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‘Ambassador’ Karl Malone, bumbling Knicks, and more forgettable moments from All-Star Saturday Night

All-Star Saturday has always had cookout vibes, and McClung earned another invite for next year. But someone had to bring the unseasoned cole slaw. Karl Malone’s presence as an ambassador and a judge who got entirely too many nods from the NBA and the broadcast made things way too awkward. Malone — ...

The 2023 basketball HOF finalists have a legacy worthy of the honor

The list of finalists for the Naismith Memorial Basketball Hall of Fame is a snapshot of an era. Dirk Nowitzki and Dwyane Wade headline the class, having met twice in the NBA Finals, splitting the titles between them. Gregg Popovich, Tony Parker, and Becky Hammon are forever San Antonio Spurs. And t...

The Milwaukee Brewers are why small-market baseball is dying

How much money is $750,000 to a baseball team, hm? According to Spotrac, the Milwaukee Brewers have already determined the 2023 salaries for 20 of their players. All of them will be earning more than $1 million. Given that MLB rosters can consist of 26 people, we can say that, at most, six Brewers w...

Thierry Henry as the USMNT’s next coach isn’t as bad as you think

The direction of the United States men’s national team nearly three months after its World Cup campaign in Qatar began is in flux. The Yanks are at the wheel, but don’t know whether to hit the gas or the brake. The car is in neutral at a time where that’s acceptable, but not ideal. Making the right ...

2023 NBA Anti-All-Stars: The dregs of the East

The NBA All-Star Game is an honor bestowed upon the most distinguished hoopers every season. Unfortunately, that’s not what we’re doing here. Their time will come. However, the NBA’s worst rotation players deserve to receive their dead flowers too. Stare into this dark void with me and commemorate t...

Gus Kenworthy believes reaction to Carl Nassib coming out wasn’t all positive for the LGBTQ+ community

Gus Kenworthy knows a thing or two about breaking boundaries in sports for LGBTQ+ athletes. He was the first openly gay X Games athlete and alongside good friend and figure skater Adam Rippon, he was half of the first openly gay duo to represent the United States in the Winter Olympics at the 2018 g...

The New York Knickerbockers are hot, so what’s their ceiling?

The New York Knicks are officially hot for the New York Knicks. They’ve won six of the past eight, and eight of 12. New addition Josh Hart is 9-of-14 from deep in his first three games (all wins) with his old Villanova teammate Jalen Brunson, and Tom Thibodeau has enough talent that Derrick Rose is ...

Being a backup QB is the best gig in all of sports

Amid the controversy surrounding the holding penalty at the end of Super Bowl LVII, rumors of Andy Reid’s retirement, and people trashing Travis Kelce for saying everyone doubted Kansas City when absolutely zero people doubted them, several other storylines have been overlooked. While Andy Reid may ...

2023 NBA Anti-All-Stars: The dregs of the West

The NBA All-Star Game is an honor bestowed upon the most distinguished hoopers every season. Unfortunately, that’s not what we’re doing here. Their time will come. However, the NBA’s worst rotation players deserve to receive their dead flowers too. Stare into this dark void with me and commemorate t...

Philadelphia Eagles fans’ biggest misstep? Hope

Welcome to Deadspin’s The Sports Nihilist, where all is for naught and we are but accidental jolts of electrified meat stuck to the surface of a rock in an indifferent universe. Fuck you....

Why Jay White should go to WWE

The red-zone tactic that won the Chiefs the Super Bowl

Down 10 at halftime, the Kansas City Chiefs did what they do best, mount a comeback to earn their second Super Bowl title in four years. It was a masterful second-half performance from Chiefs’ offensive coordinator Eric Bieniemy, who outmaneuvered Eagles’ defensive coordinator Jonathan Gannon — who ...

Here's what you need to know as the Champions League returns

It only feels like the Champions League is late in returning for its knockout stage, but this is the normal time of year. What isn’t normal is cramming a World Cup in between the group stages and the knockouts, which makes it seem like this season has already gone on forever even when most leagues a...

Jim Caldwell having to work under Frank Reich is a slap in the face

The Carolina Panthers — who are owned by a man who claims to be trying to end the “old boys network” within the NFL despite hiring a white head coach over a qualified Black one — have a new coaching staff that’s led by the trio of Frank Reich, Dom Capers, and Jim Caldwell. The hierarchy in Carolina ...

And now for the NHL trade deadline, which is much more boring than the NBA's [Updated]

The NBA can shift its entire axis in a trade deadline — like Brooklyn shipping Kyrie Irving to Dallas and Kevin Durant to Phoenix — or in free agency. The NFL is starting to put more jazz into both its deadline and offseason. MLB could if any owner wanted to actually spend money outside of Queens. T...

MLB cares more about middle relievers — and money — than the fans

No one comes up with a solution for a problem that doesn’t exist quite like MLB. It’s their specialty....

NBA Schedule: The best games to watch for All-Star Week

Did you take a puff of your inhaler? A shot of dark liquor?...

New York Giant sleeper cell does its job, prevents the Eagles from another title

Sunday night could’ve been really shitty for New York Giants fans. The Philadelphia Eagles were on the precipice of a second Super Bowl win in six years, lighting the Empire State Building green (again), and it’s enough to make you abstain from cheesesteaks for at least a few months. Yet, when it ma...

The best (and worst) moments of the Super Bowl's first half

The pre-game on FOX ridiculously started at noon. And we’ve been here the entire time. You didn’t miss anything until approximately 5:30 pm ET, when FOX aired the first Snackin’ with the Stars ad....

AI-generated Kevin Burkhardt and Greg Olsen lapse into an existential crisis during the Super Bowl

ChatGPT is a lot of fun to mess around with. It is also going to steal my job within the next five years. So until that happens, let’s use it for extremely stupid purposes, such as this procedurally generated dialogue in which Greg Olsen and Kevin Burkhardt become increasingly concerned about the na...