emo Page 69 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Help Awful Announcing Decide Who's Just As Awful As Joe Morgan
Awful Announcing will remove Joe Morgan from the Lincoln spot on its Mt. Rushmore of awful announcers. They'll replace him with the readers' choice in a 32-person summer tournament. Today: Reilly-Harrelson and Paige-Bayless. Go forth exercise your right! [Reilly-Harrelson, Paige-Bayless]...
Celebrate Independence Eve By Watching A Cute Kid Allow The First Fish He Ever Caught To Live Another Day
Teddy's dad Mike sent this link in earlier this afternoon. He thought you might like to see it. So, now presenting "Teddy catching his first fish ever, naming it 'Free' and releasing it back to the wild."...
Let's Check In With Mork "Hunting Bait" Encino
Now that word is out that $12,000 will allegedly afford you the right to spend 24 hours hunting a naked Mork Encino, he's none too worried about the fact that somebody claims to have GPS-located where the pictures on his website HuntMe4Sport.com were taken. Here's what had to say via email yesterda...
Intel Executive Wonders Moronically "What Intel Can Learn from Miami Heat's Recent Loss"
Let's watch a bunch of Intel employees draw a lot of silly corporate lessons from the failure of one really good basketball team to beat another really good basketball, shall we? First, here's an executive's blog post, written on the company's internal site and passed along by a tipster. We've left ...
The Right Place At The Right Time: Remembering Lorenzo Charles
In the photographs of that moment, he doesn't show an expression of power, of joy, of triumph or even relief. His eyebrows are arched back, his eyes are wide, his face drawn into a grimace. N.C. State's Lorenzo Charles does not look like a man dunking a basketball, but rather a man returning to Eart...
Channing Crowder's Jersey And The NCAA's Land Of Make Believe
Channing Crowder talks in hypotheticals. "Hypothetically," he says, he doesn't have any more of his old Florida jerseys. Some local businessmen, he says, really liked his play. "Hypothetically."...
Dead Wrestler Of The Week: Brian "Crush" Adams
An occasional feature in which we honor the sport's fallen and examine their legacies. Today: Brian "Crush" Adams, who died in 2007 after accidentally ingesting a lethal mixture of prescription drugs....
Somebody Tried To Sneak Past Security At Ryan Dunn's Memorial Service This Afternoon
No, the Westboro Baptist Church did not live up to its promise to "picket any public memorial/funeral held for [Ryan] Dunn, warning all not to make a mock of sin, & to fear and obey God" this afternoon. So, it can be argued that God does not, in fact, hate Jackass co-stars who drive really, really ...
RIP Clarence Clemons
"Clarence Clemons, the saxophonist in Bruce Springsteen's E Street Band, whose jovial onstage manner, soul-rooted style and brotherly relationship with Mr. Springsteen made him one of rock's most beloved sidemen, died Saturday at a hospital in Palm Beach, Fla. He was 69." [New York Times]...
Filthy Rich Kids Allowed To Sell Lemonade Outside U.S. Open For Charity After All
On Thursday, the heartless Montgomery County, Md. inspections office ordered a gaggle of children — including some from the Marriott-hotel and Lockheed-Martin clans — to close their lemonade stand right outside Congressional Country Club. The kids said they were raising money for pediatric-cancer r...
How A Regular Angels Fan Found Himself In The Owner's Private Bathroom
The Orange County Register has the cool story of how Mike Langdon, pump salesman, found himself in Arte Moreno's suite. If you guessed it involved four-time AL All-Star (ed note: really?) Mark Langston, well, you're right. But we'll get there....
The Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum Is A Nexus Of Depravity
Now that USC has vacated its 2004 national championship because Reggie Bush couldn't steer clear of the side money, attention has shifted to the venue where the Trojans have had such success in recent years. As it turns out, the L.A. Coliseum has been run more or less like a garbage removal service ...
Montana Quarterback Nate Montana Arrested For DUI In Montana
Hannah is not a suspect. [The Missoulian]...
Shane Mosley Wanted To Throw In The Towel Against Manny Pacquiao
Mosley has never quit a fight. Hell, he's never lost a fight without going the distance. But here's Sugar Shane, late in his fight against Pacquiao, begging his corner to throw in the towel. (This Philippine newspaper says it's the tenth round.)...
Deadspin Classic: Here Are Some Really Happy Dogs Welcoming Soldiers Home
This post originally ran on Veterans Day 2010. No less affecting today....
Being Captain Of The Saint John Sea Dogs Does Not Entitle You To Spit In Memorial Cup, But Watch This Guy Do It Anyway (UPDATE: ?)
Your morning roundup for May 30, Memorial Day, the day we learned the Groupon Voice. Video via tipster Brent, who writes (with a French BlackBerry signature appended!), "Watch beardo spit into the Memorial Cup. His teammates will be drinking out of it. Fucking gross."...
Dead Wrestler Of The Week: Miss Elizabeth (Deadspin Classic)
"Macho Man" Randy Savage was killed today in a car accident. Last year, our pro wrestling correspondent paid tribute to Savage's manager and first wife, Miss Elizabeth. She died in 2003 of an overdose at the home of her boyfriend, Lex Luger....
CBS Also Passes On Awful Sitcom About Mark Schlereth's Life
CBS revealed its 2011-12 primetime schedule today. We already knew it would lack the wretched Colin Cowherd pilot, but we now know that it doesn't have that god-awful Schlereth show either....
America Mercifully Spared From Awful Sitcom About Colin Cowherd's Life
Tweeted Cowherd, "Network passed on my sitcom. On to plan B. In talks with Charlie Sheen for new show 'Almost Winning.' Taste that CBS."...
Everything You Wanted To Know About Porn, Weed, And Toilets In Afghanistan, Courtesy A Platoon Leader
That photo of an anonymous U.S. soldier standing in front of a whole shitload of weed was taken by a platoon leader in Afghanistan with the Gawker handle Lono. He emailed me recently to clarify a number of things about fighting overseas, namely the quality of local porn, the abundance of local weed,...