et Page 2099 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Russian Billionaires Are NBA's Last Hope
All New Jersey Nets owner Bruce Ratner wants to do is get the Nets out of New Jersey and plant them in the heart of Brooklyn, but he's missing one key ingredient. What's it called? Oh right...money. He has none....

The One Where Tim Tebow Gets Cornholed
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

Psycho T Found Your Dog!
Tyler Hansbrough—and a Andy Katz doppelganger—will find your lost puppy through the magic of social networking (and AT&T! What a great corporate partner!) It's a shame that this doesn't violate any NCAA rules. [Rush The Court]...

It's Bizarro Phillies Dad!
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...

LeBron Conquers Hollywood, One Wacky Hijink At A Time
The geniuses behind "City Slickers 2" are penning "Fantasy Basketball Camp," starring LeBron James. You might have seen this story already today, but it gives me an excuse to run this photo. [Ain't It Cool News]...

Young College QBs Beleaguered By Crazy Fans With Cell Phones And Internet Access
The nation's paper of record did a terrifying feature about the downside of being a high profile college quarterback and the deadly pitfalls the new media era of Twitter, Facebook, and, ahem, Deadspin....

The Charles Rogers Comeback Hits Another Snag
The former Spartan/Lion was found slumped over in his Mercedes—which was running and still in gear—and was arrested for DUI last night. Or DU Parking. Clearly, he was too drunk to be drunk driving. [Fox]...

Cowboys Could Set Attendance Record, Still Get Blacked Out
The Cowboys have sold over 20,000 standing-room tickets for their official stadium opener Sunday and have a shot to break the NFL attendance record....if only they can can convince a few people to buy actual seats....

Hello There, Little Ball
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Tim Tebow To Remain In Florida The Rest Of His Natural Life?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Expository Writing
Hi everyone! Did you guys say you wanted us to write another thing about Derek Jeter? Okay! Your funeral!!!...

Adrian Peterwho?
Sure, we don't know our football all that well. But that's actually part of the reason we feel pretty justified calling bullshit on Tom Curran's list of "Five Players Ready to Become NFL Superstars."...

"What-If" The "What-If"
Steroids steroids steroids, you crazy son of a bitch. What have you gone and done now? You've made Gene Wojciechowski write this little bit of insanity....

Jesus Is The Derek Jeter Of Christianity
He's good at what he does (for Jeter, it's baseball; for Jesus, it's healing the sick or whatever). People love him. He says and does the right things at all the right times....

Food Metaphor Of The Year
"In the Boston cookbook, most of its tasty concoctions based on defensive ingredients, Kessel is viewed as that little sprig of parsley that makes the plate look better but really doesn't factor into whether the meal is a true success."...

In A Time Of Mourning, Our Nation Turns Its Eyes To Jair Jurrjens
Earlier this summer, as you already know, pop culture icons Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett died on the same day in a tragic and unexpected murder suicide....

The Utterance Of This Word Should Be Punishable By Death
Let's get one thing straight: I'm not going to break any new ground here. I'm not going to teach you anything new about baseball. I'm not going to cause you to reassess how you think about sports journalism....

Welcome Letter
Awwww shit, y'all – get out your slide rules and hide your daughters, because the bad boys of the internet are back! FJM in the motherhumping hizzzzzzzyyyyyyyyyyy!...

FCC Is Still Worried About Janet Jackson's Boob
It's been almost six years since that horrible day when America first learned about the female breast and the Federal Communications Commission is still trying to find a way to punish someone for the infamous Super Bowl Nipple Fest....
