et Page 1988 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We Are All Dave McKenna CI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit expires like an old bag of airline peanuts....

Joe Girardi Explains Growing Old Together To Jorge Posada While His Mistress Bats Leadoff
A play, courtesy of the New York Yankees, in six vexing acts:...

And Now, More White Baseball Players Trying To Do The Bernie In Unison
For some reason, tipster Heidi H. felt it necessary to send a follow-up last night's DUAN! video of white dudes dancing. Heidi's entry may be more, what's the word, creepy in that it's a lot of guys writhing in close proximity in a locker room....

When AC Milan Won The Italian Soccer Title, A Player Paid Homage To Michael Jackson
First, it was a hideous statue outside English Premier League team Fulham's stadium. Now, Michael Jackson continues exerting posthumous control over the living world of soccer; this time, Kevin Prince Boateng of AC Milan did a damn good impression as AC Milan celebrated winning the Scudetto (aka S...

Evan Longoria Didn't Really Make This Life-Saving Catch
If you're willing to believe this video is real, "Gillette Young Gun" Evan Longoria of the Tampa Bay Rays saved a lady reporter from getting her brains knocked out of her right ear, with four perfectly framed "Gillette" signs in the background. But you don't believe this video is real, do you? Goo...

A Walk-On Who Made the Team Wants You to Know What It Really Means
Alex Howell was the only freshman in the tunnel that Saturday, his chinstrap so tight it fused his jaw shut, 89,000 people packed into to the last row at Auburn's Jordan-Hare Stadium. Earlier in the week the graduate assistant… [Kotaku] ...

Roger Federer Lost, But He Still Managed To Do Something Only Roger Federer Can Do
Roger Federer dropped his third round Italian Open match, 4-6, 7-6 (2), 7-6 (4), to Richard Gasquet yesterday. "I definitely feel I should never have lost this match," Federer said afterwards. "I just couldn't come up with the shots." This one, of all shots, he came up with....

When Is A Choke Not A Choke? A Premature Requiem For The Sharks
This is an existential question that should be on every Sharks fan's mind today: is it even a choke if everyone's expecting you to choke?...

TV Is A Helluva Drug: On Jay Mariotti And The Sportspersona Machine
The tale of Jay Mariotti, as sad and vile as it may be on the surface, isn't entirely unique. During his interview with Fox's Jason Whitlock months ago, Mariotti played off the first set of allegations as an isolated moment of rage (he was trying to "help the person [his girlfriend]," he said), an...

Basketball Training Of The Future Is Terrifying And Nauseating
Our French tipster Antoine sent this in with the subject line "ro basketball team training with robots," perhaps because he's aware of our constant fear of the Robot Uprising. But the Futuroscope that helped Poitiers Basket 86 develop their spatial recognition or some such nonsense doesn't inspire...

Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread
The Miami Heat can put the Celtics down like a mangy mutt that was good for about a fifth of its lifetime tonight. And you know what? Good for Team Olbermann. And good for the United States of America. Rondo might as well have smeared some of Schilling's ketchup on his jersey....

Rockies Grounds Crew Member Trapped Under Tarp, No One Notices
Last night, just three weeks after the Royals grounds crew nearly lost one to the tarp, the rain delay at the Mets-Rockies game carved a new swathe of destruction at Coors Field. There were no men lost; only a hero made....

Patrick Kane's Offseason Begins With A Black Eye, Taking A Girl Home From A Club
Oh Kaner. We take a lot of shit for giving you shit, but you keep giving us shit to give you shit for....

Why Hockey Has Gone Totally Gay For The Latest Homophobia Debate
Hockey, for a sport that's nominally proactive in areas ranging from replay to concussions, has never been especially progressive. No one expects the openly gay pro athlete, the inevitable big story for the next decade, to come from the NHL. While other leagues have John Amaechi and Billy Bean and E...

Watch The "JetMan" Fly Across The Grand Canyon
Yves "JetMan" Rossy, a Swiss "pilot, inventor and aviation enthusiast," has a custom-made human jet suit, and today he flew 200 feet over the Hualapai Reservation on the Grand Canyon. How's your Tuesday going?...

Phil Jackson Agrees That His Career Has Been The "Bee's Knees"
Your morning roundup for May 9, the day we learned of the Village tree thief....

The Lakers Had A Group Meltdown In Honor Of Phil Jackson's Final Game
Let's avoid speculating about why the Lakers are avoiding Kobe Bryant on the court, and why Pau Gasol broke it off with his girlfriend, and how those two things may or may not be related and may or may not have lead to this 4-0 sweep, and just point out that Los Angeles played like a team — despit...

After Mendenhall, Scoop Jackson Provides A Handy Guide To ESPN's Corporate Twitter Policy
Rashard Mendenhall wrote some thoughtless shit on Twitter after Bin Laden's death last week. Whatever you think about American military operations, or the popular reaction to the US mission, it's fair to say that Mendenhall's tweets didn't represent an athlete's thoughtful examination of jingoism ...

The <em>New York Times</em> Pushes Up Its Glasses, Issues Nerdiest Correction Ever
I'll just let the Times explain:...

The Pacquiao/Mosley Fight Ended Up Being NASCAR's Undercard Last Night
Your morning roundup for May 8, the day we watched the world's terroristic boogeyman watching himself and channel surfing like an Ritalin-addled preteen whose parents won't spring for a DVR....