ew Page 3473 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Penis-Curious News Anchor Responds
Michael HIll, news anchor for New Orleans's ABC affiliate and a man with a penchant for wonderfully awkward questions, has seen our post and writes in to say he does indeed know from banter. E-mail after the jump....

Ex-Giant Brad Benson Is Greatest Ad Wizard Since Don Draper
Like many former athletes, New York Giant alumnus Brad Benson found a second career as a successful car dealer. Unlike most of them, however, he's made another name for himself as a filthy-minded, possibly unhinged radio pitchman....

Men Who Look Like Old Lesbians: Will Leitch Edition
The floppy-haired hero from the hardscrabble streets of Mattoon, Ill. received a king's welcome at Busch Stadium and got the old pre-game treatment from the local Fox affiliate.For some reason he chose to wear Annie Leibovitz's eyeglasses....

Plenty Of Good Jets Seats Still Available
The Jets, for all their quarterback poise, for all their "Hard Knocks" star power, for all their shutdown secondary, are in real danger of local TV blackouts this season. Are they a victim of their own success?...

The Mets Know How To Seize, Uh ... An Opportunity
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Nets Are First Domino To Fall To Russian Invaders
The NBA has formally approved the sale of the New Jersey Nets to mad Russian billionaire Mikhail Prokhorov. To celebrate, all season tickets will receive a free cobalt mine. [NY1]...

Lebron Vows To Save New York
Sure, it's a former Albany mayoral candidate-turned-deputy commissioner at the State Liquor Authority named Nathan Lebron. But still, could you imagine? [Times Union]...

Drew Rosenhaus Breaking Flaming Bricks Is A Metaphor For His Negotiating Skills ... Or Something
Turns out Drew Rosenhaus, noted driveway-press-conference hobbyist, also enjoys training in the martial arts when he isn't forcing your favorite team to give an extra year and $3 million dollar roster bonus to Olindo Mare. [Tauntr]...

Chat With Will Leitch Until He Drops (UPDATE: He's Dropped)
Will's in the comments, and he will remain there until you're through with him. Remember to read his book, Are We Winning Ben Stein's Money? And read this, too, while you're at it. UPDATE: He's done, just shy of the three-hour mark....

Erin Andrews: "Darrin's Dance Grooves" Superstar
Ten years ago, Darrin Henson was the Tom Emanski of instructional dance videos. He had one enthusiastic pupil, though. Yes, at the :45 mark, the future Sideline Princess was doing her best hard-sell on one of the lamest infomercial videos ever....

Join Us Monday For A Marathon Live Chat With Will Leitch
Leitch will be taking your questions at 1 p.m. tomorrow — about his book, about whatever — and he says he'll hang around until you have none left. We're gunning for your record, Neyer....

Attack Of The Customized Jerseys Starts Off With A...Bang
Now that baseball season feels officially official, the customized jerseys are becoming more plentiful. If you see one on par with Captain Fingerbang up there, please send it to [email protected]. Subject: Customized Jersey. (H/T A.Heacock)...

Tell Me How My Class Tastes: Scenes From The Worst NFL Draft Party Ever
This is, on the surface, the tale of the lamest NFL Draft party of all time. But it's also a story about class and about fans who project their own anxieties on their favorite teams and about teams that respond in kind....

Dairy Council Takes The Fall For The Patriots
Remember when the Patriots ditched a nice little middle school event to, I dunno, go shoot up drugs or something? It wasn't their fault, says this New England Dairy Council press release, which was probably drafted at Belichick gunpoint....

Patriots Stand Up Middle Schoolers
A Connecticut middle school won the opportunity to work out with Patriots players. They received a visit from a team intern, and some exercise videos....

When Golf Meets Cliff Diving
A New Zealand man fell 100 feet off a cliff while looking for his golf ball yesterday. Looks like someone read that article on how valuable lost balls are. [New Zealand Herald]...

Gabrielle Union Got It On In Front Of Dwyane Wade's Kids
That's according to a lawsuit filed by Wade's estranged wife, which he calls "baseless." Because, c'mon, who hasn't had stepmom fantasies about Gabrielle Union? Wait, what was I talking about?...

A Short Video About The Snazzy New World Cup Ball
Of course, when football was first invented, it was probably played using sheep bladders wrapped in velvet cloaks, or old fishermen skulls....

Jets Fans Are Rational People And The Team In No Way Has Unrealistic Expectations
Jets fans predict 15-1 season. Rex Ryan asks, "who'd we lose to?" I think Hard Knocks should move from HBO to late-night Cinemax, because I'm getting hard just thinking about it. [ESPN]...

A Prayer For Steve Bartman
The following is adapted from Will Leitch's Are We Winning? Fathers and Sons and the New Golden Age of Baseball....