evil Page 65 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Um, Gotta Support The Team?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Duke Is Back, And They Are Melodramatic
There are some unfamiliar names on this year's Blue Devils squad. Thankfully, they're making sure they give us things to make fun of them for....
Cross Country Hazing Gets A Little Vampiritic
One college track athlete learned the hard way that, rather than giving you the strength of your enemies, drinking blood will only get you kicked out of school and deported....
How Douche Was My Alma Mater?
With their liberal use of dirty girls and shirtless gods, GQ certainly knows how to bring in the eyeballs, but they have outdone themselves again with their latest listicle: "America's 25 Douchiest Colleges." No, you suck more!...
The Five-Star Columnist Is Unamused By Your Homophobic Taunts
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....
The Greg Paulus Experience Rolls On
What does it say about Syracuse that an ACC hoops player who didn't touch a football for four years is now their starting quarterback? What does it say about us that we can't quit Greg Paulus? [SU Athletics/Post-Standard/Bentern]...
Fox's Marketing Ploy May Have Been More Evil Than Previously Thought
It's bad enough that stupid Yuppie Gollum was nothing but a promotional stunt, but this is so much worse: A reader reports that Yuppie Gollum wasn't even at the All-Star Game. I'll let that sink in....
Monday's Lax Final Set, No One Outside Upstate New York Notices
Syracuse slams Duke in the Greg Paulus Bowl, Cornell shocks — shocks! — No. 1 Virginia in the nightcap. There really is nothing going on today. Softball on ESPN, lacrosse on ESPN2, Bernie Williams playing jazz on YES. Plus, Daulerio's making a packing list and checking it twice. [ESPN]...
Obama's Two Favorite Things Are The Steelers, Making Children Cry
A group of kindergarteners had their hearts broken yesterday when they showed up for a White House tour and were told they couldn't come in because staff had to prepare for the President's visit with the Pittsburgh Steelers. Also, because the tears of the innocent give Barack Obama sustenance....
Rudy Giuliani's Son Loses The Case Of "Duke vs. Spackler"
Andrew Giuliani used to play golf at Duke University until the coach that recruited him died, and the new coach realized that he was a terrible golfer. Andy sued after being booted from the team and the judge made him look stupid by quoting Caddyshack as he dismissed the case....
Top Draft Prospect About To Get Paid
Top draft prospect Stephen Strasburg pitched a 17 K, no hitter in his last home game at San Diego State. Expect the Nationals to draft him before getting anally raped by his agent, Scott Boras....
ESPNU/Time Warner Cable Experiencing Technical Difficulties, Porn (NSFW)
There can't be that many people watching ESPNU at 3:17AM, but on Saturday there was at least one, and he got a little surprise while hunting for a late-night sports fix (very NSFW)....
New Jersey Would Probably Like That Last Minute Back
It's one thing to give up the game-tying goal in the last 1:20 of a Game 7, but to give up a game-tying and game-winning goal in the last 1:20—that's probably going to haunt you....
The Loyalty Of Greg Paulus Is Now In Question
First he wants to play football for some Big Ten school—now Duke's posterboy is being photographed holding a baby in Carolina Blue? Or maybe he's about to eat it? [850Buzz, via RTC; explanation here]...
Yes, Hockey Does Have Buzzer-Beaters
After giving up a 3-goal lead, Carolina beats New Jersey on a slap shot with 0.2 seconds left in the game, which I guess is not a lot of time remaining.[NHL]...
Greg Paulus: Two-Sport Annoyance
Guess what, Duke haters? The Green Bay Packers might be interested in Greg Paulus. (He was the Gatorade Football Player of the Year in high school.) I guess the Yankees didn't return his phone call. [PFT; WRAL]...
Jack Elway Will Never Be Like You, Dad!
He had the genes, the Aryan good looks, and the resources to become a top-flight college quarterback. If only someone had checked to see if John Elway's son ever cared about football in the first place....
A Night At The Garden With Sean Avery And Friends
Last night, I went to Madison Square Garden for the first time since I caught the circus there at age four, and one thing was immediately clear—Ranger fans love Sean Avery....
You'll Have To Wait Until 2010-11 To See Seth Curry As A Blue Devil
Andy Katz leaves the glitz and glamor of President Obama's brackets to return to the humdrum grind of regular sports news, reporting that Seth Curry has decided to transfer to Duke. [Rush The Court]...