ew Page 2947 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Reconstructing The Most Exciting Day In The History Of Soccer (And Maybe Sports, Period)
The final day of the 2011 MLB regular season enchanted us with its insanity; its events became a video game montage and inspired its own tag here on Deadspin. That day, however, only determined which teams would gain entry to the playoffs. By comparison, Sunday's final day of the English Premier ...

People Actually Attend Baseball Game In Pittsburgh, Security Guard Loses Finger, Cop Injures Shoulder Slapping Woman
That's how the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette reported what went down Saturday night at PNC Park, at least in part. It started when 21-year-old Rachel George was allegedly smoking in her seat, which led to George being escorted to the ballpark's security office. But then George's boyfriend and father got i...

Laurie Fine Goes To A Castle To Tell The World She Didn't Hump The Ball Boy (Among Other Things)
GENEVA, N.Y.—At 11 a.m. today, Laurie Fine stood outside of a castle about an hour west of the Syracuse University apartments in which, according to a former ball boy's testimony, she had sex with Syracuse men's basketball players. Here, flanked by the sun, the tweeting birds, and the rippling water...

Curt Schilling Wants A Government Bailout
Curt Schilling's 38 Studios is having issues. They recently pulled out of the upcoming Electronic Entertainment Expo because their new game, codenamed "Project Copernicus," isn't going to be ready on time. That game is being built with tens of millions of dollars guaranteed by Rhode Island taxpayers...

Better Know An Umpire: Bill Miller
Welcome to Better Know An Umpire, an effort to educate ourselves on the human elements who have ultimate decision-making power over some 2,500 Major League Baseball games a year. (All cumulative statistics are through the 2011 season, unless otherwise stated.)...

The Angels Are Getting Desperate
Seven games out of first. No one's hitting. (Hitting coach Mickey Hatcher got the ax today.) Nothing seems to be working. So Fox Sports West, despite a win yesterday, made a plea via on-screen graphic. Somebody do something. Anything. Call up Minor League Guy. [via @nocoastoffense]...

Sean Payton Is The Prophet Elijah
New Orleans is getting used to life without Sean Payton, who has begun serving a one-year suspension for his role in the bounty scandal. There was always the possibility that the Saints would handle the situation quietly and without hyperbole or fanfare, not wanting to draw attention to the actions ...

24-Year-Old Finance Guy Asks All His Dates To Complete A Creepy Survey Afterward
Last month, we brought you a finance guy's way-too-detailed spreadsheet of the ladies he met on Match.com. A reader who enjoyed that post then passed along this survey she received from a man she briefly dated in Philadelphia....

How I Threw My Hair-Perm Superfly Spitball, By Dock Ellis: A New Animated Short
The video above is "Superfly Spitball," an animated short that grew out of the same interview—conducted by Donnell Alexander and Neille Ilel—that gave us Dock Ellis & The LSD No-No. Animated by Heidi Perry and co-produced by Thor Swift, the short will appear in a forthcoming iBook, Beyond Ellis D....

What Dock Ellis Taught Me About Drugs, Spitballs, Hair Curlers, Office Culture, Race, And America
Be sure to watch the accompanying animated short, "Superfly Spitball."...

Skechers Will Pay $40M To Settle A Lawsuit About Its Goofy-Looking Shoes That Were Supposed To Help People Lose Weight
Look at that ugly, ugly shoe. It's a white Skechers Shape-Up. Scocca wrote in February that Nike's Galaxy Foamposites were the ugliest shoes ever, but we'll have to disagree on this one. These shoes grace an aesthetic level that Phil Knight can only dream about....

Outtakes From My Four Hours With Justin Bieber, The Swaggiest Of Swaggy Bros
I interviewed Justin Bieber for GQ—Bieber had just turned 18, so they sent me to Los Angeles to try to make a man out of him—and one of the strange things about his life is that he seems to be surrounded by adults at all times. He arrived at the studio surrounded by adults. His two closest friends a...

Laurie Fine To File Libel Suit Against ESPN
That "major announcement" that Laurie Fine promised for us later this morning, at a castle for some reason? It's exactly what you thought. Fine is bringing a libel lawsuit against ESPN, reporter Mark Schwarz, and producer Arty Berko for their reporting of child sexual abuse allegations against forme...

Shaq beat Chuck In TNT's <em>Inside The NBA</em> Shirt-Off Thanks To Fake, Painted-On Abs
The Inside The NBA "Shirt-Off" that brought us this priceless moment of Charles Barkley handling a Shake Weight came to its conclusion last night, with Chuck and Shaq disrobing to show off their unique physiques. While Sir Charles's suspiciously pube-like chest hair was horrifying enough, it wasn't...

Win This Auction And Brett Favre Will Play Ball With Your Young Child (Shipping And Handling Not Included)
The fine folks at Charitybuzz are auctioning off a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to have former NFL quarterback and Hattiesburg townie Brett Favre throw the ol' pigskin around with your kid for an indeterminate amount of time. Sounds like a great deal? Sure! That is, until you get to the fine print...

The Los Angeles Galaxy Was Extremely Happy To Visit The White House
There's a lot going in this photo, taken today during the LA Galaxy's obligatory champion's visit to the White House. (Well, not everyone finds it necessary.) As usual, Obama looks happier than anyone else, although a beaming Bruce Arena seems up to the challenge....

Here Is A Video Of Charles Barkley Using A Shake Weight In Extremely Slow Motion
TNT's Inside The NBA hosts Shaquille O'Neal and Charles Barkley are engaged in some sort of workout competition, and tonight Shaq tossed Charles Barkley a Shake Weight to help Chuck's battle of the bulk. While it doesn't appear Sir Charles understands the device too well, it's still a delicious i...

Umpire Bill Miller Has Bad Night, Gets Hit First By Brett Lawrie's Helmet And Then A Blue Jays Fan's Beer
In what's turning out to be a bad day for MLB umpires, Bill Miller—behind the plate for tonight's Rays-at-Jays matchup in Toronto—suffered the wrath of Brett Lawrie's helmet after the Blue Jays third baseman took issue with Miller's strike zone....

Former NBA Coach Plagiarizes Spurs Message Board For ESPN.com Column
John Carroll was the head coach at Duquesne for six years, and an assistant coach in the NBA for nine—including a 36-game stint as interim head coach for the Celtics in 2004. He's now sharing his expertise for Scouts Inc., which was purchased by ESPN in 2006. Since then Carroll's scouting reports ha...

Rick Reilly's Auto-Response To Reader Email Is More Clever Than Rick Reilly's Actual Column
Ever email your constructive criticism to a sportswriter, only to receive a crappy, needlessly hostile response? Forward the emails to us at [email protected], subject: Crap Emails....