Favorite Emoji; Justise Winslow Wins
Before last night’s draft, a handful of NBA prospects were asked for their favorite emoji. There were clear winners and losers....
Fire Don Lemon (Into The Sun)
Last night, CNN host Don Lemon succeeded in doing what he sets out to do every night, garnering attention for the news network that vastly overpays him to pose the question, “But what if this indefensible position isn’t wrong—or at least isn’t as wrong as you think?” He held up a Confederate flag, a...
Orem Owlz PR Guy: I Had Nothing To Do With "Caucasian Heritage Night"
Former Orem Owlz media director Joey Zanaboni says he stepped down after only two weeks on the job due to the team’s refusal to reconsider “Caucasian Heritage Night”—only to see the team eventually relent after public scorn and mockery....
Utah Minor League Team Cancels Planned "Caucasian Heritage Night"
The Orem Owlz canceled a planned “Caucasian Heritage Night” after the Angels’ Rookie League affiliate found itself in the center of controversy over the ill-chosen promotion. The team’s media director also resigned as a result of the backlash. The team offered this attempt to explain the promotion:...
Who Wants A Pontiac Silverdome Urinal Autographed By Barry Sanders?
Here’s a sound purchase for any Detroit Lions fan: A urinal from the Pontiac Silverdome, autographed by Barry Sanders. With the auction’s opening bid set at a mere $500, it’s an opportunity that can’t be passed up....
The Best <i>Entourage</i> Cast Outtakes From Their <i>GQ</i> Cover Story
Earlier this week, GQ posted a big profile I did of the Entourage cast for their upcoming movie. As always, there was plenty of juicy shit that couldn’t make its way into the final piece, like Jeremy Piven’s thoughts on In-N-Out Burger, which are very important for you to know about. You can read ma...
José Mourinho Burns Premier League Rivals In Funny Award Speech
Nobody does smug satisfaction better than this guy. Even if this was obviously written by someone else, it’s that textbook José Mourinho delivery that makes it all worthwhile....
If You Grill All These Foods On Memorial Day, The Planets Will Align
Cold fusion. Mars colonization. A cure for cancer. Peace on earth. Cute li’l goals, I guess, if you’re looking for a self-esteem boost. ...
Nick, The Cubs Threw Out Your Grandma’s Personalized Brick
Nick, my man, we have some bad news. Remember when your sweet grandma bought a commemorative brick to be placed outside of Wrigley Field, one that would stand as a testament to her love for you and the Cubbies forever? Well, the Cubs just made a sucker out of your sweet grandma, because they threw t...
Gennady Golovkin Pounds Willie Monroe Jr., Wins By Sixth-Round TKO
Scariest Man Alive Gennady Golovkin extended his undefeated record to 33-0 with a TKO of Willie Monroe Jr. in a bout that continues the legend of the Kazakh middleweight. Some analysts expected a more competitive fight, given Monroe’s 19-1 record and that Golovkin’s last fight, against Martin Murray...
Dipshit Mets Fan Throws Beer At Grady Sizemore
Here’s a dipshit Mets fan spending $12 in a futile attempt to disrupt Phillies right fielder Grady Sizemore from fielding a ball in the fourth inning at Citi Field today. Stop wasting beer, dipshit!...
The Angels Remain Unhappy That They Have To Pay Josh Hamilton
The Angels just can’t hide their disappointment about having to continue to pay Josh Hamilton. Last night, before the Angels home opener, owner Arte Moreno told the assembled reporters that there was a relapse clause in Hamilton’s contract, and that the team was debating whether to invoke it. Moren...
Fix The New ESPN.com Annoyances With This Greasemonkey Script
One of the biggest complaints about the new ESPN.com layout is that clicking a live score at the top of the homepage no longer takes you to the box score, but instead a live Game Tracker that takes time to load and generally isn’t something anyone actually wants to see. Reader William has remedied t...