evil Page 69 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Revenge Of The Duke Hobbits
Jonah Keri writes the college basketball closer (more or less) daily. E-mail your questions, comments or Clarence Ceasar-related memories to [email protected]....
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
Fumble! Everybody On It, Including Stepsons
By now, you've probably heard about Chris Jessie, Mack Brown's stepson who stupidly grabbed a loose fumble last night during Texas' thumping of Arizona State in the Holiday Bowl. It's pretty entertaining....
Marty Brodeur Is Happy Again
We are proud to welcome famed hockey journalist James Mirtle to the post of NHL Closer writer this week....
The Rays Want You To Walk The Plank
In case you haven't seen it yet, right there's the blueprint for the new Tampa Bay Devil Rays stadium. It's a $450 million pirate ship. And, of course, the team currently has no plan to pay for it. Pretty, though ... we guess....
Get This ... Duke Now Hates ESPN
As we all know, Duke basketball and ESPN grew up together; slept on each other's sofas, double-dated, brought each other homework when the other was too hung over to make it to class. But now the relationship has become frosty. Hey, we all grow up, man. Duke and ESPN just don't like all of the same ...
Yet Another Reason Never To Visit Hawaii
OK, maybe Duke's a little better than we realized. And maybe Illinois still hasn't learned how to shoot. Here you see Brian Randle, fouling someone, as usual. Duke's good again, everybody: Spread the word. Then cringe....
Welcome Back, Duke Haters
We know the college basketball is officially underway because ... everyone's Duke bile is building! We've missed it; it's nice having villains, even if they haven't actually done that much lately that was particularly villainous....
Everybody Keep Piling On Notre Dame!
As we come to the final death spasms of the glory/hideousness of the Notre Dame season, we stop to do a brief dance on the Irish grave. How bad has it become? Freaking Duke thinks it has a chance to win in South Bend this weekend....
Colts and Pats Match-Up Poised to Tilt Axis of Earth
The Indianapolis Colts/New England Patriots death-match hype is reaching its condition critical stage, as every single person on the planet tangentially-related to either one of those regions or to sports writing has to have an opinion about it. They must. This is the game of the millennium, you see...
Duke, North Carolina Make It Rain
Back off, people! We know that there's a drought, and you're thirsty. But this water is being saved to drench the synthetic turf at the field hockey stadium. We have our priorities at Duke University....
Kevin Costner Gets To Pretend He Plays Baseball Again
With their whole name change — no more evil Rays! — Tampa Bay is unveiling their new uniforms next month. And they're bringing out the big guns for the experience....
Pitching Coach Fails In Escape From Tropicana Field
This man is Jim Hickey, the pitching coach for the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. As you'd expect, life as the pitching coach of the Devil Rays — sorry: Tampa Bay Rays — is not easy. It's enough to drive a man to drink....
Nowhere To Go But Up For The "Rays"
It is sad when an American institution dies, the rain, as some lady said once, washing the memories off the sidewalks of life. Or something....
The D-Rays Have Funk
In another of their amusing attempts to garner some positive publicity, the Devil Rays hosted '70s Disco Night at the Trop on Saturday. Of all the wacky scoreboard pictures, this one, and of course Delmon Young's, are our favorites....
Barry In Tampa ... What Might Have Been
As we continue our plodding march toward "history," a march that has taken so long that we can't even keep up our outrage anymore, we consider what might have been....
Elijah Dukes' Divorce Proceedings, Shockingly, Are Getting Nasty
As you probably might expect, the wife of "troubled" Devil Rays outfielder Elijah Dukes is filing for divorce. (This tends to happen when you send your wife's cell phones photos of guns.) She has come up with some not-really-all-that-surprising accusations....