et Page 1967 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Milan Lucic To Cop Questioning Him About A Fight With His Girlfriend: "Do You Know Who I Am?"
Bruins forward Milan Lucic was not charged after allegedly having an altercation with his girlfriend the other night in which he was "highly intoxicated and hostile," according to this report in the Boston Herald. In fact, the girlfriend told police she was "adamant about not being harmed." Police ...

Phillies OF John Mayberry, Jr. Has Requested That His Agents Set Him Up With The Sexy Mermaid From <i>Pirates Of The Caribbean</i>
John Mayberry, Jr. is a man who knows what he wants. One cannot, after all, become the Phillies' best pinch-hitter without knowing what he wants. But Mayberry is still missing something. Evidently, that something is the Sexy Mermaid from Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides....

Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Plagued By Indecision
Bartolo Colon, the Yankees' veteran pitcher and embodiment of struggle against the all-consuming void, pitched again on Saturday. Or did he? He came in on a three-game losing streak; the Yankees won; he is still on a three-game losing streak. His line: 6.1 IP, 7 H, 4 R, 7 K, 1 BB, 2 HR....

A Reminder: Rick Reilly Promised To Eat Things Stuck In Your Carpet If Peyton Manning Didn't Start Game 1
Rick Reilly, Aug. 30: "Peyton Manning will keep his streak alive. If you think he's going to miss a start because of a neck problem, you've been chugging paint thinner. This guy hasn't missed a start since 1994 at Tennessee. Do you know how long ago it was when Manning didn't start for the Colts? Go...

Listen As Mardy Fish Calls Jo-Wilfried Tsonga A "Dumbass" During Their U.S. Open Match
Fish doesn't speak French, you see. Though it was Tsonga who eventually ousted Fish, the highest-seeded American, in five sets yesterday....

ESPN's Fantasy Guru Thinks "Rapelisberger" Is Worth Having As Your QB
A reader named John helpfully screen-grabbed this tweet from ESPN fantasy expert Eric Karabell, which John said had appeared on the ESPN fantasy football page for a bit last night, at least until Karabell saw fit to delete it. Granted, Karabell was just answering a question about going with Vick or ...

Rob Ryan On Rex's Foot Fetish: "Naw, I Mean Hell, He Is A Little Freaky I Guess"
You may have read about the possible foot-fetish-filmin' proclivities of New York Jets head coach Rex Ryan. He likes feet, Deadspin told you last December, and then Wes Welker joked about it while Ryan wouldn't talk about it....

Former Louisville Basketball Player Breaks Leg In Most Horrific Way Possible (Video)
Edgar Sosa, a former Louisville guard who's now playing for John Calipari's Dominican Republic team in the FIBA Americas Championship, broke his leg after going up for a shot in a game against Panama today. There's video here of the break itself and a look at the totally unnatural state of Sosa's ...

Deadspin Classic: Meet The Mets' Sad Fan
The New York Mets are 13.5 games out of first in the NL East, and potential owner David Einhorn has gone the traditional route and quit on the club. It is, as usual, a bad time to be a sad Mets fan. With that in mind, we look back at the saddest of the sad Mets fans: Seth Fleischauer, the self-procl...

Ron Artest Has Never Looked More Graceful
Your morning roundup for Sept. 5, the day Arizona (against all odds) got a little bit worse. Photo of Artest at rehearsal via @LakerNation. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Florida A&M Basketball Player Fatally Stabbed, Apparently By Her Girlfriend
Shannon Washington, an All-American transfer who was expected to play point guard for the Florida A&M University women's basketball team this season, died early today after being stabbed in the neck during an argument in her Tallahassee apartment. A 20-year-old woman visiting her was arrested and c...

Here's The Memorable Part Of Auburn's Otherwise Forgettable Fourth Quarter Against Utah State Today
The first game in Auburn's Post-Cam Newton Era (also known as the Barrett Trotter Era, according to the game announcers) did not go as expected—unless you expected Auburn to require a last-minute comeback to avoid a 10-point loss to unranked Utah State. Here's the onside kick and the ensuing drive...

We're Sick Of Joe Theismann All Over Again
It's difficult not to pity Redskins fans, who, in addition to being Redskins fans, have to hear Joe Theismann talk about preseason football during preseason television broadcasts. And last night, just after Brandon Banks ended an otherwise splendid punt return by flipping the ball out of his hand ...

The Italian Basketball Team Will Run Circles And Circles And Circles And Circles Around Everyone At EuroBasket
This clipboard belongs to Simone Pianigiani, the head coach of the Italian national basketball team, and we're told that it almost always resembles a toddler's masterpiece (and, yes, possibly an unintentional dong as well)....

Watch As Clay Hensley Takes Out His Frustration On A Water Bucket
It was only the third inning and the Marlins were still winning, but there were still no outs when Clay Hensley hit Ruben Tejada with a pitch and walked Lucas Duda with the bases loaded. After Hensley's 1-1 pitch to David Wright nearly sailed into Wright's chest, Jack McKeon just couldn't take it an...

The Wall Street Journal Counted How Many Times Mike Pelfrey Licked His Pitching Hand Tuesday Night
And the answer, over the course of six-plus innings, is 89. The story also notes that "there are two variations of the Pelfrey lick," though it doesn't go so far as to actually chart the two-finger and four-finger versions. [WSJ]...

There's A Campaign To Keep Nickelback From Performing At The Winnipeg Jets' First Game, Because Nickelback Sucks
No one knows why, but far too many dim marketing morons get paid ungodly amounts of money to "entertain" us at sporting events by hiring your mom's idea of a rockin' band. And just when you thought it couldn't get any worse than the NFL's decision to have Kid Rock, Lady Antebellum, and Maroon 5 rin...

Bruce Feldman On Leaving ESPN: "In The Last Six Weeks, I've Seen What They're Capable Of" (UPDATED)
After 17 years at ESPN, where he was one of the first hires for the WWL's website once upon a time, college football writer Bruce Feldman announced today that he was leaving for a gig at CBSSports.com. He also made an appearance this morning on Dan Patrick's radio show and spoke freely about what w...

The Guy Who Wanted To Own The Mets, Like Everyone Else Ever Involved With The Team, Has Quit On The Mets
David Einhorn, the baby-faced assassin who would be extorting the snakebitten Wilpons all the way to the bank, will not be controlling the Mets for a dollar. He will not, in fact, own any part of the Mets....
