ew Page 3498 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

It Never Gets Old
So they spent more money than anyone else. So they didn't have to wait as long as anyone else. Ask us fans if it feels any less amazing. It doesn't....

Important Baseball Game Not Involving The Red Sox Still Somehow All About The Red Sox
Shocking development, via Dan Shaughnessy: The ongoing longitudinal study of narcissistic personality disorder known as Red Sox Nation has somehow contrived to turn Game 6 of a Phillies-Yankees World Series into a drama centering on ... Red Sox Nation...

Searching For...Enrique Wilson
Since our fine, upstanding readership was so helpful in tracking down Jose Lima for his ex-wife, Melissa, another ex-lover of a ballplayer requests your assistance. Yes, deadbeat wranglers, you've been deputized again. Please help Ms. Marina Valdez....

The Bandwagon Is Actually A Nissan Truck (STILL MORE UPDATES)
Updates Yankee/Cowboy fans come out of the woodwork to defend themselves below......

Owning A Russian Basketball Team Can Be Hazardous To Your Health
If future Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov ever invites you to watch a game in the owner's box, don't accept. Not only will you be stuck watching the Nets, there's a decent chance you'll be caught up in an assassination attempt....

World Series Open Thread: It's Always Poultry In Philadelphia
We (most likely) bid farewell to the 2009 season with this absurd tableau of a gentleman in a chicken suit, a sad Tigger and a clutch of Citizens Bank Park security guards, beseeching them to kindly settle the fuck down....

The Terrifying Horrors Of Sports-O-Ween
We've tallied the results and as suspected....your Halloween costumes kind of stunk. Don't sweat it though. At least you weren't burned alive for going to a Scottish soccer match dressed as a sheep....

American Who Won NYC Marathon Isn't American Enough For Some People
American Meb Keflezighi won the New York City Marathon yesterday, which seemed pretty cool until a couple of wet blankets came along to remind everyone he's only "technically" American....

Alex Rodriguez Wins The Weekend (Again)
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Alex Rodriguez, who won the weekend by pretty much just owning these playoffs. He's like some amazing mythical creature!...

Return Of The "Rock N' Roll" Tongue Bath
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Starbury And The Knicks, Together In Fail For Eternity
Stephon, true to his word, bought a ticket and sat in the front row at the Knicks game last night. But he was asked to leave, because the ticket he bought wasn't for the front row. Nothing ever changes....

A-Rod News From The 'You Can't Make This Stuff Up' Department...
Like I do every day, when I want a dose of hard-hitting sports news, I turn to US Weekly. The periodical has not one but two bits of information regarding our heroic, purple-lipped, World Series-strikeout machine....

David Wells Thinks The People Of Philadelphia Are A Bunch Of Meanie-Weenies
Geez, I guess they'll let anyone write for the New York Post. David Wells, in a column I would describe as "portly," because, well, for no reason, shares some of his experiences interacting with the wonderful, friendly people from Philadelphia....

Matt D'Agostini Got Knocked The Fuggout
Chicago Blackhawks Andrew Ladd absolutely leveled Montreal Canadiens right winger Matt D'Agostini early in last night's 3-2 Chicago victory. More talk about head shots! Whee!...

Send Us Your Lame Sports-O-Ween Costumes
Tomorrow is All Hallows' Eve and you may be tempted to put on a sport-themed costume in an effort to win candy and prizes. You should seriously rethink that strategy. Sorry, but there can only be one Baby Mangino....

Why Your Stadium Sucks: Yankee Stadium
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: Yankee Fucking Stadium....

October: <em>Fin</em>.
We produce a lot of posts every month. Most of them disappear quickly. Some of them don't. Here are the 10 most popular posts from October, ranked low to high....

DENTAL PLAN! (Girardi Needs Braces!)
Take a close look at Joe Girardi's mouth. Why would a grown man wear braces, specifically during the one month of his life when he's most likely to be on national TV? A pretty sweet reason, actually....

World Series, Game Two: Can't Find A Better Yankee?
Pearl Jam is spending this week in residence at the Spectrum and conveniently offering "ring girl" updates for grungy Phillies fans who temporarily chose rock over baseball. Sell outs....

NBA Will Review Allegations In Donaghy Book It Sought To Quash
The NBA says Lawrence B. Pedowitz, the guy who investigated the league's officiating program last time around, will look into the allegations we documented yesterday from Tim Donaghy's Blowing the Whistle. The NBA: Where Donaghy continues to happen. [CBSSports]...