et Page 2122 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Brett Favre Victimized By Improv Comedy Group
New York Giants lineman David Diehl makes his comedy club debut by mocking Brett Favre—and doing a pretty good job of it, actually. It was such a spot on impersonation that he even told his jokes to the wrong audience. Video below....

Cricket Player Sidelined Due To Violent Case Of The G-dubs
"The medical board has reported that Shoaib Akhtar was suffering from genital viral warts and the wound needs further care and treatment for another 10 days," the PCB said in a statement."[GuardianUK]...

Yuk It Up, Stoners. The Olympics Torch Looks Like A Doob.
At left is the official torch of the 2010 Vancouver Olympics, and, yes, I realize it looks like someone rolled up half of Humboldt County in the world's biggest Zig Zag....

Jeter On The Lam After Bank Robbery, Support Of PatriotsBlue Jays
Chad Floyd Jeter is wanted by police after allegedly robbing a bank in Alabama, while wearing a New England PatriotsBlue Jays cap misidentified by Alabama police as a Patriots hat. (Who did you think I was talking about?) He is considered armed and dangerously clutch. [Wicked Good Sports]...

La La Vazquez Says Dallas Fans Have Racist Family Values
So the Dallas-Denver brouhaha is not going away. La La Vazquez is still talking about her long night in Big D, only the language is getting much more colorful. She says fans were throwing around words like "bastard" and "fuck" and that one that even I won't spell without asterisks....

Raiders Come To Terms With Fast, Toolsy Budget Airliner
The Raiders are teaming up with "low-budget, long-haul" Air Asia X and sticking their logo on the tailfin of an aircraft, now dubbed the "Commitment To Excellence" plane. A sad metaphor waiting to happen. [Examiner]...

Fake Ben Roethlisberger Has Internet Cancer
Terrible news, everybody. The cyber weirdo who is trolling the internet pretending to be Ben Roethlisberger has imaginary cancer. There's a PayPal link below where you can help send him an virtual bouquet of AOL sign-up CDs....

Mark Sanchez Got More Than Free Trunks Out Of That Photo Shoot
You know Jets hunk Mark Sanchez and Hilary Rhoda, that super duper model who he was rubbing up against in his GQ photo shoot? Yeah, they're totally doing it now. [NY Post]...

Who Won The WWE-Denver Nuggets Cage Match?
World Wrestling Entertainment is moving next's Monday's "RAW" session from Denver's Pepsi Center to L.A.'s Staples Center, because of the conflict with Game 4 of the NBA Finals. But which petulant business owner really comes out as the victor here?...

Pirates Tour White House, For Some Reason; Skipper Pulls A Reverse Harrison
"Pirates' manager John Russell skipped the tour saying he'd rather visit when he has a World Series ring on his finger." [KDKA]...

Is The D-Train Back On Track?
Dontrelle Willis won a game yesterday. And his pitching was more than adequate! So has he finally got over his case of the Greinkes or is this just a momentary blip on the mine cart ride to oblivion?...

In Praise Of Dr. Z
In an otherwise touching account of Monday's benefit for the stricken Dr. Z, Peter King shares this depressing detail: "It's been almost six months since he's spoken, and he can't write, and he can't read."...

Mets Fan Swallowed By Citi Field Toilet
Oh, Mets fans! It feels like the whole world is out to get you, but honestly, you're kinda asking for it. When one of you goes diving into a baseball stadium toilet after a gold tooth and gets stuck ... we're all a little embarrassed for you....

Joe Theismann Can't Talk About MNF Without Sounding Bitter
"I don't think Tony was ever really comfortable in a role. I know the time that I spent with him, he really didn't want to do football. "[Fang's Bites]...

Say What You Want About Manny, But Don't Call Him Unethical
The New York Times' ethicist-in-chief declares that Manny Ramirez's steroid use was unwise, unsafe and "mars the beauty of the game," but it wasn't particularly unethical. [NYT]...

Enjoy Your Lettuce Wraps, Courtesy Of Briny Baird
The golfer hit a 230-yard, 34-story-high shot into Petco Park and won all of America free lettuce wraps from P.F. Chang's. Nice try, China—I'm not falling for that again. [SteadyBurn; Devil Ball Golf]...

James Harrison Has A Fear Of Flying, Not Of White House
Just when James Harrison became 1000% scarier due to his seemingly bizarre decision and reasoning to not visit the White House with his Steeler teammates, we find out he's not the anti-authoritarian lunatic we thought....

Mike Tirico Being Groomed For Bigger, Boomer Things
"In an apparent attempt to make Mike Tirico a younger Chris Berman, ESPN has juggled its lineup, giving its "Monday Night Football" play-by-play voice "a variety of high-profile TV and radio assignments." [Times-Union]...

Chris Hovan Did Not Kill A Doe, Wife Says
From last Friday's "Deadspin Deleted Scenes:" It appears the reader who wrote in about the Bucs' lineman's alleged late night conquest was mistaken. Shocker. That's what Chris Hovan's wife, Jaimi, told BucStats.com....
