eve Page 313 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Does Anyone Have The Heart To Tell This Guy That Nash Isn't American?
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or ordering some violent quiche, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast....

This Guy Hasn't Washed His Face Since 2004
They've announced the villain in the next Batman movie, and this one's the most insidious of all. His powers include super smugness, a photographic memory that does not include anything prior to 2001, and invisibility (should the conversation turn to the Bruins). Only posted comment to his photo so...

Elisha's Special Lady Will Freeze With the Rest
If Abby McGrew wants to watch her boy-toy Eli freeze his nuts off in Green Bay then she's going to have to layer-up. Cooper-Eli's eldest brother-tells the New York Post (they get all the scoops!) that the quarterback won't have his woman sitting in a luxury box, because it's bad luck of course!...

Cavs Beat Spurs (Seven Months Too Late)
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or reading many leather-bound books, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast....

Well, They've Really Got LeBron Now
The email hit our inbox with the equivalent of a Drudge Siren: LEBRON JAMES SPEEDING ARREST ... DASH CAM VIDEO! SEE VIDEO HERE! So we watched it....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN combed its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

LeBron Puts Pedal To The Metal
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or eating cereal, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast....

The Stars Come Out For The Australian Open
For the majority of her yearly tournament appearances, 17-year-old Austrian tennis star Tamira Paszek manages to keep the twins indoors, as they say. (OK, no one says that but me). But when the Australian Open rolls around, things change. She's out there, Jerry! And she's lovin' every minute of it...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning for its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Darren McFadden's Parents Aren't Saying Nothin' About Nothin'
"Yes he is." "No he isn't." "Is too." "Is not." "Shut up." "You shut up." "No, you shut up first." "No, your mom's ugly." There, now you're officially caught up to speed on the ongoing struggle between Darren McFadden's parents and media reports alleging their son is turning pro after his junior yea...

Who Are We? "The Blues!" Who Are We Gonna Beat? "The Blues!"
There doesn't seem to be a bevy of interesting games — even for soccer fans! — save for one game, Man City and Everton. They're separated by a mere three points at the top of the standings "tables," and Man City hasn't lost a game "match" to anyone recently except Tottenham. That kind of consistency...

Brady Quinn's Unfortunate Circumstances
With the news yesterday that the Browns are looking to sign Derek "Horse Balls" Anderson to long-term contract, we look ominously to a future that, sadly ... could be Brady Quinn-less....


LeBron And His Fourth Quarter Heroics
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or swimming beneath fire, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy....

Celtics Get Their Balls Back
Perhaps "untouchable" wasn't the right word to describe the DeTroit (I like it better that way) Pistons. Last night they had a chance to stick it to the Celtics again, and this time they had the pleasure of hosting the action. Yet it was not to be. The Celtics relied on Glen Davis'...uh...muscle to ...

Kenny Enjoys Popsicles
The man you see here iis one Kenny Irons of the Cincinnati Bengals. The downright fabulous picture was posted yesterday on the blog Bossip, who incidentally have one of the finest taglines on the internet. Before you go jumping to conclusions regarding Kenny's sexual proclivities you might want to c...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while finding alternate uses for your excess candy canes... • 5:00 p.m. — New Mexico Bowl: Nevada vs. New Mexico; 8:00 p.m. — Pioneer Las Vegas Bowl: BYU vs. UCLA. Wait, no non-sports-related sponsorship tie-in to the New Mexico Bowl? Not Interested. [ESPN] • 4:30 p.m. — College Basket...

About Last Night...
What you missed while explaining the jerkoff motion to your co-workers... • NCAA Football: SCHNELL! SCHNELL! Florida Atlantic quickly builds a football program and wins a bowl game. • NHL: Pssh. Ancient Chinese secret. Calgary falls to Dallas in overtime. • NBA: Portland's win streak is at 10, they'...

Dan Shanoff's Yearly Christmas Tome
Continuing a Christmas tradition on Deadspin (and, before that, other fine holiday establishments), Dan Shanoff presents a special holiday poem, dedicated to the many reindeer who pull the Deadspin sleigh — usually drunk, stoned or otherwise on crack. Happy holidays!...